Last week was an exciting one for Tom Daley – he walked in his first fashion show.  That excitement was tempered when he was widely criticized for accepting the invitation of Dolce & Gabbana, a fashion team whose anti-gay views are notorious.  The fashion show took place at Harrods in London.  And not just in a department store, but in the food hall.  So, basically, he made his modeling debut in the Pick ‘n Save!  And there were Tom and husband Dustin Lance Black, beaming in that vapid, oblivious way – more “models” than “role models”.  But if you’re interested, you can see Tom walk and talk at the same time on our website.

This leads perfectly into our Ask Billy question from Gary in Miami: “You wrote about Shawn Mendes a couple of weeks ago.  And now Tom Daley says he wants to have sex with him.  So is he gay or not?”

I want to have sex with lots of people – that doesn’t make them gay (or interested).  Tom not only said that Mendes is his celebrity crush, he also said that DLB could film them in the act – how magnanimous.  Tom likes to document everything he does, even trying on pants in the D&G dressing room.  I give kudos to anyone who can look good being shot from below!  But I wonder if there was a bit of off-camera fluffing.  Why?  Well, for something that’s been smushed in a Speedo for years, there’s a lot of flopping about – as you’ll see on BillyMasters.com.

Then there are the two Coreys – Corey Haim and Corey Feldman.  According to the National Enquirer, Charlie Sheen raped the 13-year-old Haim on the set of the 1986 film Lucas.  Sheen “categorically denies these allegations”.  It would have ended there, except Haim’s mom decided to go on Dr. Oz.  She says, “I would have known if anything was wrong.  My kid hid nothing, he was like…transparent.  He never hid anything, he was Corey.  It’s out of character, that’s number one.  When my son was 13 he’s not going to go and ask Charlie Sheen to go and sleep with him.”  But, Mrs. Haim wasn’t through.  “I have to tell you, that this guy Dominick is the guy that abused my son.  My son said so.”  Who is Dominick?  That would be Dominick Brascia, someone who was close to Haim and the one who told the Enquirer that Sheen assaulted Haim!  If this is true, Brascia assaults Haim, and then sells a story to the Enquirer swearing that Haim was assaulted – by Sheen.  That’s some fucked-up shit!

Then there’s the other Corey – Feldman.  Last week, he filed a police report with the LAPD claiming he was molested as a minor.  And, he names names.  And he, too, went on The Dr. Oz Show, and named two of the people.  The first one is identified as Jon Grissom, his former assistant who currently lives in Mexico.  The second one is talent agent Marty Weiss, who is a convicted sex offender.

Picture it, 1981.  Former model Scott Brunton was 23 years old, working as a waiter, and somehow he had exchanged phone numbers with George Takei.  When Brunton broke up with a boyfriend, he called Takei, who offered to take him out to dinner and a show.  After the show, they went to Takei’s condo for a drink.  Brunton says that after two drinks, he felt dizzy and “must have passed out”.  “The next thing I remember I was coming to and he had my pants down around my ankles and he was groping my crotch and trying to get my underwear off and feeling me up at the same time, trying to get his hands down my underwear.  I came to and said, ‘What are you doing?!’  I said, ‘I don’t want to do this.’  He goes, ‘You need to relax.  I am just trying to make you comfortable.  Get comfortable.’  And I said, ‘No, I don’t want to do this.’  And I pushed him off and he said, ‘OK, fine.’  And I said I am going to go and he said, ‘If you feel you must.  You’re in no condition to drive.’  I said, ‘I don’t care I want to go.’  So I managed to get my pants up and compose myself and I was just shocked.  I walked out and went to my car until I felt well enough to drive home, and that was that.”

Needless to say, Takei is “shocked and bewildered at the claims”.  He actually goes one step further – “I have wracked my brain to ask if I remember Mr. Brunton, and I cannot say I do.”  OUCH!  “Right now it is a he said / he said situation, over alleged events nearly 40 years ago.  But those that know me understand that non-consensual acts are so antithetical to my values and my practices, the very idea that someone would accuse me of this is quite personally painful.”  But there’s more.  Scott planned to confront Takei at a book signing in 1994 – 13 years after the alleged incident.  At the last minute, he chickened out – but he did get a book with this inscription:  “To Scott – The enterprising man who boldly goes – to the stars.  Fondly, George Takei”.  Now, call me crazy, but I don’t know many victims of sexual assault who wait in a line to see their attacker at a book signing and ask for an autograph!

Weeks ago, I said it was just the beginning of the sexual assault parade.  And it still hasn’t hit its zenith.  It started with Harvey Weinstein, but I never heard this gem.  Did you know he made a woman watch him masturbate into a potted plant?  That can’t be good for the plant.  It’s like American Pie meets Little Shop of Horrors!

The latest story is regarding Louis CK – a scandal I can’t get very excited about.  But whoever helped him write his statement was worth every cent!  It showed remorse, growth, and enlightenment – that’s how you do it.  And now there’s talk about Jeremy Piven.  I met him once on the red carpet – I got herpes just looking at him.  That said, I’m not sure if I believe rumors that he sexually harassed women.  Paid them, yes – that I believe.

Remember Steven Seagal?  To appreciate this story, you have to think back.  You cannot think of him as he appears today – like Jabba the Hut with a ponytail, wearing a kimono.  You’ve gotta remember back when he was a big star – those of you under 40 will have great difficulty doing that.  Portia de Rossi – aka Mrs. Ellen DeGeneres – claims that at an audition, Seagal unzipped his leather pants in order to see if they had chemistry.  P.S.  They didn’t.  He asked another woman to “sit on my face for an hour”.  Now, if he had used that line on Portia…

Last year, Kevin Spacey allegedly assaulted an 18-year-old male busboy at a Nantucket restaurant.  According to the lad’s mom, her son did lie about his age, so Spacey bought him “drink after drink”.  Once the boy was drunk, Kevin is said to have put his hands down the boy’s pants and fondled his genitals.  When Kevin went to the bathroom, a woman in the restaurant asked the boy if he was OK and told him to run.  The boy just filed a police report.  For his part, Spacey has laid low and checked into The Meadows, a rehab center in Arizona that comes at a price tag of $36,000 a month.  He’ll have good company – I’m told Harvey Weinstein is also in residence.

Lots of other male/male accusations are going around.  Anthony Edwards writes about producer Gary Goddard.  “I was molested by Goddard, my best friend was raped by him – and this went on for years.”  Cheyenne Jackson says, “I have stories, too.  I mean, definitely, I have felt like a piece of meat so much.”  I hate to bring it up, but you can see Cheyenne play with his meat (to completion) on BillyMasters.com.

I’ve dated my share of hot men.  Strike that – more than my share.  And I’ve never taken offense when people have blatantly lusted after my partners or accused them of looking overtly sexual.  I enjoy that – and if someone looks a little whorey, it typically means they look like someone people would pay for sex.  If I’m getting it for free, it’s a win/win.  I say this as an introduction to some scaldingly hot photos of Dan Savage‘s spouse.  If you want to know why the writer said “It Gets Better“, it’s because he gets to sleep with Terry Miller, Tom of Finland‘s first official US Ambassador.  Unlike other ambassadorships, this one probably needs to be well-versed in a variety of positions, to say nothing of maintaining a very minimalist wardrobe.  In fact, the pictorial we just got ahold of indicates to me that Dan might need to use both hands…if you catch my drift.  Yes, that means you can see every inch of Terry on BillyMasters.com.

