Marc Shaiman is a big supporter of the Black Lives Matter movement.  His musical version of Hairspray tackled racial tensions in Baltimore, circa 1962.  During the climactic “You Can’t Stop the Beat”, Motormouth Mabel sings, “And tomorrow is a brand new day, and it don’t know white from black”.  Shaiman made the following declaration: “But PLEASE note, in all future productions, the colorblindness that was a goal for many years will be improved, and the lyric will now be ‘And tomorrow is a brand new day and it sees both white and black!’”.

Speaking of Hairspray, the star of the film version just came out officially!  No, not John Travolta.  And, no, not Queen Latifah.  The Tracy – Nikki Blonsky.  While this was not news to those of us who know and love her, it was a bold public proclamation from a bold kinda gal.  She made the announcement as only she could.  She posted a video of herself dancing in the yard along to the music of Diane Ross’ “I’m Coming Out”.  The caption was simple.  “Hi, it’s Nikki Blonsky from the movie I’m Gay!”

Back in May, Nikki Blonsky and I excitedly talked about her being on Billy Masters LIVE!  Unfortunately, I planned to only feature out LGBT guests for the month of June.  So I made a note to circle back to Nikki at the end of June.  And then, poof, she came out!  We’ll have her on soon.

This past week, Billy Masters LIVE started off on a sexy note.  Tuesday’s show featured Tom Judson (aka Gus Mattox), Florian Klein (aka Hans Berlin), and David Pevsner discussing working in gay erotica and in the legitimate theatre.  A very fun episode with lots of dish.  And then on Thursday, we featured singers Sam Harris and Billy Gilman.  It was my first time: a) having a guest named Billy and 2) “meeting” Gilman.  And the whole show was a complete delight.  Not only did they have so much in common in terms of career trajectory and attitudes about singing, they’re also big fans of each other.  Check us out on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 3PM Eastern on YouTube.com/c/BillyMastersTV, or on the TV tab at BillyMasters.com/TV.

In a rather bland story, Vanilla Ice planned a concert in Austin called Independence Day Throwback Beach Party – even though it was taking place on Friday, July 3^rd.  While venues were shuttered, the beach is connected to a restaurant and doubles as a general admission concert space with a reduced capacity of 2,500 (down from the usual 5K).  With all these loopholes, the show could go on…but not without criticism.  The Travis County Health Department issued the following warning: “The best way to be nostalgic is protecting your parents and grandparents and staying home.”  The event ended up being “postponed”.  The promoter said, “Due to the increase in Covid-19 numbers in Austin, we’re gonna move the concert to a better date.”  It should be noted that Ice played the same venue last year and sold 1,800 tickets.  For this show, a whopping 84 tickets were sold!

By the way, the people of Texas are getting real ornery about the pandemic.  Since most public places have been shut down in light of the spiking number of Covid cases, a group of bar owners (once again in Austin) organized a grassroots movement called Bar Lives Matter.  In addition to publicly protesting, they plan to sue the governor!  These folk feel they’re being singled out and vilified.  “No other businesses are being shut down.  It’s wrong and affecting the livelihood of hundreds of thousands across the state.”  Not so fast – turns out the governor also shut down numerous rafting and tubing establishments.  Back to the ol’ swimming hole.

After months of being incredibly careful and staying away from virtually all humanity, I’ve thrown the whole wind into the caution and ventured back into the real world.  Well, Provincetown.  While this isn’t the Ptown of yore (or mine), it’s still lovely to get away.  But is it even Provincetown?  Certainly not a typical July 4^th.  But the businesses are making the best of things.  Bars that were unable to open because they don’t serve food suddenly added sandwiches to their menu.  Regardless, all eateries must close by 11PM, at which point the streets basically roll up.  So, while it’s still lovely, don’t judge Ptown by this summer.

Meanwhile, reports indicate that Fire Island is as busy as ever.  One particular person joined in the 4^th celebrations while knowing he had Covid.  I won’t name him or vilify him because, surely he wasn’t the only positive person there.  Many of these vacationers probably have the coronavirus – they just haven’t been tested.  But that doesn’t make them any less contagious.  I simply say what I said during the AIDS crisis – assume everyone is positive and act accordingly.  You can still enjoy your life and be somewhat social while also being safe.

This week, our Ask Billy question comes from Liam in London: “One of the papers here in England talked about a television show somewhere in Europe which featured male strippers from The Full Monty actually going all the way.  Is it true?  And if so, can you find the video?”

You’ve gotta love the Dutch – they gave us wooden shoes, and wood in our shorts.  That is, if you happened to be watching Beau van Erven Dorens’ late-night gabfest, Beau Live.  But, I must correct Liam – the strippers were not appearing in a musical.  They are The Sugar Boys, a strip troupe that performs throughout the low lands with some high entertainment.  They started their routine with “You Can Leave Your Hat On” and segued into “Pony”.  By the time it ended, the foursome had stripped to their “Beau”-emblazoned undies.  You would think that would be the end of it, but then three of the guys decided to go a bit further and doffed their drawers and showed off their cock-ring encased semis – at least they seemed like semis to me.  You can see all on BillyMasters.com.

What is my personal involvement in this story?  I’ll tell you about that on Billy Masters LIVE – which is appropriate for this week because all of my guests are musicians.  On Tuesday, we have David Pevsner and Tom Judson (occasionally known as porn megastar, Gus Mattox).  And on Thursday, we have Sam Harris and Billy Gilman.  Quite interesting pairings on so many levels, so you should definitely tune in – either by clicking on the TV link on BillyMasters.com/TV – or YouTube.com/c/BillyMastersTV.

While you’re online, you might wanna check out last week’s shows.  On Tuesday, we had David Drake on to talk about the online fundraiser for the Provincetown Theater.  Joining us were Charles Busch, who gave David his first big break, and Wesley Taylor, who appeared in the all-star version of The Night Larry Kramer Kissed Me.  On Thursday’s show, we had Frank DeCaro for another discussion about his Drag volume.  This time, we were joined by a trio of amazing performers – Alaska Thunderfuck, Chad Michaels, and Kay Sedia.  I don’t like to play favorites, but I can’t remember a show where I’ve laughed as much.  It was not only educational, but also the most fun I’ve had in a very long time.  If you wanna laugh – and perhaps learn a thing or two – check it out.

Racial issues continue to be news everywhere – even in entertainment.  Tina Fey has asked syndicators to remove several episodes of 30 Rock because they contain instances of blackface.  Scrubs made a similar move.  Kristen Bell will no longer voice the biracial Molly on Central Park, and Jenny Slate will no longer voice Missy on Big Mouth.  I’m sure by the time this column is published, many more instances will join the list.  As usual, the gays were ahead of the curve on this one.  How long have members of the LGBT community wanted gay roles to be played by gay actors?  Which always begs the question – does that mean that only straight actors can play straight roles?  Weren’t we fighting for the freedom to play any role?  And wasn’t colorblind casting about making all roles available to all ethnicities?  It’s almost to the point that a male will have to drop his drawers before being cast as a Jew.  If someone gets to audition those folks, I have an extensive resume and an exhaustive list of recommendations.

