Just when you thought you heard it all, the Charlie Sheen HIV story takes an unexpected turn.  According to RadarOnline, there is what is being touted as a “gay sex video” starring Sheen.  A reporter for that media outlet claims to have personally seen three different video clips – totaling roughly 90 seconds long.  It supposedly shows Charlie smoking crack in a hotel room, looking right into the camera, and then sucking the dick of an unidentified guy.  That’s an awful lot of action for 90 seconds!  We hear that the video was leaked because the guy being serviced says that Sheen gave him herpes.  Didn’t I make a joke about that last week?  My God – I’m not only a gossip columnist, I’m also psychic!

If this scenario sounds familiar, that’s because it was part of an anonymous lawsuit against an A-list celebrity male worth in excess of $100 million who was spreading herpes.  The Plaintiff claims that these events took place in Las Vegas in 2011.  The suit claims that Sheen “entered into a nefarious plot designed to lure Plaintiff into his luxurious hotel room to serve his prurient desires.”  Who wrote this lawsuit?  Dame Barbara Cartland?  Nefarious?  Prurient?  We are talking about Las Vegas – where you can give a blow job to hotel employees in an elevator!  After Charlie assured the guy that he didn’t have any diseases, the guy says they partook of the following activities: “mutual oral copulation, mutual self-gratification, rubbing and massaging each other, play-wrestling, licking and (unprotected) intercourse.”  Where the hell is THAT video?????  ‘Cause all of that should take more than 90 seconds!  To make matters more complicated, other parties claim that the suit was settled out of court (for millions of dollars, allegedly), and the only copy of the video was destroyed.  Hmm.