Another open secret in Hollywood has been made public.  Actor Jonathan Bennett, best known for his role in Mean Girls, has officially come out.  Not only did he come out, but he came out with one of the hottest boyfriends around – Jaymes Vaughan, who is known as the first openly gay Chippendales dancer and former Amazing Race contestant.  This is not completely uncharted territory for Bennett.  After all, he was on Kathy Griffin‘s My Life on the D-List – almost an admission of homosexuality.  And then there was his time on Dancing with the Stars when Julianne Hough said, “He Tweeted me last year and said I had a nice butt, and I thought, ‘Oh he’s hitting on me – I should try to go on a date with him!  OH, he’s gay – so I was like, that’s not gonna work!'”  If anyone should know a thing or two about keeping a secret, it’s a Hough!  After Bennett posted about his relationship with Vaughan, he shared a message from a closeted fan thanking him for being a role model.  He responded saying, “THIS!  THIS is why it is so important to live our truths loudly and proudly.  You never know who is watching and you never know who you are inspiring and giving hope to just by simply being yourself.”  And since the couple is so photogenic, we’ll post some pics of them on BillyMasters.com.

“It seems to me that Kevin Spacey coming out as gay amidst allegations of pedophilia
is like Jeffrey Dahmer admitting that he’s not a vegetarian!”  – Billy Masters

As we went to press last week, the Kevin Spacey debacle was just unfolding.  As I said at the time, I was proud of Anthony Rapp‘s honesty, and that his words got Spacey to admit he’s gay after years of deflecting.  But, of course, Spacey’s admission was made in order to deflect away from the charges of predatory activity on a minor.  The fallout has been staggering.  In the space of 48 hours, Kevin went from being an odd bachelor who went to award shows with his mother to being a pariah.  His agents and publicists dumped him, his International Emmy Founders Award was rescinded, Netflix cancelled House of Cards (although discussions are ongoing regarding continuing the show without him), and the network also dropped plans to release his Gore Vidal biopic.  In the past week, many men have come forward with their Spacey stories – most recently, a story that he groped Richard Dreyfuss‘ son when he was 18!  Everything we’ve heard whispered about him for decades is now being shouted from the rooftops.  The Old Vic (where Spacey was artistic director from 2004-2015) even set up an anonymous hotline for men who want to come forward with their stories.  While Spacey has said he will “seek evaluation and treatment”, his brother has come forward saying that their father was a member of the American Nazi Party, grew a mustache to resemble Hitler, and sexually assaulted him (Spacey’s brother) from the time he was 12 years old.  So what?

Tommy Dorfman from 13 Reasons Why has come forward with a story of his own.  He Tweeted, “As a person who was sexually assaulted and abused at 14 by a 27-year-old, I applaud [Anthony Rapp] for his courage.  It’s scary to speak out”.  He previously gave an interview to Gay Times where he said, “When you’re 14, you think it’s totally fine.  I didn’t wanna, when I bottomed for the first time, like, I was really young, and I didn’t quite know what that meant.  I only had porn really.  I didn’t have the language to ask for what I might need or even say no in that kind of position.  It was very scary thing.  And I think for me at 14 I thought I could do anything and I was ready for anything…and I wasn’t, I was not ready for that.”

I recently flew non-stop from Miami back to Los Angeles for the obscene amount of $63.  For this bargain fare, you don’t expect much – I’m surprised I even got a seat!  But since I’m a loyal American Airlines flyer, I was given a window seat near the front of the plane.  Surprisingly, the two seats next to me were empty – until the plane doors shut.  Then, a lady of indeterminate age plopped into the aisle seat.  “I hope you don’t mind, hon.”  Since I had work to do, I didn’t care.  She quickly downed a double vodka on the rocks, put on a sleeping mask, and passed out.  I was so engrossed with my work, it was a couple of hours before I noticed she had taken off her sweatshirt.  Yes, the woman next to me was clad in only a black bra!  And, if I’m not mistaken, I could also glimpse a hint of areola.

Meanwhile across the pond, Madonna made headlines by allegedly flying coach from London to Lisbon.  Well, that’s what we all heard, right?  We saw the photo – it must be true.  But I was struck by something interesting – Madge is in the window seat, someone is in the aisle seat, and the middle seat is empty.  And she’s in the bulkhead.  Having traveled extensively across the continent, I know that many smaller airlines consider “premium” to be up by the front with an empty middle seat.  Sure enough, we found out that Air Portugal short-haul flights are on planes where all of the seats are identical, but with two classes of service.  Their “Executive” section is the front seats with an empty middle seat – and you get a full meal.  So for all the chatter about Madonna not being a Material Girl, she paid at least $500 for a seat a few rows closer to the front than people who paid less than $100.  So, to recap, I paid far less to go much farther than Madonna.  At least we both kept our tops on.

At long last, we have an Ask Billy question worthy of this column.  Justin in San Francisco writes, “What do you know about Shawn Mendes?  He’s so fucking hot.  He sure seems gay to me, but I figure you’d know for sure.”

The sexy singer, who is now 19 and therefore fair game, addressed these rumors last year in a series of Snapchats after numerous posts about his “gay vibe”.  “First of all, I’m not gay.  Second of all, it shouldn’t make a difference if I was or if I wasn’t.  The focus should be on the music and not my sexuality.”  That’s a lovely sentiment, but the many photo spreads focusing on Shawn’s fantastic physique and face belie the sentiment.  And then there are those questionable selfies which have fallen into our clutches.  They also don’t focus on his vocals – although they may inspire other oral activities, if you catch my drift.  Are they really him?  Decide for yourself on BillyMasters.com.

One of the things Griffin blames many people for is her disastrous tenure on Fashion Police at E!  “I left that show because I didn’t feel like they were doing Joan Rivers‘ legacy right, and I didn’t feel like I could do a good job there.”  Melissa Rivers has a vastly different opinion on Kathy’s departure.  “My biggest complaint was the feeling that she kind of shit all over my mother’s legacy in her statement on leaving.”  It’s a moot point now because E! has cancelled Fashion Police.  I suppose it’s a miracle that it lasted these past three years without Joan Rivers.  What’s more mind-boggling is that the show has been on the air in some form or another since 1995!  Admittedly, there were a few years that it went on without the Grim Rivers – when Joan and Missy defected to TV Guide Channel (a little detail that is rarely mentioned in the CliffsNotes version of the show’s history).  To pay tribute to Joan and her legacy, such as it is, E! will air Fashion Police: The Farewell on November 27th.  It will include the current panel, clips from the past, and outtakes.  And likely not include a special appearance by Griffin.  Rest in peace.

“The whole time I was working there, I didn’t know Andy Cohen wanted to be me.” 
– Kathy Griffin on her long and, apparently, unhappy tenure at Bravo.  Watch what happens, indeed!

You all know Kathy Griffin was dumped from CNN‘s New Year’s Eve with Anderson Cooper and replaced by Andy Cohen.  Well, TMZ ran into Cohen at LAX, congratulated him on the gig, and asked if he’s talked to Kathy about it.  Andy innocently said, “Who?”  The “reporter” (and I used that term loosely) then clarified, “Kathy Griffin.  Kathy Griffin.”  Andy simply said, “I don’t know her.”  The cameraman was most certainly flummoxed – well, he would have been if he knew what “flummoxed” meant.  Obviously Andy knows Kathy – in fact, she’s the one who introduced us!  I suspect Cohen was simply playing dumb.  Unlike most “showbiz friendships”, Andy and Anderson are actually best friends.  So, who did you expect him to side with?

Kathy wasted no time in clapping back (as the kids say).  She Tweeted: “Even when it’s on tape, there are doubters?  He is NOT kidding w paps.  Was my boss for 10 years.  Treated me like a dog.  Deeply misogynistic.”  But Kathy wasn’t finished.  After her Tweet, Harvey Levin of TMZ called – likely to see if she wanted to make a comment on the clip.  Instead, she posted a 17-minute video which is surely the definition of viral.  In it, she refers to Cohen’s comment to the paparazzi as “a vicious interview”.  She plays Harvey’s message in full – giving anyone who wants it (hands?  anyone?) Levin’s phone number.  She then says, “By the way, Harvey, where the fuck did you get my personal cell number, and who the fuck do you think you are harassing me on my cell phone, calling me directly?  Where’d you get my number?  Your good friend Lisa Bloom?”  Having heard the message, I wouldn’t categorize it as “harassing”.  But I also wouldn’t categorize Cohen’s comments as an “interview” or “vicious”.