By the by, The Dixie Chicks are no longer The Dixie Chicks.  They are now simply The Chicks.  At this rate, might I suggest stocking up on Dixie Cups…just in case.

At the beginning of June, Big Mama Masters showed me a story on the cover of the Boston Globe about the Unity Flag – which, for those of you who don’t know, is a more inclusive Pride flag.  It’s the traditional rainbow flag, but with a triangle on the left side in black, brown, light blue, pink and white, representing people of color as well as trans individuals.  Well, Big Mama thought this was “so pretty” and had such a great message, she wanted me to go online and order her a big one for the front of the house.  I admit, I rolled my eyes – I’m not a flag kinda guy (you should have seen my eyes when the people across the street put up a flagpole for their US flag, illuminated 24/7 by klieg lights).  Here’s the interesting part – today, I noticed that the people down the street (who I don’t believe have a gay person in their household) have installed the Unity Flag on their porch.

You know where you don’t expect to see any kind of Pride flag?  On a federal government building during the reign of El Presidente.  And yet, one overseas embassy had one in front.  Oh, did I mention it was the US Embassy in Moscow?  Yes, there was the traditional Pride flag, flying proudly within spitting distance of Vladimir Putin – and you know he spat when he saw it.  Not only did the US Ambassador to Russia, John Sullivan, sanction the flag, he also posted a photo of it on the embassy’s official Instagram page, saying (in Russian), “Today, the US Embassy in Russia honors the LGBTI Pride Flag during the #PrideFlagDay celebration.”

Last week, Jimmy Kimmel was named as both host and executive producer of the Emmy Awards – assuming there will be an Emmy Awards.  Days later, there was an outcry against him.  Why?  Because 20 years ago, he wore blackface to play basketball star Karl Malone on The Man Show.  Not only are people complaining about the character, but they are calling Kimmel on the carpet for being part of a show that was anti-woman.  It was also noted that another late-night Jimmy – Jimmy Fallon – wore blackface to play Chris Rock on Saturday Night Live.  Fallon immediately apologized.  “I am very sorry for making this unquestionable offensive decision and thank all of you for holding me accountable.”  As for Kimmel, he’s taking the summer off and will employ guest hosts. 

What a roller coaster it was for Black-ish.  Last week, ABC announced that while the sitcom was being renewed, it would return as a midseason replacement in order to make room for a new sitcom – Call Your Mother starring Kyra Sedgwick.  It was a questionable choice in these days of intense racial scrutiny (to say nothing of it happening within 48 hours of Juneteenth).  It didn’t take long for ABC to change their tune.  Black-ish will return in the fall.  The network decided that “it was important to tell these meaningful stories during this moment in time.”

In a move that nobody found controversial, Black-ish star Jenifer Lewis (my Play Mama) will be the recipient of a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame!  The honor, bestowed upon great entertainers by the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce (based on fan petitions) will take place sometime in 2021.  May I recommend July 15^th?

Way back in 2013, an all-star cast assembled in NYC to celebrate the 20^th anniversary of David Drake’s play, The Night Larry Kramer Kissed Me.  The event served as a benefit for Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS, and starred Drake alongside such performers as Anthony Rapp, BD Wong, Robin de Jesús, André De Shields, and Rory O’Malley.  An archival video from that night will be live streamed to raise money for the Provincetown Theater – where Drake is artistic director.  Check out the company’s website of ProvincetownTheater.org on June 28^th.

You can get a taste of David Drake when he joins us this week on Billy Masters LIVE.  The multi-hyphenate Drake, a dear friend of yours truly, will appear on Tuesday, June 23^rd.  But he won’t be alone – no, there will be some surprise guests.  You’ll just have to tune in to find out who.  While we’re tooting our own horn, on Thursday, June 25^th, Frank DeCaro will return to regale us with stories from his encyclopedic volume, Drag: Combing Through the Big Wigs of Show Business.  And he’ll be joined by two legendary performers – Alaska Thunderfuck and Chad Michaels.  Be sure to check out BillyMasters.com/TV, or Billy Masters TV on YouTube.

We just wrapped up another interesting week on Billy Masters LIVE.  On Tuesday, we featured anchormen Thomas Roberts and Steve Kmetko to discuss the changing face of television.  It was fascinating when you consider the three of us span three decades in age, and yet our stories were all remarkably similar.  On Thursday, we had Eddie Shapiro discussing his Broadway book, Nothing Like a Dame, alongside Tony Award winner Levi Kreis.  We talked about where Broadway has been, where it’s going, and what to do with Levi (I dreamt up a few more suggestions the other night).  You can see it all on BillyMasters.com/TV – or YouTube.com/c/BillyMastersTV.

I hope that nobody reads Billy Masters’ column for great insights on race relations.  Last week, my dear friend Jenifer Lewis took me to task in a loving, but firm way.  “Of course you need to be told these things because they’re not part of your background…but you shouldn’t need to be told these things.”  So, whether I should or shouldn’t know everything about racial inequality, I am making an effort.

I’ve been reading with great interest about this Aunt Jemima controversy.  I am old enough to remember seeing the pancake purveyor dressed with a kerchief in her hair.  I also remember 1989, when she got a makeover – the kerchief came off, she put on lipstick and pearl earrings, and kinda resembled Roxie Roker from The Jeffersons.  Once again, Jemima is getting a makeover – she’s being completely erased.  This made me wonder – if they replace a glamorous African-American woman with someone like Ann B. Davis or Shirley Booth, who does that help?  It surely doesn’t help the family of Anna Short Harrington – the lady who portrayed the venerable Aunt from 1935 to 1954.  Anna was the great-grandmother of Larnell Evans Sr., and he’s pissed off.  “This is an injustice for me and my family.  This is part of my history, sir” – one always takes note of someone who uses the word “sir”.  “This woman served all those people…and it was AFTER slavery.  She worked as Aunt Jemima.  That was her job.  How do you think I feel as a Black man sitting here telling you about my family history they’re trying to erase?” 

So I delved deeper and learned about some other famous faces used to purvey products.  Like Uncle Ben.  Didya know he was based on an African-American farmer in Texas who supplied above-average rice to the US military?  The man pictured on the package is Frank Brown, the maitre d’hôtel of an elite Chicago restaurant.  In 2007, the character of Ben was upgraded from a rice grower to the chairman of the board.  Then there’s Frank L. White.  He was born in Barbados and immigrated to the US in 1875.  He achieved such renown as a master chef, he was recruited to become the face of Rastus, the chef on the box of Cream of Wheat.  To me – admittedly a white male of dubious privilege – I see these as iconic symbols to be learned from.  But soon, they’ll all be erased.  Progress.

