I am not a devotee of Big Brother but, I must confess, I got hooked when my pals Marissa Jaret Winokur and Ross Mathews competed on Celebrity Big Brother last year.  When I saw this year’s crop of “celebrities”, I knew I’d tune in.  After week one, here are my thoughts.  First, in what other group would Ryan Lochte be considered “the brains”?  I was perplexed when he kept talking about wanting to evict Diana.  Who the hell is Diana?  Turns out, he meant Dina – as in Lohan!  Then Ryan formed a ride-or-die alliance with our own Jonathan Bennett – who ultimately took the fall for Lochte’s bad decisions.  But here’s the most important thing I learned – who knew Bennett has a severe issue with flatulence?  That’s the real value of these shows.  Sitting at home, you think you’d want to be Bennett’s boyfriend.  But I bet after one night of him farting away in bed, you’d be done!  The nightly After Dark edition of the show frequently finds the celebs playing endless hours of poker.  When Ryan described Jonathan’s hand as a “possible straight”, Bennett quipped, “Not since college”.  Bada-bing!