Kathy also exposes Levin’s close ties with Trump, calling him “the gay version of Kellyanne Conway!”  She reveals that Trump and Levin speak several times a week.  She also claimed that all of TMZ‘s stories about women are ones that make them look bad or where they physically look bad.  As opposed to all those positive stories about men!

As to Andy Cohen, she says he was a “miserable boss for all those years”.  She also states how loathsome Bravo is to women – both the women behind the scenes and the women on the shows.  Easy to say now that she doesn’t have a show on the network – which is the double-edged sword everyone is tiptoeing around.  She says, “I didn’t know that when they ended The D-List and I desperately wanted to do a talk show, Andy Cohen would be the first television executive in the history of television to give himself a talk show that seems to get picked up every season.”  Griffin claims that the two times she was on Watch What Happens Live, “Andy Cohen privately asked me in an office…if I wanted to do blow.”  She says these incidents happened when they were both alone in a room and they made her very uncomfortable.  She predicted Andy would say he was just kidding.  And, she was right – Cohen Tweeted, “I am completely stunned by this story.  It is 100% false and totally made up.”

Lastly, Griffin points fingers at virtually everyone she’s ever worked with.  Agents, publicists, producers – they all get named.  Most are women, and most she claims “didn’t protect me”.  All the bad publicity and career foibles she’s had are because of these people.  She also says that because of the Trump investigation, she’s been on the no-fly list, the Interpol list, and that she’s been “detained alone at every single airport I’ve gone to.”  Kathy wraps it up by saying, “So when I go to Singapore, if I don’t return, I just want you guys to know that’s why.”

Just as we went to press, a story broke which we’ve already re-written – twice.  Anthony Rapp, original cast member of Rent and currently starring on Star Trek: Discovery, accused Kevin Spacey of making sexual advances on him when he was 14!  In 1986, Rapp was on Broadway in Precious Sons and Spacey was in Long Day’s Journey Into Night.  After a party at Spacey’s home, the two were alone.  Kevin laid Anthony on the bed and then, as Rapp says, “He lays down on top of me.  He was trying to seduce me.  I don’t know if I would have used that language.  But I was aware that he was trying to get with me sexually.”  Anthony got himself out of the apartment, while Spacey stood in the doorway saying, “Are you sure you wanna go?”  Rapp says, “I still to this day can’t wrap my head around so many aspects of it.  It’s just deeply confusing to me.”

He didn’t tell anyone about this until he was in Six Degrees of Separation on Broadway between 1990-92.  I can corroborate the timeline because when I met Anthony in 1991, he told me about this incident.  He even tried to go public in a 2001 Q&A with The Advocate – although Spacey’s name was redacted from the story.  So why speak up now?  “Not simply to air a grievance, but to try to shine another light on the decades of behavior that have been allowed to continue because many people, including myself, being silent.  I’m feeling really awake to the moment that we’re living in, and I’m hopeful that this can make a difference.”  But can one voice make a difference? 

Within moments of Rapp going public, Spacey made his own statement.  He Tweeted, “I have a lot of respect and admiration for Anthony Rapp as an actor.  I am beyond horrified to hear his story.  I honestly do not remember the encounter, it would have been over 30 years ago.  But if I did behave as he describes, I owe him the sincerest apology for what would have been deeply inappropriate behavior, and I am sorry for the feelings he describes having carried with him all these years.”  And then he added this: “This story had encouraged me to address other things in my life.  I know that there are stories out there about me and that some have been fueled by the fact that I have been so protective of my privacy.  As those closest to me know, in my life I have had relationships with both men and women.  I have loved and had romantic encounters with men throughout my life, and I choose now to live as a gay man.  I want to deal with this honestly and openly and that starts with examining my own behavior.”  While nothing excuses Spacey’s behavior, it’s a start.  Just goes to show, the power of one voice.  Bravo, Anthony.

Talk about a meeting of the minds – the world’s hottest math teacher, Pietro Boselli, got together with the world’s hottest deaf model, Nyle DiMarco, for a workout session.  This happened in London, where Nyle was named Attitude magazine’s Man of the Year.  Pietro Tweeted “@NyleDiMarco is in London so I took him sightseeing: Around the gym of course… Great meeting you buddy, you’re great carry on the way you are.” – whatever that means.  Nyle responded, “Great meeting you!  And…Keep an eye out for a collab video!  Hint: he’s pretty good in sign language.”  With their tête-à-tête over, Nyle told Attitude what he looks for in a man.  “Probably men who are athletic, who like the gym, love food and travel.  That’s it.  I’m a simple guy.”  All of you who have been reading books, learning about history, politics, world economics, or have any other talent – forget it.  It’s hot guys who are interested in gym, food and travel.  But they’re pretty to look at, on BillyMasters.com.

When “great meeting you” is the universal catchphrase for hot guys everywhere, it’s definitely time to end yet another column.  Oh, I didn’t even get to tell you – Demi Lovato is willing to date women.  So now that’s two sexes without any interest in her.  One exception might be a guy looking for a circumcision.  If that doesn’t include you, skip it and check out www.BillyMasters.com, the site where nothing is ever cut.  If you have a question, send it along to Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before Jonathan, the giant tortoise, shows up on Scruff!  Until next time, great meeting you.  And remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

Someone who isn’t known for wearing much makeup is Melissa Etheridge.  And yet, I must say she’s positively glowing in the photo we just received.  Perhaps because it’s her mugshot!  She was arrested after her tour bus was stopped by Customs after crossing the Canadian border into North Dakota on August 17th (the birthday of Big Mama Masters and Belinda Carlisle).  The K-9 patrol detected possible drugs, searched the bus, and found marijuana oil.  Apparently Etheridge has a prescription in California for the oil which she uses to manage pain from cancer.  While it’s legal in California, it isn’t in North Dakota.  She pled not guilty, cheerfully posed for a mugshot, and was booked for possession of a controlled substance.  So we’ve learned two things: 1) Don’t bring prescription drugs into a state where they are illegal and B) Who knew North Dakota bordered Canada?

Meanwhile in New York, the 35th anniversary production of Harvey Fierstein‘s Torch Song (Trilogy has been dropped from the title) opened off-Broadway.  Although Michael Urie is the star of the show, Harvey was the real star of the night.  And joining him were some of his previous co-stars – Fisher Stevens, Matthew Broderick, and Brian Kerwin.  A photo of this reunion can also be found on our website.

Kathy Griffin may be kicking off her world tour in Australia, but that hasn’t stopped her from making waves here in the States.  She Tweeted, “Dear @LisaBloom pls stop calling me.  If you’d like to refund me the tens of thousands of $$ I wasted on your services maybe I’ll talk to you.”  You’ll recall that Bloom, spawn of famed legal eagle Gloria Allred, represented Griffin at her now-infamous press conference regarding the photo of a beheaded former TV host.  Bloom responded, saying that Kathy deviated from the script the lawyers hammered out.  “I was sorry she made that choice but I respected her right to speak as she saw fit.  She was, as she always says, then widely panned for her comments.  Now she blames me.  She’s the only client I’ve ever had who chose to extemporize at a press conference rather than read from notes we prepared in advance.”  Bloom ended her statement with this, “I still believe that Kathy Griffin is one of the funniest comics alive, that she meant no ill will with the photo, and I wish her the best.”  And she’s welcomed back anytime.

