Strictly Come Bulging

Same-sex dancing partners have been commonplace for much longer on the UK’s Strictly Come Dancing.  This season brings us Layton Williams – known in the UK from many TV and West End productions.  His partner is the delicious Nikita Kuzmin – who is straight, but we’re not holding that against him (he also gets blonder every week).  Their dances have routinely been showstoppers.  It’s certainly been a banner season for Nikita, who got to open a recent show paired with fellow pro, the stunning Vito Coppola, in a mesmerizing same-sex love story set to “Something Just Like This”.  It brought down the house.  Kuzmin was born in Ukraine and raised in Italy (where he trained alongside Coppola).  When his parents showed up to see him in the studio, he got choked up.  “In the end, I’m just a kid from Ukraine who’s just living his dream.”  Clips can be found on our website.


All this chit-chat about Strictly was sparked by an Ask Billy question worthy of answering in print.  Jared from London asks: “Are you watching Strictly?  What do you think of Bobby?  I’m sure you saw his package on the Halloween episode.  It’s made all the papers here.”

Now you’ve got my attention, and I tuned in.  Bobby Brazier is a 20-year-old, mop-topped, lanky lad best known for his role on the UK soap EastEnders.  He is the son of a contestant on the 2003 edition of Big Brother UK…so he was basically born into reality television.  In the Halloween episode, his pants weren’t extraordinarily tight.  But as the dance went on, a large, bulbous mass worked its way against his left thigh.  It was so distracting that Shirley Ballas (Mark’s mum) seemed speechless.  Even the typically unflappable Craig Revel Horwood appeared somewhat flapped.  He kept his comments to the dancing, but added, “Is there anything that bottom of yours can’t do?”  According to all the media reports, the BBC was flooded with phone calls.  Most were in favor of the bouncing bulge, while there were a few dissenters.  You can check it out for yourself on  


When we’re topping the leaderboard with someone’s bottom, we’ve definitely come to the end of yet another column.  I should mention that Brazier danced to “Come On-a My House”.  But not the Rosemary Clooney version.  This rendition was sung by Della Reese.  Who knew?  For more useless bits and bobs, check out – the site that’ll give you more than candy.  If you have a question, dash it off to and I promise to get back to you before I plan my next trip to the UK.  So, until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.


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