{"id":94073,"date":"2025-08-03T22:58:04","date_gmt":"2025-08-04T05:58:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.billymasters.com\/custom\/?p=94073"},"modified":"2025-08-03T23:06:23","modified_gmt":"2025-08-04T06:06:23","slug":"dame-joan-takes-on-lime-bikes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.billymasters.com\/custom\/blog\/2025\/08\/03\/dame-joan-takes-on-lime-bikes\/","title":{"rendered":"Dame Joan Versus Lime Bikes"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201cI am not an incredibly prejudiced person but, when it
\ncomes to heterosexual men, I don\u2019t get them. 
\nThey\u2019re a bunch of assholes.  There are so few
\nheterosexual men that I know that I look up to.\u201d
\n– <\/em>Harvey Fierstein <\/strong>on the subject of straight men.  I guess it\u2019s about
\nperspective.  I\u2019ve not looked up to many, but I\u2019ve certainly looked
\ndown on a few \u2013 and I found them quite adept at the job at hand.<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

If there\u2019s one thing I am loath to do, it\u2019s promote someone else\u2019s column.  But when the someone else is Dame Joan Collins <\/strong>\u2013 well, reason goes out the window.  She\u2019s not the competition, she\u2019s a legend.  Her column appears in The Spectator<\/em> in London.  Here\u2019s a sample of her scribbling: \u201cSeveral news outlets are reporting the surge in the dangerous crossings of immigrants coming to our shores, and the cost of giving them succour.\u201d  Let me pause here to try and eradicate the image of Collins giving succour to an eager line of anyone.  \u201cBut I\u2019m seeing an invasion of a different sort \u2013 the proliferation of rental bikes and powered scooters that litter our pavements.  I\u2019ve recently been almost run over twice by \u2018Lime <\/em>bikes\u2019.  I\u2019ve also tripped over a bunch of discarded cycles on the streets of Belgravia.\u201d  For the love of God \u2013 keep the Lime <\/em>bikes (and scooters) away from Dame Joan!  We can\u2019t have her mowed down in her prime.  We\u2019re thisclose away from her centennial, and I refuse to cancel those festivities due to a broken hip.  Admittedly, the three wigs she wears simultaneously should cushion the fall and avoid a concussion.  In fact, they could act as a helmet should she wish to ride one of the aforementioned scooters.  God save the Queen!<\/p>\n

\"colorbar1\"<\/a><\/p>\n

You may recall Mario Paglino <\/strong>and Gianni Grossi <\/strong>as Barbie <\/em><\/strong>doll designers who made some unofficial Madonna <\/strong>dolls that were presented to her on The Graham Norton Show<\/em><\/strong> (she was less than gracious).  Alas, the duo was killed in an auto accident in Italy \u2013 where car fatalities are an art form.  The incident took place between Piedmont and Lombardy, when someone driving the wrong way struck them head-on.  Mattel issued a statement mourning their loss (they operated under the name Magia2000<\/em>) and put a spotlight on their artistry and philanthropy.  \u201cTheir generosity was boundless, creating countless dolls to be auctioned to benefit charities close to fellow collectors\u2019 hearts.  Barbie<\/em> is better because they loved the brand, and our beloved collector community is richer for having known them and shared in their passion.  Barbie honors their memory with deep gratitude\u201d.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cI am not an incredibly prejudiced person but, when it comes to heterosexual men, I don\u2019t get them.  They\u2019re a bunch of assholes.  There are so few heterosexual men that I know that I look up to.\u201d – Harvey Fierstein on the subject of straight men.  I guess it\u2019s about perspective.  I\u2019ve not looked up<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":[]},"categories":[18],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.billymasters.com\/custom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/94073"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.billymasters.com\/custom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.billymasters.com\/custom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.billymasters.com\/custom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.billymasters.com\/custom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=94073"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.billymasters.com\/custom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/94073\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":94089,"href":"https:\/\/www.billymasters.com\/custom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/94073\/revisions\/94089"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.billymasters.com\/custom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=94073"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.billymasters.com\/custom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=94073"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.billymasters.com\/custom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=94073"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}