Kathy then revealed that Bloom attempted to cajole her into a joint media tour.  While Bloom presented the TV offers as insistent on having the attorney present, the same people privately told Kathy they’d be happy to have her alone.  “If you want my Lisa Bloom statement, anybody, OK, here it is.  Yes, I got ‘Bloomed’.  Yes, I did not have a good experience with her.  I felt that she and her husband exacerbated my personal situation.  The horrible press conference was a disaster.  I’m not gonna sue Lisa Bloom.  I don’t think Lisa Bloom should be shot, like people want to shoot me.  So there’s my fucking statement.”

Then there’s all this Weinstein drama, and one must give credit where credit’s due.  I’m not the biggest fan of Satchel Ronan O’Sullivan Farrow Allen Sinatra – aka Ronan Farrow.  But he did do the leg work on this piece and did the digging even without the support of a news outlet.  He went rogue (if not commando), and got people to talk.  That NBC passed on the story is yet another mystery, but Ronan’s tenacity got it to The New Yorker.  The rest is history.  That said, I have to admit something that won’t be popular – I really don’t care about any of this.  I mean, Cosby was drugging and raping people – that was interesting.  And I have enormous sympathy for anyone who is physically assaulted.  That is horrific.  But what about the story that Harvey put his hands on Gwyneth Paltrow‘s shoulders and suggested they get a massage.  Do I believe it happened?  Sure.  Does it get me excited?  Nah.  What about reports that he made advances on Angelina Jolie?  What interests me is the common thread – Brad Pitt!  I’m waiting for Jennifer Aniston to come forward with a teary testimony.

Lest there be any question, in no way am I condoning Weinstein’s behavior or excusing it on any level.  But, getting to the heart of the matter (and here’s the unpopular part) – I think there is a world of difference between rape/sexual assault and someone propositioning you in a sexual way.  It’s curious that this very week, when Pink entered the stage for her first song on Saturday Night Live, she smacked her guitarist on the ass.  Sexual assault or playful?  Intent is everything.  Scores of women are coming out saying, “Oh, I was once in an uncomfortable situation like that.”  Even a few guys are coming forward.  I think I was actually there when Terry Crews was groped!  But to all the people out there who were afraid to stand up to Harvey or anyone in a position of power, here’s what I have to say to you – sometimes it costs more to say “yes” than it does to say “no”.  And, I know from whence I speak.  Because I, Billy Masters, have been in more than one compromising position over the years.  Did it feel icky?  Yes.  Did I feel violated?  No – I felt empowered because I shot these people down.  Did taking a stand hurt me?  Perhaps – I’m sure I lost out on some opportunities.  But it would have hurt me much more to have given in.  And either way, I made a decision and I stand by it.  Period.

These days, Donna Karan has all the relevance of a baked potato.  But she’s suddenly in the news after not only defending Harvey Weinstein but also blaming the women.  She was on the red carpet of the CinéFashion Film Awards when she said, “It’s not just Harvey Weinstein.  You look at everything all over the world today and what [women] are asking by just presenting themselves the way they do.  To see it here in our own country is very difficult, but I also think, how do we display ourselves?  How do we present ourselves as women?  What are we asking?  Are we asking for it by presenting all the sensuality and all the sexuality?  And what are we throwing out to our children today about how to dance and how to perform and what to wear?  How much should they show?”  She now says, “My statements were taken out of context and do not represent how I feel about the current situation concerning Harvey Weinstein.”  Except they were on a live video.  I can’t even imagine Babs will stand by her now.

Could it be there’s another “victim” whose keeping quiet?  Well, of course, there’s the wife who got where she is the same way all those other starlets did.  But when she saw what was happening around her, she threatened to leave.  And then Quasimodo had an idea – what if she had someone to satisfy her sexual needs?  She made a wish list.  Cut to that limber lad so attractive to women and men alike.  A golden boy who’s willing to bend over backwards (and forwards) to get ahead.  Suddenly he’s on the hubby’s payroll and banging the wife.  You see, he thought she’d leave Cyclops for him.  But, in actuality, it was all yet another deal.  When the mover and shaker figured it out, he threatened to go public.  And suddenly, poof, he was offered his dream role on Broadway!  And like so many whores before him, he kept his big mouth shut – even when the Broadway show was mysteriously postponed.

When you can huff and puff and blow a blind item down, it’s definitely time to end yet another column.  Of course, we’re far less circumspect on www.BillyMasters.com, the site that cannot be bought – but can be rented.  And like so many rent boys before me, you can send your requests into Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before I take a vow of silence…or chastity…or any vow at all!  So, until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

From one Donna to another, I’m happy to report that Donna Mills has a gig.  I’m surprised to report it’s onstage in a play.  And I’m downright shocked to say that she’s going to be in Driving Miss Daisy – playing Miss Daisy!  Then I did my research.  The character of Miss Daisy is 72 years old.  Donna Mills is 76!  In other words, she’s actually too old to play the part!!!  Be that as it may, play the part she shall – at the lovely Colony Theatre in Burbank.  The show will run November 4 through December 10.  You can grab tickets at ColonyTheatre.org.

When last we left Kathy Griffin, she had announced a world tour, shaved her head in solidarity with her sister who had cancer, and was feuding with a neighbor over a pool party.  Since then, her hair has started to grow back in, her sister died, and the neighbor thinks she’s spying on him.  On top of all that, she made a surprise appearance in Los Angeles.  Except it wasn’t much of a surprise – Kathy has appeared at the annual Best in Drag fundraiser almost 20 times in the past.  So the fact that she chose that venue to make her first domestic stage appearance since the Trump debacle was not surprising.  That she entered the stage wearing a non-bloody Trump mask and taking a knee was perhaps somewhat of a surprise.  What she did was less of a routine and more of a proclamation that she was back.  And just to prove it, she read some letters she got from fans and foes alike.  The most amusing was an e-mail addressed to Anderson Cooper but CC’d to Kathy.  “Dear Anderson.  From one homo to another, you’re a fickle faggot.  Really?  Not supporting and backing Kathy Griffin after she had your back for years?  Even to talk about your cock-sucking in her comedy back when you were still a closeted queen.  And another thing, Anderson.  Homo rule 101 – you always back your fag hag.”  You can see the rest of her appearance on BillyMasters.com.

Speaking of Anderson Cooper, you all know that Kathy was fired from co-hosting New Year’s Eve on CNN with Coop.  At long last, a replacement has been named.  And that is…drum roll, please…Andy Cohen!  You didn’t need to be Jeane Dixon to predict this – I said this would happen the moment Kathy was fired.  But, news is news.

“Girl, listen, this is getting juicy.  Andy Cohen, I’m waiting for
The Real Housewives of Eastern Europe.  Go get ’em! 
Get on this, Andy Cohen.  Those bitches are gonna be fighting with swords and everything!” 
– Sheryl Underwood on The Talk discusses Andy Cohen’s offer to mediate between
Ivana and Melania Trump.  I’d definitely watch that show.

Why did Ivana Trump write a book?  Not that I don’t find her entertaining – in that 80s Bond villainess kinda way.  But there she was, promoting her new book on Good Morning America, saying that although she has a direct line to the White House, she doesn’t call because Melania is there.  P.S. Is Melania there?  I thought she was in New York?  Ivana also said she doesn’t want to make Melania jealous “or something like that because I am basically first Trump wife.  I’m First Lady, OK?”  I don’t know if I’d brag about that, but she is certainly right.  And how pathetic for Melania to actually respond to this comment.  I would have never thought that the smart wife was Marla – who Ivana never refers to by name in the book and simply calls “The Showgirl”!

For years, Bette Midler has begged Disney to make a Hocus Pocus sequel.  But each time she brings it up, nobody at the studio seemed interested.  Therefore, it’s intriguing that Disney just announced a made-for-TV remake of the flick – which sounds like it will not include Bette Midler, Kathy Najimy or Sarah Jessica Parker.  If SJP is so hot to make a sequel, she might wanna see if Kristin Davis and Cynthia Nixon are interested in this.