Remember the coronavirus?  While I continue to wear a mask wherever I go, I see more and more people eschewing the confining accoutrement and simply throwing the wind into the caution.  I was under the impression that the first entertainment venues considering re-opening were cinemas (as if I’d risk life and limb to see the upcoming Russell Crowe release).  Then I read of DL Hughley collapsing onstage.  You may ask – where on God’s green earth is a comedy club open to a live audience?  In Nashville, Tennessee (they’ve apparently been open since May 28^th).  Before I go on, may I say that I mean no disrespect to anyone – but pandemic or no pandemic, you could not pay me to leave my house to see DL Hughley.  During his SECOND show of the evening (he also did two shows the previous night), Hughley paused, leaned on his stool, and collapsed onto the floor.  The capacity audience at Zanies in Nashville was shocked.  That continued the following day when they learned that Hughley – who had only hours before been spewing verbal barbs in their general direction – had also been spewing corona-laden saliva!

Hughley’s set was part of the Juneteenth Social Awareness-Thon, which also featured Snoop Dogg, Anthony Anderson, and others performing from their respective locales.  It was sponsored by Master Growers CBD and was a fundraiser for their Clean Hands for All campaign to provide 1.5 million bottles of hand sanitizer to people in inner cities.  If Nashville wasn’t on that list before, it is now.

Our Ask Billy question comes from James in San Francisco.  “I’ve been hearing about this nude video of Chris Cuomo.  Do you have it?  He’s SO freakin’ hawt.”

According to various sources, the newsman could be seen roaming around naked outside of his house during his wife’s yoga video.  But did it actually happen?  Hard to say.  Said wife does indeed film yoga videos, and they are often shot in front of a large window that looks onto their yard.  But the video in question was allegedly deleted.  However, a still said to have been taken from that installment shows the back of a naked man.  Could it be Chris?  Sure.  Could it be doctored?  Also sure.  I’ll post the photo on BillyMasters.com and you can decide for yourself.

When a tree fell in my neighborhood and nobody heard it (but this someone took a photo), it’s time for me to end yet another column. I must take a moment to remember Bonnie Pointer.  Heaven must have sent her to form The Pointer Sisters.  Eventually she went solo, because Bonnie always marched to the beat of her own drummer. I was fortunate to interview her alongside sisters Ruth and Anita a few months ago.  More recently, I did an extended, emotional interview with Anita Pointer on Billy Masters LIVE.  We’ll post those on YouTube.com/c/BillyMastersTV.  You can find all of our columns and our shows on www.BillyMasters.com – the site that is proud 24/7.  If you have a question, send it along to Billy@BillyMasters.com, and I promise to get back to you before we find a video of Chris Cuomo doing downward dog.  So, until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

Last week, we celebrated 50 years of Pride on Billy Masters LIVE.  Since I co-hosted LA Pride for many years alongside drag legend Momma, it was fitting that she joined me as co-host of this special episode.  Along with various people who worked behind the scenes, Pauley Perrette dropped in to discuss helping out year after year, as did the fabulous Willam.  And our 2008 headliner, the legendary Olivia Newton-John, also showed up.  I was glad to commemorate 50 years of Pride – even virtually.  Another special episode was devoted to the late Joan Rivers.  That one included many people who knew and worked with her, including Jackie Beat, Charles Busch, Dan Glosser, and the greatest of all Joan Rivers impersonators, Frank Marino.  Check out BillyMasters.com/TV – or YouTube.com/c/BillyMastersTV.

This coming week, we celebrate even more history.  In 2015, Thomas Roberts became the first openly gay person to anchor a network evening newscast.  He’s had a fascinating career, so we’re thrilled to have him join Steve Kmetko in a discussion of how the landscape of television has changed over the years.  We will also welcome Levi Kreis, who performed at LA Pride in 2007 and won the Tony Award for Million Dollar Quartet in 2010.  Be sure to tune into Billy Masters LIVE – Tuesdays and Thursdays at 3PM Eastern, Noon Pacific on YouTube.

The subject of trans people, minorities, and sports came together when Olympic skater Adam Rippon announced that he had donated to The Okra Project, a charity benefiting black transgender people.  After news of his donation went public, another Olympian had something to say.  In a now-deleted Instagram photo (which we have on our website), Russian skater Alexei Yagudin wrote, “Fuck, Adam.  When will you die?  Earth’s mistake.”  Rippon, no stranger to criticism or hatred, responded, “Because of that I feel INSPIRED to donate another $1000 to the @TheOkraProject but this time, in his name.”  Perhaps the donation should have been made in rubles.

Then there’s Mitt Romney.  Being a native Bostonian, I have a long history with Mr. Romney.  While I have not agreed with him on many issues, he strikes me as someone who does what he believes is right – even if it may not be what’s right for him.  And he certainly doesn’t pander.  In the recent past, Romney has done more good than most politicians – starting with breaking party lines to impeach El Presidente.  And last week, he marched with Black Lives Matter.  Sure, there’s no way to know if he’s being sincere, but at least he’s doing the right thing.  So just for that, I say bravo, Mitt.  If Joe Biden really wants to make a statement about unity, why not reach across the aisle and ask Romney to be his VP?  Yes, I know he promised to choose a woman.  If Mitt really wants to heal our nation, he could get a teensy little procedure.

Our Ask Billy question comes from Gary in Maine.  “Did you see Jason Derulo as Spiderman?  What is it about him and his penis?  Why is he always showing it off?”

If you had Jason Derulo’s penis, wouldn’t you be showing it off?  In the video, Jason is winched into a snug Spiderman costume, which features something Tobey Maguire never had – a large, cylindrical mass cutting across his nether regions.  Perhaps we should feel sorry for Derulo.  Maybe he’s one of those guys who is simply always hard.  I’ve known men like this – such a burden, as you’ll see on BillyMasters.com.

Then there’s Lea Michele, who I always heard was “difficult”.  Then we heard from Samantha Ware, who appeared on Glee.  In response to a Tweet Lea made last week about standing with the protesters, Ware wrote (in all CAPS, which I will change): “Remember when you made my first television gig a living hell?  Cause Ill never forget.  I believe you told everyone that if you had the opportunity you would ‘shit in my wig’ amongst other traumatic microagressions that made me question a career in Hollywood.”  Similar stories were shared by Amber Riley, Melissa Benoist, Alex Newell, and Willam Belli.  Michele’s response?  “Whether it was my privileged position and perspective that cause me to be perceived as insensitive or inappropriate at times or whether it was just my immaturity and me just being unnecessarily difficult, I apologize for my behavior and for any pain which I have caused.  We can all grow and change and I have definitely used these past several months to reflect on my own shortcomings.”  This sounds kinda like an apology I once gave to a close friend.  “I don’t know what you’re angry about, and I don’t think I did anything wrong.  But I’m sorry you’re upset.”  Thanks…no thanks.

