“I want to know how come Streisand was up there doing
that for Redford.  She only made one movie with him –
I made four!  I have more to say.” 
– Jane Fonda vents about the tribute to Robert Redford at the Oscars.
She’s correct, but there’s one difference – Barbra appears in public less
often than Punxsutawney Phil.  Fonda is out several times a week.

Where to begin?  I guess we should start with the big story of the week – Liza’s memoir is out.  In the preface, Michael Feinstein writes, “Liza is a genius of manipulation.”  If that’s the case, this book is her masterpiece.  I should probably say “his” masterpiece.  After all, it says right on the cover “As told to Michael Feinstein”.  Believe it or not, there are people out there who think Liza sat down with a pencil and legal pad and wrote this book.  There are others who don’t believe she could hold a pencil!  But there’s no pretense – Liza told Michael stories, he wrote them down (or recorded them).  Then, writers Josh Getlin and Pulitzer Prize winner Heidi Evans wrote it.  And they are all credited.  No slight of hand or shenanigans here.

Let’s go to the debacle that was her book event in Los Angeles last week at the Million Dollar Theatre (fun fact – The Gumm Sisters performed there in 1930).  For $225, you got admission, two books, and a 48-minute show (there were a handful of $90 tickets – they only got one book).  Well, “show” is probably the wrong word.  Let’s call it what it was – a spectacle.  There were gay boy dancers, there was a woman in tights and a top hat, there were clips, there was razzamatazz.  After a flash of fire, two dancers clumsily turned a banner around and pushed forward Liza in a director’s chair.  You know those photos on Space Mountain when people look like they are plummeting to their death?  That’s the look Liza had as her chair spun around in front of a capacity crowd.  She rambled, she guffawed, she lost track of stories, she made loads of mistakes.  Feinstein would try to get her back on track for a heavily prepared punchline.  Sometimes she landed it.  Sometimes she appeared bewildered.  Throughout the show, she was slumped in her chair looking like she could slide off at any minute.  She blames it on “my rotten spine”.  The most ill-advised moment was when she “sang” a bit of “Our Love Is Here To Stay” (seen on BillyMasters.com).  And then it was over.  Some people kvelled that they saw a star.  Others were concerned for her well-being.  And others simply called it “sad”.  Within hours, a similar event in NYC was cancelled due to “illness”.  I can’t see her flying cross-country.  Strike that – I can’t see her getting through TSA!

Given his prominence as ringmaster of the events and billing in her memoir, people point their accusatory fingers at Michael Feinstein.  The terms “enabler”, “opportunist”, and “elder abuse” are bandied about as frequently as praise for him standing by her side and trying to protect.  One insider told me, “This is what’s keeping her going…She wants it very badly.”  The rationale being it would be so much worse if Feinstein weren’t around.  Perhaps, but sometimes the best thing you can do for someone is to tell them no.