If Disney needs a potential witch, might I suggest my pal Marissa Jaret Winokur?  The Tony-winning star played the role of Winifred Sanderson in the Unauthorized Musical Parody of Hocus Pocus at Rockwell Table and Stage in Los Angeles.  Marissa was SO fabulous in the role, she signed on to do a handful of shows this year.  And then tragedy struck – the person she was alternating with got a gig in NYC and left town.  That means Marissa is suddenly doing ALL THE SHOWS!  So you have oodles of opportunities to see Winokur strut her stuff.  It just opened and runs until November 4th, so grab your tickets fast at Rockwell-LA.com.

Another oldster who has been out of the spotlight is Barbara Walters, who recently celebrated her 88th birthday in seclusion.  Insiders claim that the legendary newswoman is “forgetful and confused” – which is how I described her final years on The View!  Up until two years ago, she could be seen walking through Central Park every day.  Now, she doesn’t even go out because she’s afraid she could fall and break a hip.

Kim Cattrall is still getting huge backlash from her decision not to make a third Sex and the City film.  Everybody from co-stars to people behind the scenes are blaming her for the plug being pulled on the sequel which supposedly was poised to begin shooting.  But, everyone neglects to mention that Kim never agreed to be in it!  She never signed a contract.  She never negotiated.  She said she didn’t want to do it from day one.  So, if the studio went ahead and planned a shooting schedule around someone not signed to the film, how is that her fault?  I’m told it was a bullying tactic – plan the film, announce it, schedule filming, and guilt her into doing it.  But, baby, Cattrall don’t play.  And she doesn’t feel bad about it.  Last week, she told Piers Morgan, “I don’t feel like a victim.  I feel like I came out of this on top.  This has given me a fantastic platform.  Sarah Jessica, she could have been nicer.  She could have in some way.  I don’t know what her issue is, I never have.”  So if someone is to blame for this franchise being dead in the water, you might wanna look at the star and producer.  BTW, Kim may not be down for another SATC, but she’s open to discussions regarding Mannequin 3.  Mind you, she opted out of 1991’s Mannequin Two: On The Move, which was called “one of the worst follow-ups ever made”.  If she stars in Mannequin 3, I suspect she’d be a mannequin at Ross Dress For Less.

“You know, very few people on Planet Earth, if Little Richard dials
somebody’s phone number, there’s nobody on Earth that wouldn’t answer it. 
I don’t care if it’s the President of the United States or the President of Africa.” 
– Danny Shelton on Three Angels Broadcasting Network.  The President of Africa???? 
He’s probably friends with the Emperor of Asia!

Here’s what I’ve learned lo these many decades in the gossip biz – many media outlets simply reprint a story that someone else reported.  They don’t go back to the source, they don’t do additional research – it’s just cut and paste.  So I was curious when I read headlines that Little Richard, the alleged architect of rock and roll, was publicly denouncing homosexuality.  Aside from the obvious, I wondered how someone who is 84 and hasn’t had a hit in several decades was making news.  And because I have standards, I watched every minute of his endless interview with the Three Angels Broadcasting Network – a network I don’t believe you’ll find on Spectrum or Comcast!

First things first – where’s the wig?  When I think of Little Richard, I picture him with a mop of hair on his head reminiscent of Miss Maxine Waters!  In this interview, he looks like OJ at the McDonald’s drive-thru!  Since 3ABN is a religious network, most of the chat focuses on Richard’s faith.  I had trouble focusing on anything other than his purple sequin pumps!  Little Richard says he’s turned down hundreds of thousands of dollars to do shows because it is impossible to serve two masters.  Personally, I’ve never found that particularly difficult.  Occasionally, I’ve served more than two – but that’s another story.  Of course, Ritchie also revealed that after his last show, his nephew said, “It’s time for you to stop – ’cause you sound awful”.  A far more believable scenario.

One of the quotes I keep reading is Little Richard condemned “unnatural affections”.  So, here’s the context – Richard was talking about the second coming of Jesus (and you haven’t lived until you’ve had someone named Jesus come twice!).  “All these things, so much unnatural affections.  So much of people just doing everything and don’t think about God and don’t want no parts of it.”  I don’t find that particularly pointed or inflammatory. 

The next alleged anti-gay comment was this quote:  “When I first come in show business, they wanted you to look like everybody but yourself.  And anybody that comes in show business, they gonna say are you gay, are you straight, are you a homosexual or something?  They’re gonna say it.  But the God Jesus made men men, he made women women.  And you gotta live the way God wants you to live.  But, see, he made you.  He loves all of us.  He loves whatever you are, he loves you.  I don’t care who you are, he loves you.”  Maybe I’m missing something, but that sounds to me like someone espousing an all-loving God.

Admittedly, it gets a bit sticky when Richard is asked about men wearing drag.  “A real man won’t wear no dress.  He won’t feel right with that type of attire on.  Not a real man.  I don’t think that’s acceptable to God.  The Lord tells us in the Bible that a man shouldn’t wear hers and a woman shouldn’t wear his.  It’s in the Bible.”  Is it?  Is it in the Bible?  ‘Cause I must have missed that part.  Perhaps it’s in the long-suppressed Book of RuPaul!

Richard ends by weighing in on public restrooms.  “I don’t think that a woman should go in a man’s bathroom.  And I don’t think a man should go in a woman’s bathroom…I don’t call nobody names because they go into a woman’s bathroom.  I don’t put no titles on nobody.  I don’t call nobody nothing.  I just say that when I was a boy, we had the respect not to go into the woman’s restroom and we had the respect not to go in the men’s bathroom.  That’s the way it was.   Things was like that.  Now it’s different.  People have their own thing in mind, their own setup.  I can’t tell nobody what to do, and I’m not telling nobody what to do.  And I love you all – I don’t care what you are, or where you’re from, or who you are or what color – I love you.  And God loves you too, and don’t you forget that.

I may be back on native soil, but our Ask Billy question this week comes from across the pond.  Lloyd of London asks, “Did you Yanks get Queers yet?  It’s great and I think you’d definitely enjoy it.”

Queers is a BBC series of eight 15-minute monologues commemorating the 50 years since the UK’s Sexual Offenses Act of 1967, which decriminalized homosexual acts.  Each of the monologues is handled by a different actor, including such luminaries as Alan Cumming, Russell Tovey, and Ben Whishaw.  While the whole thing will air on BBC America on October 14th, we’ll post the aforementioned three on BillyMasters.com.

Any day now, we’ll be getting a reboot of Dynasty.  So it’s fitting that one of the original series stars is back in the news.  What makes it newsworthy is that Gordon Thomson, who played Adam, has come out of the closet.  Of course, I can’t imagine anyone is particularly surprised – the dark, brooding, chiseled-featured actor always came off as a snappy queen…and I say that with affection.  If I’m not mistaken, during his “Dynasty” years he was married to a significantly older woman.  Anyway, last week he officially came out as gay at the ripe old age of 72.  He tells The Daily Beast there was never any thought of doing so in the ’80s.  “To come out would have been professional suicide without question.”  Part of the issue was playing a leading man on a soap.  “You’re also a source of fantasy.  Ian McKellen and Derek Jacobi are wonderful people, but pardon me, how many audience members fantasize about fucking either one of them?  Really.  It had a lot to do with what you looked like, I’m afraid.”  Meow!

Even in today’s world, Thomson thinks looks and money are the prime considerations when it comes to an actor contemplating going public about their sexuality.  He thinks Matt Bomer is “extraordinarily good-looking and talented”.  But he doesn’t think his coming out was much of a risk “because he has a rich, successful husband.  He doesn’t need his work to live.”  His candor extends to the topic of his old show returning to the airwaves.  “I have had a look at the new Dynasty and I am appalled.  What the fuck is The CW doing?  It’s utter shit.”

