The Michael Jackson biopic opened to record-breaking box office numbers.  Michael itself got pretty awful reviews – not that anyone suggested the film is badly acted or directed.  The words used were more like “sanitized”, “surface-level”, “greatest hits”.  Even Jaafar Jackson got off (so to speak) as a capable actor and an even better dancer and performer.  But anyone looking for depth or reality about Jackson’s life should look elsewhere.  You’d also better look elsewhere if you’re trying to find Janet Jackson.  We got the lowdown from LaToya (who never met a microphone she didn’t like, in one way or another).  “I wish everybody was in the movie.  [Janet] was asked and she kindly declined so you have to respect her wishes.”  It should be noted that the Jackson family has a huge financial stake in the flick, and Michael’s “son”, Prince Jackson, is an executive producer.  Paris and Blanket are not involved.  Paris, in particular, has criticized the film as having “a lot of full blown lies”.  “The film panders to a very specific section of my dad’s fandom that still lives in the fantasy.  And they’re going to be happy with it.”

You should know that the film planned to include the child molestation allegations in the final section.  However, attorneys for the Jackson estate realized that there was a clause in Michael’s settlement with Jordan Chandler that “barred the depiction or mention of him in any movie”.  So that entire storyline was scrapped and the film ends in 1988.  There is, however, talk of a sequel.

Here’s the diva story that everybody’s talking about – Cher’s secret granddaughter.  First, let’s clear this up – the kid was no secret.  Cher heard about the child that Kayti Edwards gave birth to in 2010 and knew there was a good chance it was sired by her son, Elijah Blue Allman.  Kayti says, “Cher got in touch with me last June and asked if it was true, so I had to confess.”  Believe it or not, that’s not the craziest part.  Kayti Edwards’ step-grandmother is Julie Andrews!  So this kid has a great-grandmother who was Mary Poppins and a grandmother that straddled a 16-inch naval gun on the battleship USS Missouri clad in a black leather thong bodysuit!  Talk about diversity!

By the way, Cher has once again petitioned the court to place Elijah under a temporary conservatorship.  She claims he “has no concept of money” and “is unable to manage his financial resources and is unable to withstand fraud or undue influence” because of his “severe mental health and addiction issues”.  Elijah’s half-brother also told the court that he “is currently a danger to himself and unable to manage his life and any funds that would become available to him.”  Elijah Blue is also estranged from his wife, Marieangela King, who filed for divorce last April.  She was granted $6,500 a month in temporary spousal support along with custody of their 2017 Toyota Prius.