Trouble on Big Brother

Our next story concerns a blanket, a vagina, a gay dwarf, and an ice cream scooper.  Sounds like the start of a joke, but it’s no laughing matter to Big Brother.  JC Mounduix – the first contestant of diminutive stature to be cast on the show – ran around brandishing an ice cream scooper and sexually harassing houseguests.  He first went up to Kaycee with the scooper and said, “Open up your vagina” – words which I’m sure made Mrs. Moonves’ blood turn cold.  After being rebuffed, he turned his attention to Kaitlyn and reached under her blanket with the scooper (yes, we have the footage).  He later cupped Tyler’s genitals.  Why the hell aren’t I watching this show?

Then two of the female houseguests (Angela and Rachel) were accused of using racially offensive language when they said “ghetto” in reference to their skin color.  Rachel also compared her tan to the color of African-American housemate Bayleigh’s skin.  Apparently that was too much for CBS.  “Big Brother is a reality show about watching a group of people who have no privacy 24/7 – and capturing every unfiltered moment and conversation of their lives.  At times, the houseguests reveal prejudices and exhibit behavior that we do not condone.  The producers have addressed two such incidents that were seen recently on the 24/7 online feed.  In both cases, those involved have been warned about their inappropriate behavior and offensive comments, as well as future consequences.  These events will not be part of any future Big Brother broadcast on CBS.”  Nonetheless, the day after the “zero tolerance” statement, Kaitlyn used the n-word while quoting a Drake song – as one does when locked up on national television!  As of this writing, all houseguests and ice cream scoopers remain in the house.


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