Once I returned stateside, I stopped in Massachusetts long enough to see the new play WARHOLCAPOTE at the American Repertory Theater in Cambridge.  This play about Andy Warhol and Truman Capote was supposed to star Stephen Spinella and Leslie Jordan.  Alas, due to “unforeseen personal circumstances”, Leslie withdrew from the production.  His place was taken by Dan Butler – not what one would consider an effortless replacement, but it works better than anticipated.  While Warhol is somewhat a one-note character (as he was in real life), Capote goes on a journey which Butler commendably navigates.  If I were a betting man, I’d think the script – which is a work in progress – was not completely to Leslie’s liking.  As an evening of theatre, it’s provocative.  It needs a bit more depth, but I think it could develop into something special.  It’s running until October 13th.

Meanwhile, Will & Grace dealt with rewriting history with a wink and a nudge.  As you’ll recall, the original series finale flashed forward to Will and Grace’s kids serendipitously meeting in college.  In the new series premiere, Karen comes out of a daze and asks what happened to their kids who grew up and got married.  Will says, “That never happened.”  Karen slyly replies, “What a relief – nobody wants to see you two raise kids.”  And that’s that.  The rest of the episode found the quartet regaining their familiar footing with a respectable script.  Aside from the addition of a brass section to the theme song (it sounds like they’re trying a bit too hard), I enjoyed it.

I was struck by the following headline: “Town Tries To Legally Ban Drag Show”.  And I thought, “Isn’t it too soon for another remake of Footloose?”  But wait – an all-drag version.  Hmmm.  We might have to change some of the words to “Let’s Hear It For The Boy”, but I’m in.  The story is from Portland, Tennessee – the drag capital of the world – and the city council heard arguments for and against a proposed ordinance that would outlaw drag shows.  Ray Guillermo, the owner of the club putting on the shows, said, “I think a lack of knowledge is the problem here.  There is no nudity.  This is not adult entertainment”.  Turns out, some people think drag shows include nudity or eroticism – clearly they don’t have basic cable!  But some of the other residents made comments which indicate homophobia is driving this potential ban.  One man said of drag queens, “If they’re on the side of the road with a flat tire, I’ll stop and help…but I don’t support this type of activity”.  He just described the plot of To Wong Foo!

It used to be a big deal for Kathy Griffin if she fought with Hasselbeck and was banned from The View.  That’s small potatoes compared to her latest scandals.  And now it’s closer to home – she’s feuding with a neighbor.  But don’t get too nervous – it’s not Kim and Kanye.  It’s Jeffrey Mezger, who is the CEO of KB Home – a company I don’t know anything about, but apparently he’s a big deal.  Here’s what happened – on September 16th, Mezger’s grandkids were in the pool with some friends between 8-9PM.  Apparently, Kathy’s boyfriend Randy called the police because he felt they were making too much noise.  Did you follow that?  Someone who wasn’t the homeowner was having a pool party, and someone next door who was also not a homeowner complained.  And the kicker is that the party with the loud noise was at 9PM.  Come on – really? 

Mezger went off on Randy, “You called the cops on my grandkids at 9 o’clock?  You’re not even the fucking owner.  You’re stuck with a fucking bald dyke who Donald Trump kinda put the heat on.  Now you’re calling the cops?  Fuck you, and fuck Kathy.  You’re not our fucking neighbor.  You’re a fucking asshole.”  So, let’s first explain the “bald dyke” business.  A month ago, Kathy shaved her head in support of her sister who had cancer and was undergoing chemotherapy.  P.S.  Her sister died days before the incident with Mezger.  We know all these details because the Huffington Post got an audio recording of the altercation and published it.  Mezger has since apologized for the language – perhaps because his company slashed his substantial bonus and threatened to remove him from office if there is one more piece of bad press.

Leave it to The View to shake up their cast days into the new season.  Last week, Jedediah Bila announced she was leaving the show – effective immediately.  While Bila had the balls to not say it was her choice, she also didn’t go so far as to say she was fired.  But make no mistake – she was pushed out the door.  Although the initial word on the street was the ABC brass axed her after asking Hillary Clinton some tough questions, that isn’t the case.  Days before Bila’s departure, Meghan McCain announced she was leaving Fox News.  The View has always wanted to bring McCain on as a permanent guest host because she is a high-profile conservative.  While Bila is also conservative, they feel her being a Libertarian was simply confusing.  They began clandestine negotiations with Meghan, which Bila got wind of.  She went to the top and asked if the McCain negotiations would affect her.  “Oh, you weren’t supposed to find out this way.”  Oops!  We hear the network graciously said Jed could stay with the show until the deal with McCain was finalized.  Instead, Jed opted to leave that day.  And so, as has happened many times in the past, Jedediah Bila said all the right things, and just slipped away.  But not before hearing that View mantra – “You’re welcomed back anytime!”

Anyone looking for a graceful way to handle exiting co-hosts should look no further than The Talk.  Only a few weeks after Aisha Tyler left, she actually was welcomed back – and as a guest co-host.  Last week, she slid back into her old chair effortlessly and everything was smooth as silk.  Of course, she left of her own accord.

For the first time in eons, I wasn’t at the Emmy Awards.  In fact, I wasn’t in the country.  But through the miracle of modern technology, I didn’t miss a beat – even in a minor Eastern European city.  Even there, people knew who RuPaul was and enjoyed her turn as “Emmy”.  I surely wasn’t the only one who thought Jane Fonda‘s homage to I Dream of Jeannie was inspired, and cringed a bit when Cicely Tyson wandered out to the wrong side of the stage (alas, it only got worse).  Personally, I think she was disoriented by the sight of Anika Noni Rose‘s breasts.  Girl, put those things away – this ain’t the Golden Globes!

But the highlight for me was watching the fabulous Jackie “Mamacita” Hoffman lose to Laura Dern.  Most also-rans put on their game face.  Not Hoffman, who clearly mouthed “Damn it!”  The subsequent Tweets were a little bit of heaven.  “Laura Dern had famous parents.  Forgive me for being from real people,” said Hoffman.  In case people took Jackie seriously, her next Tweets should have put the matter to rest.  “I hear that Laura Dern runs a child porn ring.”  And “I hear Laura Dern looted art from Nazi victims.”

Some fans wrote in asking what the blue ribbons meant.  They are in support of the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) and protecting people’s constitutional rights.  Others wondered if Sofia Vergara and Joe Manganiello have broken up since she walked the red carpet with a much younger man.  People, get your minds out of the gutter.  That was her son, Manolo – yes, named after the shoe!  Sofia ALWAYS brings a large contingency with her to award shows, and since Joe wasn’t around, Manolo walked his mom down the carpet – as he has many times in the past.  If you want to see a bit more of the 26-year-old Latino, check out BillyMasters.com.

Speaking of hot guys, the acclaimed UK production of A Clockwork Orange has finally made it to New York.  This all-male version is opening off-Broadway at the New World Stages on September 25th.  I heard about this a few months ago from a fan who saw it at the Edinburgh Festival and was taken with the ridiculously hot leading man, Jonno Davies.  Davies has been with the show since its origin in Norway, and happily he has crossed the pond with it.  The cast is filled with gorgeous guys and is kinda like a live version of Fight Club, where unspeakable things happen to him in the prison shower.  But why tell you when you can see it for yourself on BillyMasters.com.