I often feel Meghan McCain is the target of unfair vitriol.  But she most certainly stepped in it.  Last week, The View was on vacation – something which really fucked up my schedule.  It’s hard enough for me to keep track of what day it is.  Eating breakfast without The View only happens on weekends!  After last week’s riots, Megan posted, “My neighborhood in Manhattan is eviscerated and looks like a war zone.”  The first sign that things were not as they appeared was that the Tweet was posted from Virginia!  Then someone Tweeted back: “Meghan, we live in the same building, and I just walked outside.  It’s fine.”  McCain backpedaled (while also doubling down): “I sent a Tweet yesterday based on the news.”  Did she?  She didn’t say, “I hear my neighborhood in Manhattan is eviscerated and looks like a war zone.”  Her initial Tweet was presented as a fact – based on no facts at all.

I have trouble with people who can’t simply say, “Oops, I was wrong – sorry.”  Roger Goodell, commissioner of the NFL, said, “We, the NFL, admit we were wrong for not listening to NFL players earlier and encourage all to speak out and peacefully protest.  We, the NFL, believe black lives matter.  I personally protest with you and want to be part of the much needed change in this country.”  Bravo.

For years, people have whispered that Lindsey Graham is gay.  I can’t say he is or isn’t – I never fucked him (but that’s hardly a litmus test).  The Republican senator from South Carolina was the target of claims initiated by gay porn star Sean Harding.  “There is a homophobic republican senator who is no better than Trump who keeps passing legislation that is damaging to the lgbt and minority communities.  Every sex worker I know has been hired by this man.  Wondering if enough of us spoke out if that could get him out of office?”  Sean then Tweeted, “I cannot do this alone.  If you’d be willing to stand with me against LG please let me know.”  LG stands for “Lady Graham” – allegedly the nickname hookers use for Lindsey.  Harding added that every news network wants to interview him, and high-profile attorneys are offering their services.  If Sean offers his services, I’m in!

Why is this all happening now?  I don’t believe it’s Graham’s support for El Presidente.  Nor do I think it’s his seemingly racist views.  I believe it’s because, for the first time since becoming a Senator (in 2003), he is in danger of losing his job.  Many polls predict that a young, black Democrat could beat Lindsey in November.  Days after this column comes out, South Carolina will have their primary.  When the dust settles, Jaime Harrison will likely be the Democratic nominee.  Some suggest this would not be the first time Graham would be up against a young, black man – but to make such a claim would be beneath me.  It also may not be the first time Graham was beneath a young, black man!

Adding her formidable voice to the fray, Patti LuPone has some advice for Graham.  “On a personal note, why don’t you just bite the bullet and come out?  You might just come to your senses.”  The unmarried Graham has rarely addressed the rumors.  The most he’s ever said was to TMZ – “To the extent that it matters, I’m not gay.”  What about to the extent that it doesn’t matter?

Our Ask Billy question comes from Paul in San Diego.  “Is it true that Steve Grand is designing underwear and swimwear?”

After years of showing off in others’ wares, it’s high time Grand winched himself into his own.  He’s designed a collection of various styles of swimwear, underwear, activewear, and even a thong under the moniker Grand Axis.  Alas, with factories being closed, he has no products to ship out and his hands are tied.  Hmmm…Steve Grand, in a thong, hands tied.  There’s a photo you likely won’t see on BillyMasters.com – but we’ll show off the rest of his assets.

Cheyenne Jackson recently said something that shocked even moi!  The dashing and debonair dude revealed that over the course of 14 years, he’s had FIVE hair transplant procedures.  Not only that, but he posted photos showing the scars!  “I started losing my hair around 22.  My older brother was balding too, but was way braver & cooler & just shaved his off.  It was really emotional for me to watch it fall out & I felt less attractive & truly less like myself as the days went on, so I saved up and got my first surgery at 28.”  That led to several more procedures.  “Why did I care so much?  What does that say about me?  Being a vain actor in an industry that rewards beauty, I vowed to keep this my secret forever.  I feel SO stupid saying that but it’s my truth.”  He would take hair and makeup people aside and share his secret.  Their response?  “Ummm… yeah… so?”  Cheyenne sums it up by saying, “I’m sharing because maybe this will inspire someone out there to share a secret they’ve been hiding, or show a scar that they’ve been afraid of anyone seeing.  Let it go.  What I’ve learned during this pandemic is that shit like this just doesn’t matter.”  Of course, it’s easy for him to say that now with a good head of hair – to say nothing of a career and a hot husband.  Would he feel the same with wisps of hair or a shaved head?  Who knows?  That’s beyond my pay grade.

It was a big week on Billy Masters LIVE!.  Throughout the pandemic, we’ve been doing live shows on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 3PM Eastern (noon Pacific).  Last week, a staggering number of people took a little time to enjoy Billy Masters…LIVE!  Of course, I can’t take all the credit.  On Thursday, two of my favorite funny people were guests – Judy Gold and Wendy Liebman.  But it was Tuesday’s show that really grabbed the fans’ attention.  My guests were Emerson Collins, Blake McIver, and Scott Nevins – who, collectively, possess roughly half my body fat.  They couldn’t have been nicer…or dishier.  Emerson was producing an all-star reading of Del Shores’ Sordid Lives to benefit small theatre companies (you’ve already missed that one); on June 5^th, Scott Nevins will host Voices of Hope: Together We Thrive, a live streaming glittering event to benefit the Desert AIDS Project; the following night, Blake McIver brings his Barbra Streisand tribute concert to the web.  You can find more details and watch the shows on BillyMasters.com/TV or on our YouTube channel.

As to the shows this week, we celebrate my 16^th wedding anniversary to porn superstar, Kurt Young.  We’ll also have Frank DeCaro, who wrote the book, Drag: Combing Through the Big Wigs of Show Business.  Lady Bunny will hop in to talk about her upcoming special.  You never know who’ll pop up on Billy Masters LIVE!

Ever since I came out – in 1986 – Larry Kramer has been saying he’s dying.  34 year later, he did just that.  At the age of 84 (a respectable age for anyone to die), a man who changed the world passed away.  I suspect he didn’t go peacefully – nothing Larry did was peaceful.  He fought to start the Gay Men’s Health Crisis in NYC, he fought to start ACT UP, he fought to get his play The Normal Heart produced, and he fought Barbra Streisand to regain the rights when she couldn’t make a film of the play.  By all accounts, Larry wasn’t an easy person to be around.  But you’d sure want him in your corner when the chips were down.  In a very few short months, we’ve lost three pivotal voices for our community: Larry Kramer, Terrence McNally, and Mart Crowley.  Throw in Jerry Herman and Roy Horn, and you’ve got a mighty dramatic musical with an animal act!  Rest in peace.

