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Loving Neverland

One of the statistics I have cited lo these two-plus decades is that most men have their first sexual experience with other men.  I realize this is not particularly scandalous to the men reading this column.  But we are talking all men – straight and gay alike.  Before you go all Corey Feldman on me, the term “sexual experience” often refers to a “circle jerk”, which figures into so many art films in my collection.  This came back to me when I read about the proliferation of jerk-off clubs targeting straight men.  Before you rush off to buy a membership, it should be noted that these clubs have strict policies against any oral or anal interaction, and one must keep one’s hands to oneself.  Kinda takes all the fun out of it.

This inevitably leads to a discussion about Leaving Neverland.  I can’t imagine anything in there shocked or even surprised my readers.  Learning that Michael taught these boys how to masturbate fits into the aforementioned statistic.  But the similarity ends there.  Beyond all that sex stuff – which I believed – these boys (now men) truly loved Michael Jackson.  What troubles most people about this – aside from, of course, the idea of falling in love with one’s abuser – is that these men identify themselves as heterosexual.  Not only heterosexual, but married with children.  I have had numerous discussions with people who cannot comprehend how any of this is possible.  But what this doc hammered home was how it is possible to have two completely contradictory feelings at the same time.  Kudos to Oprah’s after-show for focusing primarily on Wade and Jimmy’s emotional turmoil.  Again, putting the sex aside, these boys who had no romantic experience fell totally in love with Michael and saw themselves tossed aside when the latest Culkin came down the pike.  I know how I feel when someone stops returning my calls, or simply moves on.  I can’t imagine what someone their age felt like.  I suspect this emotional upheaval is what has caused the most psychological damage, and I feel for them…but not in that JO club kinda way.

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