Time for another season of The X Factor UK.  Once again, Simon Cowell, Sharon Osbourne and Louis Walsh make the ultimate trio of judges.  And, Nicole Scherzinger is fine (she’s growing on me).  While I am typically not a fan of the early audition process, The X Factor does it in a way that is far less exploitative than other shows.  But, since we’re all for a little bit of exploitation, let’s talk about the hot twins from Greece.  Phillip and Achilles make up Pretty Boy Karma and, well, they’re not particularly talented.  But they are kinda hot – picture Justin Bieber with a learning disability (not much of a stretch).  These twins claim to have started out singing in the shower – let that sink in.  They sang terribly, but lifted their shirts and showed off their abs, so they won my vote.  Alas, the real judges said no.  But they’re still worth checking out on BillyMasters.com.

I’m sure you’ve heard that the 2024 Summer Olympics will be held in Paris, and the 2028 Games will take place in Los Angeles – like we don’t have enough traffic.  But many people are wondering if the Olympics have lost some of their luster.  Attendance for the past few Olympics have been disappointing, and even TV viewership has lagged.  Sam Mikulak, Team USA‘s all-around gymnastic champ, has the perfect idea for turning things around – let the athletes compete shirtless!  “People make fun of us for wearing tights.  But if they saw how yoked we are maybe that would make a difference.”  He’s made this suggestion before, but I’ve got an even better idea.  Let’s get back to the Olympics‘ roots and have the athletes compete as they did in the original games – naked! 

The View hosted a deeply religious enclave to celebrate the 25th anniversary of Sister Act.  Whoopi Goldberg decided not only to reunite with members of the cast, but also perform with them live – for the first time ever.  Kathy Najimy, Beth Fowler and several of the other nuns were on hand (and in habit) for a spirited rendition of “I Will Follow Him”, accompanied by musical genius Marc Shaiman.  Check it out on BillyMasters.com.

Speaking of hot guys, Charlie from Dallas sent in the following Ask Billy question: “Remember that hot NYC cop who was gonna pose for Playgirl?  I heard there are some nude photos of him.  Could you track them down?”

I suspect the guy you are talking about is Miguel Pimentel, who garnered quite a bit of interest with some mega-hot photos on social media in 2015.  At the time, Daniel Nardicio from Playgirl approached him.  “He’s expressed interest in meeting and talking about it.  It would have to be full frontal.”  Pimentel felt he would have to take a leave of absence from the force, so Nardicio offered him $45K – the equivalent of a year’s salary.  Alas, Miguel turned him down and we never got to see the goods – until now.  Allegedly, he was taking a selfie at home and “accidentally” posted two nude photos of himself – complete with an erection!  He promptly deleted the pics, but not before our spies grabbed them.  And, of course, you can see ’em on BillyMasters.com.

When cops are sticking ’em up, it’s definitely time to end yet another column.  Although I’m still overseas, my thoughts are with everyone living through all this crazy weather.  If you’re looking for any port in the storm, check out www.BillyMasters.com, the site that’s known its share of seamen!  If you have a question, send it along to me at Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before someone casts Pimentel on the new Will & Grace as a stripper!  Until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

Everyone had been speculating what would happen once Bette Midler left Broadway‘s Hello, Dolly.  After Carol Channing departed, the original production lasted for six years led by such luminaries as Phyllis Diller, Betty Grable, Ethel Merman, Martha Raye, Ginger Rogers, and even Pearl Bailey.  Alas, we live in different times, and there aren’t quite as many Dollys out there with the necessary name recognition and box-office clout.  I hardly expect Scott Rudin to put millions of dollars behind the serviceable talents of such regional Dollys as Vicki Lewis or Sally Struthers.  So, the casting of Bernadette Peters as Bette’s replacement is not only inevitable but expected.  Midler leaves on January 14th.  The show will shut down for a week.  Then Peters begins previews on January 20th and officially opens on February 22nd.  And she won’t be alone.  When Bette leaves, she takes David Hyde Pierce with her.  So, the new Horace Vandergelder will be the dashing Victor Garber.  If anyone is keeping track, this production touts two queer icons playing Dolly and two gay men playing Horace.  That’s gotta count for something.

By the way, when Bette leaves Dolly, she’ll also be taking her alternate with her.  Donna Murphy has been doing all of the Tuesday night shows, a handful of Sundays, and scattered weeks here and there when the Divine Miss M needed a nap.  Bernadette has announced that she’ll be playing all eight shows a week.

Rami Malek from Mr. Robot just began playing Freddie Mercury in the long-delayed biopic about the band Queen.  Actually, director Bryan Singer has eschewed the term “biopic”, saying that it’s a celebration of the band’s music.  The film is expected to solely chronicle the time Queen was active – from its inception in 1970 to their performance at Live Aid in 1985, six years before Mercury’s death.  A photo of Malek as Mercury during the iconic concert has been leaked and, while he looks better than anticipated, I can’t help but feel the previously attached Sacha Baron Cohen would have been a more effortless fit.  Decide for yourself on BillyMasters.com.

“And now we go back to Chris Cuomo.  He’s on the docks and
looks like it’s taking quite a pounding!” 
– Anderson Cooper tossing it back to Cuomo during CNN‘s Hurricane Irma
coverage – each in tight, wet shirts.  Alas, no pounding was shown.

Our Ask Billy question is about one of our favorite subjects.  Harry in Miami writes, “What are all these nude photos of Colton Haynes and his hot boyfriend I keep hearing about?”

First, we must correct you – not boyfriend, but fiancé.  Actually, several notable outlets have referred to the couple as married.  Sigh – remember the good old days when you could call a gay couple whatever you wanted?  Be that as it may, Colton and Jeff Leatham were vacationing in Turks (or was it Caicos) when they decided to throw the whole wind into the caution and cavort in the moonlight au naturale.  Nothing wrong with that.  And they decided to take photos of each other.  Sure, why not?  And then they decided to post them on Instagram.  Of course they did!  And you can see them on BillyMasters.com.

When we’re still talking about Moonlight six months after the Oscars, it’s definitely time to end yet another column.  Who’d have thought we’d top the recent eclipse of the sun with a couple of full moons.  As I pondered those photos I thought – how sad.  Two hot bottoms and not a top in sight.  But, showbiz is a fickle mistress.  You’re much better off sticking to www.BillyMasters.com, the site that’s versatile.  And if you have a question, just dash it off to Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before I track down those Vogue Italia cover models!  So, until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

It’s amazing what a difference a few months can make.  Days before Memorial Day, photos of Kathy Griffin holding a bloody Trump mask made news around the globe.  On June 2nd, the now-infamous press conference took place where Griffin apologized and cried how she was broken and her career was ruined.  Fast forward three months to Labor Day, and Kathy is embarking on her first world tour – the Laugh Your Head Off Tour.  She’s also rescinding her apology.  “I’m no longer sorry.  The whole outrage was BS.  The whole thing got so blown out of proportion,” Kathy told the Australian morning show Sunrise.  When the interviewer asked if the photo crossed the line, Griffin said, “No, you’re full of crap.  Stop this.  You know this.  Stop acting like my little picture is more important than talking about the actual atrocities that the president of the United States is committing.”

In a long and detailed interview with The Cut, Griffin made even more revelations.  She says everyone around her told her to cancel the press conference, and she now regrets doing it.  “None of the points I wanted to make in that press conference came across because I saw I was a victim and acted like a victim.  I take responsibility for that.”  She also revealed the status of her relationship with former friend Anderson Cooper.  Yes, I said former friend.  According to Kathy, Coop didn’t contact her after the photos went public.  He didn’t contact her after she tearfully spoke about him during the press conference.  And he didn’t contact her before July 26th, when he told Andy Cohen on Watch What Happens Live that their friendship was intact.  According to Kathy, while four of Anderson’s CNN colleagues repeatedly checked in on her, she didn’t hear from the erstwhile Vanderbilt until August 10th.  On that day, he reached out via text.  She responded that their friendship is over.