One of the people who remembered Larry Kramer was Dr. Anthony Fauci.  Here is an extended quote: “This is a very sad day, not only for me, but for many people who’ve had the opportunity to deal with Larry Kramer.  He was a most unusual figure in a very positive sense.  He was a firebrand.  He had extraordinary courage to speak out and challenge the system that was in place at the time of the early years of HIV/AIDS.  As a government official who was trying to do a job to address this, he saw me as the face of the federal government.  And we became adversaries.  I wasn’t an adversary to him, but boy, he was an adversary to me.  He attacked me, he called me a murderer, he called me an incompetent idiot – I mean publicly.  But then, as I got to listen to what he had to say, I realized that he was making some important points that we in the establishment needed to listen to.  We became, gradually, friends.  And then we became very good friends.  And then we became colleagues in the struggle.  So it turned out that, you know, I loved the guy.  And I think he loved me back.”  Once again, wise words from Dr. Fauci.

Our Ask Billy question comes from Danny in Denver.  “What do you know about Christopher Fawcett?  He’s an underwear model and absolutely gorgeous.”

You didn’t ask, but you’ll probably be pleased to hear that Fawcett is openly gay.  HOORAY!  He’s also openly married.  BOO!  To fill in some other blanks, he’s 34 years old, lives in NYC, and has modeled extensively for DKNY and CK.  But, please, don’t limit Fawcett to undies.  He’s also happy to pose in nothing at all – as you’ll see on BillyMasters.com.

When you’ll need two hands to turn this Fawcett, it’s definitely time to get out the elbow grease and end yet another column.  You may not be stuck at home, but you’ll still need some entertainment.  Might I suggest you check out www.BillyMasters.com – the site that doesn’t require social distancing.  And, of course, go to our YouTube channel of Billy Masters TV and subscribe.  I’ll make it worth your while.  For details on how, drop a note to me at  Billy@BillyMasters.com, and I promise to get back to you before Macy’s opens up a back room.  Until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

Did you all watch Bombshell in Concert?  It was without question one of the most THRILLING things I’ve ever seen.  For those who don’t know, Bombshell was a musical about Marilyn Monroe that was being staged in the NBC series Smash.  After the series was cancelled, fans clamored for a stage version of Bombshell.  This concert performance of that score (written by Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman) was a benefit in 2015 for The Actors Fund – and was fortuitously filmed professionally for archival purposes.  Although it wasn’t televised on NBC (where Smash aired), it was livestreamed on People Magazine’s website – also as a benefit for The Actors Fund (to watch it, click here).  Since it was a benefit, union rules only allowed a week for some vocal and dance rehearsal in a studio, and then a few hours in the theatre the day of the show itself.  Despite this tight schedule – to say nothing of the fact that the concert happened two years after the series’ demise – everything was picture-perfect, including the thrilling choreography of Joshua Bergasse.  The fact that Megan Hilty was effortless was expected from this Broadway vet.  It was Katharine McPhee – at that point, a Broadway newbie – who blew me away.  She handled intricate vocals during difficult dancing with aplomb.  And it’s impossible for me to let a Smash item end without noting the presence of the dreamy Wesley Taylor.

For you Smash/Bombshell fans, I have good news and bad news.  After numerous efforts, coming up with a cohesive book for a Marilyn Monroe musical that would include all of the score has proven impossible.  That’s the bad news.  The good news is that the original producers have announced plans for a musical based on Smash the series, which would retain most of the score.  Should this happen, it could mean that there would be two Marilyn Monroe-centric musicals on Broadway at the same time – both written by Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman.  The duo has also written a musical version of Some Like It Hot, which is set for a Broadway bow in 2021.

You know who has given up?  Lori Loughlin and Mossimo Giannulli.  You’ll recall that Lori and Mossimo were implicated in Operation Varsity Blues, where parents tried to buy their kids’ way into colleges.  The Loughlin-Giannullis spent roughly half a MILLION dollars to get their dippy daughters into USC.  Although I don’t care about them, I’d really enjoy seeing Lori and Moss serve considerable jail time.  After all, they pleaded not guilty repeatedly (versus Felicity Huffman, who quickly admitted guilt, apologized, did her time, and moved on).  The couple also unsuccessfully tried to get the case thrown out of court – going so far as to force the FBI to disclose whatever evidence they had.  When the Feds revealed text messages and photos, the couple suddenly changed their tune.  Too little, too late, if you ask me.  Throw the book at them – preferably a book that’s been sitting in a crowded supermarket for a while.

Time for a Whodunit!  Ruby Rose, who plays the title character in Batwoman, abruptly quit the CW show days after the show was picked up for a second season.  The producers vow to recast!  Why is Ruby leaving?  Lots of rumors are circulating – including one about her being injured during a stunt and deciding she wasn’t going to risk permanent physical damage.  But people whisper that’s not the real reason.  Allegedly there was a “personality conflict”.  Between whom?  My sources are mum, but I’m not one to give up that easily.

Our Ask Billy question comes from Chris in Pennsylvania: “Who is Matt Goss?  I think I read about him in your column.  Did you see the photos of him wearing a cock sock?  He looks enormous.”

Matt was a member of the UK pop group Bros, and has since been a solo artist, with a residency in Las Vegas (and, yes, we know each other).  He’s also mighty hot and obviously a fitness fanatic.  As to the cock sock, here’s what happened.  Matt was a guest on the UK chat show, Celebrity Juice.  During a game, he was dared to play the guitar naked.  He retreated to his room, and returned brandishing a guitar which covered his genitals.  Fellow panelist Mel B. insisted on proof that Matt was nude.  At that point, Goss lifted his guitar to show his rod and staff snugly ensconced in a rather thick tube sock.  You can see all on BillyMasters.com.

Last week’s installments of Billy Masters LIVE were amongst my favorites.  But the week got off to a rocky start.  Hours before Tuesday’s show, a guest cancelled.  At the last minute, Alec Mapa jumped in to save the day.  I then invited Bruce Vilanch and Jackie Beat to join in the fun, and what fun it was!  Speaking of fun, Broadway diva Faith Prince was a dream of a guest.  I knew she was brilliantly talented and delightfully daffy – but I had no idea we’d get deep into the minutiae of her career and craft.  A really fascinating interview.  Being joined by drag diva and vocalist extraordinaire Randy Roberts certainly didn’t hurt!  I surprised them both with buddy John McDaniel, who even sang a song for Prince.  Great shows continue on our YouTube channel at Billy Masters TV.

Here’s a brief plug about this week’s shows.  Many of you Broadway buffs know all the drama surrounding the musical Seesaw.  Both original star Lainie Kazan and her replacement – and best friend – Michele Lee have discussed this openly.  But they’ve never sat down and talked about it together…until now.  A Billy Masters Exclusive.  And on Thursday, we have a stack of questions for legal eagle Gloria Allred – including why we were photographed dancing – and why she let me dip her!  Find out Thursday…on Billy Masters LIVE (easily accessible on BillyMasters.com/TV).

Some stories I avoid reporting – I assume they’re old news to most readers.  And then people think I missed something.  So, here goes.  You all know that Hamilton has been the biggest hit on Broadway for the past five years.  While Lin-Manuel Miranda and the rest of the original cast were in the show, they filmed three performances and edited them down to one fabulous film – LIVE!  Disney paid $75 million for the rights, and planned to release it in 2021.  In light of the current crisis, they’ve opted to release it on Disney+ on the eve of Independence Day, July 3^rd.

