Colton Guided Out

Colton Underwood is gay.  This, of course, is no surprise to any of my loyal readers.  Way back in September of 2018, I quoted Colton’s tearful farewell to Bachelor in Paradise: “I just honestly feel there’s something wrong with me, ‘cause I’ve never wanted something as bad as I wanted it to work.  I want somebody I’m gonna spend the rest of my life with.  I really did give it my all, I really did try.  I don’t deserve her.  I’m broken.”  I followed that up with, “You’re not broken…you’re just…”  I honestly believe that the last person to know Colton was gay was Colton.  Sure, he had those feelings since high school.  But given his background, he fought it – and even attempted suicide.  So, his finally coming out is a good thing.

What most people don’t know is how these things get orchestrated.  His coming out interview with Robin Roberts is a major storyline for a new Netflix reality show, which has been in production for weeks.  On said show, he’ll be “guided” (their word) by Gus Kenworthy – and I think we all know where that’ll end up.  Many gay men have voiced their dissent.  I suspect jealousy plays a part – Colton is attractive, has some money, has been on TV, and now is getting paid to sleep with a bunch of hot guys.  Or am I projecting?  BTW, he “wrote” a book that came out last March called, ironically enough, The First Time: Finding Myself and Looking for Love on Reality TV.  The paperback edition was released a few weeks ago, and the cover promised “With a New Afterword”.  It’s amazing how out of date a book can become in a matter of days.

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Someone doing an about-face (or flipping another part of his anatomy) is Billy Eichner.  When Colton was The Bachelor, Eichner appeared on that show saying, “I’m gay.  I know that’s a shock, Colton…Maybe you’re the first gay Bachelor and we don’t even know!”   Of course, Colton laughed – in that way he wouldn’t have if Kenworthy were making the quip (not that I think he could land that joke).  Billy has since apologized for the barb in light of Colton coming out – and because, you know, Colton’s hot.

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