Last week, Disneyland Paris dashed the dreams of a young British boy.  The Disneyland Hotel has a Princess for a Day package and a mom from Devon, England bought it for her 3-year-old son as a Christmas gift.  “I knew that there would be NOTHING he’d love more than to get to wear a pretty dress, put make up on like Mummy does and have his photo taken being one of his beloved Disney Princesses.”  This is how the package is officially described: “Grant every little girl’s wish with a real Princess’s make-up and hair-styling session; a fairytale transformation they’ll treasure forever.”  The mom submitted a request for her son to be “transformed” into Elsa from Frozen, saying that her son dresses like Elsa “all day every day”.  Alas, things didn’t work out as planned.

The mom got an e-mail back stating that “at this time it is not possible to book Princess for a Day for a boy”.  Mum brought up an excellent point.  “If a little girl went to Disneyland and wanted to do a pirate experience or a Spider-Man experience, there would be no way that they would stop a girl from doing that because there would be an uproar.  So why is it different for a boy?”  Why, indeed.  Once she posted all of this on social media, Disneyland Paris apologized.  “An isolated incident, the cast member’s response is not reflective of any policy or belief held here at Disneyland Paris.  We are going to ensure this does not happen again…Of course, both boys and girls are welcome to enjoy the Princess for a Day experience in addition to all our other special activities.”

This week, I get to check something off my bucket list that I didn’t even know was on the list – your beloved Billy is winging his way to the Venice Film Festival.  And that’s Venice as in Italy, not Venice as in Muscle Beach – where I’ve checked off numerous things in the past.  It’s a fortuitous week for me to be heading to fair Italia.  The September issue of Vogue Italia just hit the stands, and it features a same-sex kiss on its cover.  It actually features a couple of same-sex kisses.  There are three variants of the cover – one between two men, one between two women, and one of those boring heterosexual couples.  They all have the same caption – “Bacio”, which simply means “Kiss”.  I have no idea if the September issue of Vogue Italia has the same seismic power as the US version.  After all, I did see The September Issue.  But I’m fairly confident Anna Wintour has nothing to do with the Italian publication.  Well, nothing directly.  Her daughter, Bee Shaffer, is engaged to Francesco Carrozzini, who is the son of late former editor-in-chief Franca Sozzani.  I guess I’m not the only one who enjoys a foreign tongue.

Since I’m filing this prior to my departure, I must confess some trepidation regarding our next story.  Several news outlets have reported about a sign in a Cavallino hotel.  Apparently, the bathroom is marked “Donne, Uomini, Gay” – Women, Men, Gay.  I suppose it should go without saying that there is a drawing illustrating each term.  Due to the scrutiny, the owner of the hotel in this southern Italian town says the sign will be repainted.  Heaven knows what it would be replaced with – especially since “cavallino” means a small horse!  Or is it a small guy riding a horse?  Either way, it should make a festive sign!

Hundreds (and I do mean hundreds) of you have been writing to me asking if I have Tiger Woods‘ penis.  I swear, I never touched it, never wanted to.  But, you know, different strokes – HA!  Apparently some pics were stolen by a hacker who got into Hope Solo‘s phone (P.S.  If you’re a straight man reading this and have the chance to go anywhere near Hope’s vagina, put on a hazmat suit first).  Anyway, yes, I’ve got the photo.  Yes, I think many of you would like to see it.  So, sure, I’ll put it on BillyMasters.com.

On Broadway, some people are coming and some people are going.  Ben Platt has taken Broadway by storm with his sensational portrayal of the title role in Dear Evan Hansen.  But, all good things must come to an end.  He’ll be leaving the show on November 19.  So, who will be the next Evan Hansen?  As it turns out, two people – one I’m happy about, one I’m reserving judgment on.  The first one is Noah Galvin, late of The Real O’Neals, the one who gave that loathsome interview to Vulture where he basically trashed his colleagues, his work, Colton Haynes, and (worst of all) his fans.  He may be a name, but a somewhat tarnished one.  That said, perhaps he’s a lovely boy who has grown up and will do a good job.  Still, I wouldn’t be waiting by the stage door to meet him.

Happily, he’ll be holding the spot for a real star – Taylor Trensch.  Taylor is currently appearing opposite Bette Midler in the revival of Hello, Dolly! as Barnaby.  His scenes are a HOOT, and he really deserves this break.  And he’s cute as a button (not like I collect buttons or anything).  Didya know that his real-life beau is Max Crumm, who we first met during that TV show trying to find leads for the Broadway production of Grease.

Proving you can’t keep a funny lady down, Kathy Griffin has announced a world tour, appropriately titled Laugh Your Head Off.  And it is truly a world tour.  It kicks off in New Zealand on October 19th and then continues to Australia and Singapore before shifting to Europe and wrapping up in Iceland.  ‘Cause until you play Reykjavik, you haven’t played the top.

“You need some manners ‘bruh’.  I didn’t need to stop to take that picture with you. 
Just rude.  Very rude.” 
– The diminutive Nick Jonas responds to a Tweet from Zak Hanzal, who posted a photo he took
with Jonas on the street with the caption, “@NickJonas u need a few more inches bruhh.” 
We can only pray Nick has those extra inches where they count.

Since Aaron Carter‘s bisexual admission, he decided it would be good to put his talent where his mouth (presumably) has been.  So he booked himself a gig in a gay bar – Hamburger Mary’s in Tampa, Florida.  Tickets were $10, and far be it from me to point out that the burgers cost more!  He had the predictable crying, apologizing, scattered presence which has endeared him to many a crowd.  He also did single out several guys in the audience.  “That motherfucker right there is gorgeous.  You’re gorgeous.  He’s kinda cute.  It is what it is.  I am who I am.”  But who are the people he was looking at?  I wanna see photos of them.

Intriguingly enough, days after coming out as bisexual, Aaron aggressively began pursuing Chloë Grace Moretz.  Thus far, he’s twice asked her out on Twitter.  Wake me when he starts Tweeting the Jonas Brothers.

Aaron’s ex Madison Parker would like us to know she didn’t break up with him because she’s homophobic.  “My split with Aaron has nothing to do with him being bisexual.  Our parting of ways is something that has been coming for some time and it’s the best thing for us both.  Some of my closest friends and loved ones are of the LGBTQ community, people I love and support wholeheartedly, so for anyone to label me ‘homophobic’ is appalling and hurtful and couldn’t be more off character.  I’ve been nothing but supportive of Aaron and his career and I’m happy for him that he’s having the courage to live his truth.”  But did she spend $10 to listen to him while eating a burger?

To continue his journey into the gay community, Carter showed up at the Project Angel Food Gala in Los Angeles last weekend.  The organization, which provides meals to people living with HIV, chose Aaron to present an award to the group’s founder, Marianne Williamson.  Aaron showed up in a head-to-toe, voluminous white faux fur coat.  When asked about his fashion choice, he said, “I’ve always dressed like this.  It’s just, I’m bringing it back now.  I’ve always been kind of out there I guess.”  He posed on the red carpet with Adam Lambert, who was barely noticed.

When Aaron is eclipsing Adam, it’s definitely time to end yet another column.  See how I tied that into this whole eclipse frenzy?  No need for clouds in our coffee – we’ve got Aaron Carter on www.BillyMasters.com – the site you can view with the naked eye.  If you have a question for me, send it along to me at Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before Boy George’s show is designed by Bob Mackie!  So, until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

The newly bald (read last week’s column) Kathy Griffin has gone public about some shenanigans that happened behind the scenes of her Trump-inspired fatwa.  The funny lady reports that after the fallout of her photo stunt, a member of CBS‘s board of directors sent her an e-mail instructing her how to smooth things over.  The unnamed person told her to send a letter (not an e-mail) to the President begging for forgiveness, admitting she does not deserve this forgiveness, and to basically grovel.  She was also advised to only leak the letter to FOX News – so they’d have the scoop.  Needless to say, she didn’t take that advice.