If you need your fix of musical theatre, go online to see a plethora of musical talent assembled for the finale from Hairspray.  Dozens of luminaries took part in a brilliant rendition of “You Can’t Stop the Beat”.  Eagle eyes will notice several stars who have also popped up on Billy Masters LIVE, particularly two notable Motormouth Mabels – Jenifer Lewis and Darlene Love.  By the way, Jenifer recorded her section moments after appearing on my show – which would explain why she’s in the same outfit!  Yes, #BML always gets everything first.

Quarantining makes for some strange bedfellows.  For instance, who knew that two of Broadway’s Evan Hansens are dating?  Yes, we’re talking about the original star, Ben Platt, and his successor, Noah Galvin.  You remember Noah – he’s the one who was on that short-lived sitcom that owes part of its swift demise to that vitriolic interview he gave to Vulture.  As part of Galvin’s redemption tour, he took over the lead in Dear Evan Hansen on Broadway and made quite an impression on people…including Platt.  On a podcast, Noah said, “Ben and I are dating.  I asked him this morning.  I was like, ‘Are we allowed to talk about this?’  And he’s like, ‘Don’t go into our nitty gritty, but yeah, people can know.’”  On behalf of my readers – we actually enjoy the nitty, to say nothing of the gritty.  The couple are quarantining together – along with a female Broadway performer.

Adding to the incestuousness, Ben and Noah are not the only Dear Evan Hansen alums to have hooked up.  After Noah Galvin left the show, he was replaced by Taylor Trensch.  Taylor is now dating his understudy, Ben Levi Ross – who in turn led the national tour.  So, to all my single readers out there, here is my advice – get cast in a Broadway show.  I know that seems a daunting task, but frankly, so is dating!

Our Ask Billy question comes from Terry in Chicago.  “Did you see those photos of Lil Nas X in his hot tub?”

I must confess I didn’t know anything about Lil Nas X’s hot tub photos until you mentioned them.  Were they steamy?  Sure, in that hot tub way.  But they weren’t as hot as the full-frontal nudes we have on BillyMasters.com.

When I have to worry about the coronavirus and tigers, it’s time for me to end yet another column.  And didn’t I hear that someone allegedly caught it from a tiger?  You don’t think…do you?  While I look into this, you should check out www.BillyMasters.com – the site where you can read gossip and watch some great original programming.  If you have a question, send it along to Billy@BillyMasters.com, and I promise to get back to you before Lil Nas posts photos of himself in a hot tub…with a tiger!  Until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

Despite the restrictions, underground gay dance parties appear to still be going on.  Some industrious New Yorkers put together an invitation-only soirée where neither masks nor clothes were required.  How did we find out about it?  Because one of the attendees, Argentinean porn star Ian Frostok, thought it was a good idea to post 50+ Instagram Stories from the event!  In doing so, he also got the people photographed in hot water – including DJ Alec Brian (who claims he only took the gig to pay his rent).  Since the scandal, both Ian and Alec have deactivated their Instagram accounts.  With this level of intelligence, I’m surprised they aren’t working for the US government.

And like me, many people have come up with inventive ways to keep people entertained.  I was tickled when I read that a restaurant in Michigan City, Indiana, hired drag queens to deliver food for curbside pickup.  Fiddlehead Restaurant calls it “Dragside Pickup”!  Before anyone accuses them of cultural appropriation (a term I find revolting), Fiddlehead is an LGBTQ-owned establishment.

If any of you are were thinking the coronavirus would be under control anytime soon, think again.  A month ago, LA Pride was rescheduled to Labor Day weekend.  Last week, plans changed and it’s now gonna be a virtual event.  Then, the city of West Hollywood cancelled the Halloween Carnaval due to concerns about the second wave.

“Billy, you are a new find of mine.  I’m now your biggest fan.” 
– Paul Shaffer – yes, THAT Paul Shaffer – after showing up to surprise my guest, the legendary Darlene Love. 
Yet another typical episode of Billy Masters LIVE!.

You know what hasn’t been cancelled?  Billy Masters LIVE.  As you saw in the opening quote, Paul Shaffer (from The Late Show with David Letterman) stopped by to surprise my special guest, Darlene Love.  If you had told me I’d have either of these people on my show, I never would have believed you.  We were also joined by beloved songwriter, Marc Shaiman.  That show had a whole lotta musical folks surrounding a whole lotta love.  With a good helping of gossip – ‘cause that’s what we do!  Check out our YouTube channel at Billy Masters TV.

On another show, I was joined by journalist Sue O’Connell to chat with legendary diver Greg Louganis.  I surprised him with fellow Olympic diver, Kent Ferguson.  That show had a whole lotta abs!  Didya know Greg Louganis has been DYING to be on Dancing with the Stars?  And yet they’ve passed on him – even for the season devoted to athletes!  And yet, DWTS has found room for such luminaries as Jerry Springer, Buzz Aldrin, and Master P.  We also unearthed the audition video Greg and Kent made for The Amazing Race – another show they haven’t appeared on.  But they both appeared with me – as you can see on BillyMasters.com/TV.

Another show that kinda wrapped things up was Will & Grace.  As with their previous series finale, they foisted a baby storyline on us.  Why is it that everyone thinks the only way for gays to be happy is to be in a relationship or have a child?  Of course, you can’t go by me – I’m sitting here typing alone, naked, drinking vodka, and eating my body weight in expired peppermint bark!  The W&G producers kinda confirmed the tension between Debra Messing and Megan Mullally saying, “It was not an easy year.”  They do, however, credit Messing for getting the finale shot before everything shut down.  “Thank God Debra had it in her contract that we had to be done by Christmas.  I finally found the silver lining in that really pain-in-the-ass clause,” said producer Max Mutchnick.

In case anyone needs further confirmation, I noted that on Jess Cagle’s SiriusXM show dedicated to the finale, we only got three-quarters of the cast.  No Mullally.

It was a big week on Billy Masters LIVE.  Tuesday’s show featured legendary designer Bob Mackie and Anita Pointer of the fabulous Pointer Sisters.  We had a lot of fun looking at some of his amazing designs for the sisters and reminiscing about the good ole days.  But when I went one-on-one with Anita, she opened up about some tragic situations she’s lived through in recent years, culminating with her leaving the trailblazing group under less than amicable circumstances.  It’s a raw, vulnerable discussion, and the first time she’s discussed these things in detail.

On Thursday’s show, we dished the dirt with Michael Musto and laughed with singer Roslyn Kind.  Once alone, Roz and I talked about her recent tour with sister Barbra Streisand, and her very personal connection with The Trevor Project, the nation’s only 24/7 LGBTQ suicide prevention hotline.  If you’ve missed any of these great shows, check them all out on our YouTube Channel or simply go to BillyMasters.com/TV.  Coming up this week, the greatest diver of all time, Greg Louganis, and the legendary Darlene Love.  You can also expect some surprises.

