Every once in a while, someone asks me about Calvin Klein’s former beau, Nick Gruber (no relation).  I seem to recall him being arrested after some out-of-control house party.   And I think there were a few brushes with the law that led to assault and drug charges.  But that was eons ago.  And then, poof, as if a gift from the gods, I looked up and saw him on TV.  No, he didn’t have a juicy role to sink his teeth into.  He was on the news – and the news wasn’t good.  It was a story about an older gay couple who lived in Santa Rosa, California.  During the pandemic, they took in a roommate – or a “roommate” – they didn’t clarify.  After doing a clearly not thorough background check, they rented Nick a room of his own.  A month later, the house was raided!  Why?  Police said it was a routine probation check.  Neighbors saw people coming and going, talked to the landlords, and a dispute ensued.  Police showed up and found a locked safe which had a gun, nine pounds of methamphetamines, and $10K in cash.

Gruber doesn’t say he was “dealing drugs”.  He says he was a “broker” in “the drug industry”.  OK, so he’s a dealer with a thesaurus!  He was still convicted and went to jail for two years.  Legally, the landlords were advised to send an eviction notice to Gruber in prison which also stated that if someone didn’t claim his belongings, they would be disposed of.  The landlords say they donated the stuff to the Mormon Church.  Oh, the humanity!  Gruber claims his belongings included thousands of dollars of designer clothes, furnishings and jewelry.  He sued the couple for the value of his missing property – which he totaled at $182K!  Problem was, he didn’t have receipts (well…you know…).  One item on his list caught my eye.  He says he had an H&M V-neck shirt costing $225.  Honey, I shop at H&M – NOTHING costs that much!  The judge awarded him $8,683.92, which Nick felt was a win!  You can see his interview and the entire news report on BillyMasters.com.

(It has since been pointed out to me that the $225 was for 10 H&M V-neck shirts.  Much more reasonable.  But now that I’m looking at the amount of clothes he claims to have had, I wonder if he was running an outlet!)

Our Ask Billy question is actually more of an answer.  Patrick in San Francisco writes, “If you’ve never watched Naked and Afraid, you’ve missed out on the hottest little twunk to come around in a long time – Dan Link.”

I have indeed watched Naked and Afraid and written about it in this very column.  Patrick goes on to tell me that Dan is the first openly gay man to win Naked and Afraid – Last One Standing, which took place in South Africa.  Apparently Dan is a scientist, but did some nude modeling in his earlier years.  Since Patrick shared with me, I’ll share with you – on BillyMasters.com.

When I’m looking up the word “twunk”, it’s definitely time to end another column.  I bet Nick could look it up in his thesaurus.  Once again, we ran long – which sounds like some of the photos you’ll find on www.BillyMasters.com – the site that’s never afraid of nudity!  If you have a question or want to share a find of your own, send it along to Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before Liza gets her fourth hip (and you know what that means…the fifth one is free).  Until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.