Billy’s Holiday Gifts

Now comes the point in the column where I share Billy’s Holiday Gift Giving Suggestions.  My goal each year is to share things that could make your festivities just a trifle more gay.  One of the most popular items every year is the Orthodox Priest Calendar.  But, frankly, I’m finding it hard to believe any actual priest can do that with a crucifix unless the holy water miraculously turned into lube.  Therefore, my calendar choice this year will appeal to those of you who like a bit of ginger – a lovely holiday flavor.  Last year, a fan sent me the Red Hot Cock Calendar, and I was impressed with what they refer to as their “fire crotches, copper knobs and ginger nuts”.  This year the lads have outdone themselves by also providing the flip side.  Yes, if you prefer your gingers face-down, you could buy the Red Hot Butt Calendar.  Both calendars raise money for testicular cancer and prostate cancer awareness campaigns.  Plus, a little ginger will keep you warm on those long winter nights.  Grab ‘em at

You know how you see an invention on Shark Tank and say, “Why didn’t I think of that?”  Well, the staff at Chi Chi LaRue’s Channel 1 Releasing had a thought – what if there were a way to turn any water bottle into an enema?  You know – for those guys on the go, rushing to a last-minute tryst.  And, thus, Skwert was developed.  The Skwert Water Bottle Enema will fit on most standard water bottle mouths and give you a quick pick-me-up.  For my readers, I’d classify this as a stocking stuffer…although what you stuff is your business.  Pick up a few for surprise guests at


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