Meghan McCain has often discussed how she holds former View co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck in high esteem.  That said, she took issue with how Lizzy was handling the early days of the coronavirus.  During an appearance on The View last month, Elisabeth said, “We’re going to Purell, pray that God’s got us in our tomorrows, right?  We pray that this coronavirus is extinguished, that it’s stopped in its tracks.  I think we should prepare.  I think we should pray.  I’m not going to let coronavirus rule me.”  On Watch What Happens Live, Meghan said, “I think it’s really REALLY unfortunate and dangerous that she said that.  I don’t need to co-host with her again, and it’s unfortunate because I’ve been a huge fan of her a long time and anyone who’s screwing around with this virus and putting out misinformation – I just don’t have a lot of time for right now.”  Needless to say, Hasselbeck didn’t take this particularly well and took to social media and said (in part): “Meghan – I am going to call you and handle this in the best socially distanced direct manner possible – but hey girl – We are all just doing our best, and I don’t know why you are taking an opportunity to be so aggressive towards me during such a stressful time.” 

You’ve got to get up pretty early to surprise me with a story.  Actually, you only need to be up before 1PM!  Still, I was surprised to hear that Anderson Cooper had a boy – and I don’t mean “had a boy” in that icky way.  He actually sired a child…via surrogate (there’s only so many surprises I can take).  The silver fox announced that after years of being called a “Daddy”, he was an actual daddy to Wyatt Morgan Cooper.  “On Monday, I became a father.  I never actually said that before out loud, and it still kind of astonishes me.  I’m a dad.  I have a son, and I want you to meet him,” Cooper said as he showed a photo to his international audience.

As if that wasn’t enough, reports indicate that Anderson reunited with his ex-beau, Benjamin Maisani.  The two split up in 2018 amidst reports of certain indiscretions.  We hear that Anderson was on the dad train well before the reconciliation, and he’s taking things slowly with Ben.  According to US Weekly, “Ben is selling one of his clubs and cutting back on how much he does at night so he can spend more time at home with Anderson and the baby.”  It’s kinda easy to cut back on club work when all the clubs are closed.  But it’s the thought that counts.

Many people are giving Andy Cohen credit for inspiring Coop to become a dad, but he’s working towards a more lasting legacy.  After recovering from Covid-19, Andy was shocked to learn that gay males are unable to donate blood plasma.  “I was told that due to antiquated and discriminatory guidelines by the FDA to prevent HIV, I am ineligible to donate blood because I’m a gay man.”  Cohen added, “There have been great strides in testing for HIV since these rules were enacted.  You can get an HIV test in 20 minutes.”  He’s advocating for a change in the laws.

While many asked me about this, our Ask Billy question comes from someone here at Billy Masters Multimedia.  Aaron in Texas wrote, “Please tell me you have the uncensored photo of Ansel Elgort in the shower.”

For those of you who don’t get out much – which is all of us these days – lemme explain.  Little Ansel (we’ll get to that) wanted to raise money for Brooklyn for Life – an organization that helps restaurants provide 75-100 meals per day to Brooklyn frontline workers.  On Instagram, he posted a photo of himself in the shower…naked!  Of course, he censored his nether regions.  To see all, you had to join an OnlyFans page, and the money would go to the charity.  Clever, right?  Not clever enough.  Instagram took down the censored photo…but not before Ansel raised over $300K!  So, Aaron was asking whether I could find the uncensored photo.  Ask and you shall receive.  I hasten to add that whatever Ansel was covering is roughly the size of his thumb – which perhaps is enormous.  I was amused to learn that Elgort had his father take the photo.  “Ansel clearly has a very different relationship with his dad than I had with mine,” said Aaron.  You can see the photo on BillyMasters.com.

When we’re questioning Ansel and Tom’s daddy issues, it’s definitely time to end yet another column.  What a week!  Lots of cutting – and Demi Lovato nowhere in sight!  But that cutting Billy Masters humor is always on display, both in print and on the air.  Check out Billy Masters LIVE on YouTube at 3PM Eastern every Tuesday and Thursday.  Of course, my written barbs can be found at www.BillyMasters.com – the site the site where a picture is worth a thousand words.  Send your questions along to Billy@BillyMasters.com, and I promise to get back to you before Colton and Cooper cut each other!  Until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

Last week was a big week for haircuts.  First, Colton Haynes took to the web, saying “Here’s my attempt at making a YouTube video…pls don’t try this at home kids haha.”  Clippers in hand, he said, “We’re gonna do a haircut today.  I’m not a professional hair stylist, so don’t call this a tutorial at all.  Don’t do this at home, kids.”  He might consider shaking up his catchphrase.  As to his skill, I don’t anticipate a career at Supercuts.  But you can see the clip here – and, again, remind you not to try this at home, kids.

There must have been something in the water, because Anderson Cooper also attempted a self-cut.  As with Colton, Coop was not particularly successful, as he explained to Sanjay Gupta.  “I’m hoping you make a tutorial about how to give yourself a haircut, because last night I took a razor and buzzed my head and I gave myself a giant bald spot over here, which I find very…I missed.” We’ll post that, too.  You can see it here.

Meanwhile, everything’s smooth sailing at another talk show – Billy Masters LIVE.  We finally had the episode you’ve all been waiting for – Billy Masters and Jenifer Lewis.  To say we fulfilled your expectations would be presumptuous on my part.  But since I started doing yoga, I’m now able to toot my own horn.  We laughed, we sang, we showed videos of Miss Lewis performing (with and without me), and we were joined by some special guests.  Director, choreographer, dancer, actor, and ageless beauty Jerry Mitchell surprised his old college friend.  So did Mark Alton Brown, who not only went to college with them but also wrote the script for Jackie’s Back.  Obviously we had to perform a scene from the cult classic – and were joined by esteemed songwriter, Marc Shaiman.  In this 90-minute marathon show, you got to see the real Jenifer (and, consequently, the real Billy).  And, see it you must – on Billy Masters TV at YouTube.

We also did a show about After Forever – a web series you should check out (it’s available for free on Amazon Prime).  Co-creator and star Kevin Spirtas was joined by co-star Mitchell Anderson on Billy Masters LIVE, and we had an interesting chat about gay men of a certain age, the coming-out process, and the landmark of making an award-winning series in the digital age.  Once again, I had a surprise guest in Bill Brochtrup, who appears in the second season of the series.  All of my shows are available on our YouTube channel, or BillyMasters.com/TV.

On Tuesday, April 28^th, our guests will be legendary designer Bob Mackie and original Pointer Sister, Anita Pointer!

Let’s start with the elephant in the room – and trust me when I say it ain’t no elephant.  As we were going to press, “someone” online was making a very big deal about a certain video in which two divers were seen making out.  First – I have the video.  When these things leak, we all get them.  It’s of UK diver Tom Daley kissing US diver Tyler Downs.  Downs is kinda a young Tom Daley – and who thought that was even possible?  Downs is 16 and, in an ironic twist, has stated that his favorite diver is…wait for it….Jack Laugher!!!  Who is Jack Laugher?  Another British diver!  In fact, Laugher won a synchronized diving event with Tom Daley back in 2012!  Oh, diving is an incestuous business – and I say this as a former award-winning diver myself (OK, all I won was my high school letter, but still…).

