I’m writing to you from a plane, sitting between two (ostensibly) heterosexual men.  Having nothing to do, my first thought was to watch some gay porn.  Instead, I did something even gayer.  I turned on the last two episodes of Dancing with the Stars!  I think my reasons for not watching this show and The Bachelor are well documented.  However, if that former Bachelor, Joey Graziadei, isn’t a ringer, then I don’t know who is.  This is someone who moves like a professional dancer…and I know this because for several seasons I was “dating” half of the Boston Ballet.  I also question whether this Bachelor has interest in anyone female…but that’s another story (we learned he’s a former cheerleader).  Obviously I have a fondness for hometown boy Danny Amendola, and I can’t fault him for showing off that body!  As for some behind-the-scenes gossip, I hear that one of the pros was told to lose weight or their contract would not be renewed.  Speaking of scuttlebutt (and what a butt it is), rumor has it that another pro on the show is itching to come out.  Problem is, it could ruffle a few feathers.  Lastly, on their tribute to Soul Train, is it just me or did Dwight Howard bear a striking resemblance to Sheryl Underwood from The Talk?

By the by, didya know that prior to going on DWTS, Joey got something called armpit Botox!  An alleged expert says, “Botox in the underarms treats hyperhidrosis and helps reduce pit stains.  It makes sure Joey stays sweat free on DWTS”.  The more you know…