In the video, Downs and Daley are at an event in a hotel room where they’re both shirtless.  Again, as a former diver, let me tell you that swimmers and divers are far more UNcomfortable when they have to put on clothes.  As to the kiss, it has all the passion of kissing your mum – which, unless you are from certain Southern states, is not very.  Not even a scintilla of spit is shared.  To my expert eyes, the term I’d use is “clenched”.  So, if “someone” feels compelled to pass it along “to the authorities”, I have one thing to say – bitch, please!

However, it has led to renewed speculation about the relationship of Tom Daley and Dustin Lance Black.  Is there any evidence that they have an “open relationship”?  None that I’m aware of.  Sure, there was some dallying prior to their marriage.  But if it doesn’t bother them, it doesn’t bother me.  Others have issues with a 25-year-old kissing a 16-year-old.  Hey, what do I know – Tom was 18 years old when he started dating the 38-year-old Dustin Lance Black, and nobody was bothered by that.  You can go to BillyMasters.com and decide for yourself.

Our Ask Billy question comes from Kurt in Phoenix.  “Is Dan Renzi [from The Real World Miami] now a nurse?  There was someone who kinda looked like him on with Rachel Maddow last week.”

Yup, that was him.  Since his time on MTV back in 1996, Dan has gone through a plethora of professions, until he stumbled upon what he really wanted to do – help people.  He’s been a nurse for almost a decade and has most recently been living in Kansas.  However, the moment NYC became ground zero and the need for healthcare workers became dire, he immediately uprooted himself and went to pitch in.  Some of the experiences he related to Maddow were sobering.  “If you told me that not too many years after I graduated that I would be living in a hotel in New York while I was putting bodies in body bags because this mysterious virus was mowing down everybody’s grandparents…how do you process that?”  Again, the new normal.

While I’m riding out the pandemic in Boston, Prince Harry and Meghan are in Los Angeles.  And they’re actually pitching in.  The royal twosome volunteered at Project Angel Food, which prepares and delivers food to homebound people who are either medically or financially in need.  Harry and Meg volunteered in the kitchen on Easter Sunday and then returned on Wednesday to deliver meals in person.  We’re told the idea was Meghan’s, who wanted to show Harry LA through her eyes.  The organization’s executive director said, “They were extremely down to earth and genuinely interested in every single person they met.”  Since I know you’re wondering, they delivered 20 meals.  That may not sound like a lot, but lemme ask you a question – how many meals have you delivered?  So, good on them.  If you’d like to make a donation, check out AngelFood.org.

Here’s what I get out of all the Aaron Schock criticism – you’re all jealous of his looks, his body, and the people he sleeps with.  I have a hunch if I asked any of you to get specific about your gripes with his politics, it would be a mighty short list.  Yes, he’s quarantining in a fancy-schmanzy Mexican resort with a group of hot gay boys.  And, yes, it does kinda look like he’s on the set of a Bel Ami flick with six guys all named Vaclav! And, yes, one of those hot gays with single-digit body fat is paying all the bills.  Jealous?  I think I can answer that – yes.  Do any of us really care if he’s quarantining or not?  No.  Do we care if he’s wearing a medical-grade mask or the mask from Eyes Wide Shut?  No.  I am, however, perfectly content to drift off to sleep picturing Schock as a human Lazy Susan.  So let go of the jealousy.  And if you’d like to see every inch of that Lazy Susan (especially when it’s aroused), check out BillyMasters.com.  You’re welcome.

20 April 2020

“Who’s ‘They’?  We were writing the show.  He did that. 
He did everything…including write the scene probably!” 
– Fran Drescher on Billy Masters LIVE when I asked who cast her at-the-time straight
husband Peter Marc Jacobson as a gay actor on The Nanny.  Why’d he play the role? 
Check out BillyMasters.com/TV – the answer may surprise you.

Week three of Billy Masters LIVE has been a banner one.  It kicked off with our very own Judy Gold and Varla Jean Merman.  Let me warn you – while Varla was in full regalia, Gold was deathly ill and had just come from being tested for Covid-19.  And yet, the show was hysterically funny, while also filled with great insights.

On Thursday, we had the fabulous Fran Drescher!  You may have noticed, I’m only booking people I personally know and like.  So if you ever wondered what Fran is really like, check out this episode.  She’s everything you want her to be…and more.  The stories we got – it was like friends chatting in her living room (which we kinda were).  To top things off, I surprised her with even more people she loves, including her ex-husband Peter Marc Jacobson, her first agent, Dan Guerrero, her attorney, Mark Sendroff, and the incomparable Lainie Kazan (who has played both her mother and her aunt).  To get every drop of the tea we spilled, watch the full show at BillyMasters.com/TV.

Speaking of spilling tea, you know that Jenifer Lewis is one of my best friends.  And she’ll be on Billy Masters LIVE on Tuesday, April 21^st.  Needless to say, the opinions of Miss Lewis are hers alone and are no reflection on Billy Masters Multimedia.  The one thing I can promise is that it’ll be memorable.  You won’t wanna miss this!

Some people in lockdown are coming up with ingenious ways to pass the time.  Take Tori Spelling.  The former starlet has offered fans a chance to join a live video conference with her.  Isn’t that nice?  Ah, but there’s a catch – the virtual meet-and-greet comes with a $95 price tag.  I’m torn – on one hand, who the hell does Tori Spelling think she is?  Cher?  Celine Dion?  Donny and Marie?  On the other hand, if people are willing to pay it, what does it matter to me?  Sure, Billy Masters LIVE is free…but not everyone is as, shall we say, accommodating to their fans (especially the black, married fans).  On the positive side, Tori’s meetings are on Wednesdays at 4PM EST – so she’s not conflicting with me, should we happen to share any fans.  Spelling’s hubby, Dean McDermott, came to her defense.  “All the studios, everything is shut down.  She has no way to work like everybody else.  She has no job to go to.”  That’s all true.  But, really, you can’t blame Tori’s career on the coronavirus..

Families have either thrived or faltered during quarantine.  Let’s look at the Consuelos/Ripa household.  Kelly Ripa revealed to co-host Ryan Seacrest that two of her three kids are not talking to her.  Correction – she is not talking to them.  Why?  Because they won’t hug her.  “I haven’t gotten to hug my parents.  I want to hug my parents.  I miss hugging my parents.  And my kids, like, won’t hug me.  And I’m like, ‘Guys, we’ve all been in lockdown together.  We’re fine.  You can give me a hug.  It’s fine.’”  Ryan offered to hug Ripa – or was it Consuelos?  Perhaps he’d hug another member of the quarantined family whom he might have bumped into online…if you catch my drift.