There’s all sorts of drama happening at the O’Donnell home.  From what we can piece together, it all started in 1997.  That was when Deanna Micoley put her 2-month-old daughter Kayla up for adoption.  According to Deanna, she signed the consent documents while high on drugs and under pressure of her then-husband.  She also alleges that the adoptive mother knew the condition she was in.  That adoptive mother was Rosie O’Donnell, and Kayla soon became Chelsea O’Donnell.  In the intervening years, Chelsea has been trying to find her biological parents.  Somehow she got in touch with Deanna’s father last November.  Since then, Deanna and Chelsea/Kayla have been in contact via text and Facebook messages.  Allegedly, O’Donnell tried to stop this communication and had some heated exchanges with Deanna.  One text from Rosie says, “Get any lawyers u want.  It was all legal.  Like it or not.  Now stop.”  When Deanna went public with the story, Rosie’s publicist said that Rosie “encouraged and supported Chelsea’s desire to communicate with her birth mother.”

Fast forward to last month when Rosie revealed that Chelsea had been missing for a week with her service dog.  On August 18th, Chelsea was found with 25-year-old Steven Sheerer, a man she allegedly met on Tinder and who has a record for heroin possession.  According to reports, Sheerer sent Chelsea a nude photo of himself, and since she was only 17 at the time, he was charged with third-degree distribution of obscenity to a minor and third-degree endangering the welfare of a child.  Six days after the police brought her home, Chelsea turned 18 and became a legal adult.  Rosie’s publicist made another statement: “Chelsea made a decision when she turned 18 that she wanted to go to her birth mother.  That was her choice.”  But it wasn’t quite so placid.  We hear that Rosie refused to give Chelsea her birth certificate or Social Security card and threatened to cut her off financially if she left.  And yet, off she went.  Deanna drove from Wisconsin to pick up Chelsea/Kayla and told reporters, “Leave my daughter out of Rosie’s stuff.”  To be continued.good kind.

Over this column’s long history, the line between celebrity and porn has been blurred beyond recognition.  While prostitution and porn are not necessarily the same thing, there is an indisputable connection.  Last week, the offices of the largest gay escort website, Rentboy.com, were raided in New York City and seven employees were arrested.  But this raid wasn’t solely carried out by the NYPD.  The website was being investigated by the Department of Homeland Security.  Huh?  Is ISIS trying to infiltrate the US through hot male hookers?  Was Bin Laden the Al-Qaeda equivalent of Heidi Fleiss?  Maybe they’re housing a sleeper cell!  The official complaint was filed by special agent Susan Ruiz, and she spends an inordinate amount of time defining terms such as twink, scat, fisting, and out rate.  Here’s an example: “I have learned that a sling, also known as a ‘sex sling’, is a device that allows two people to have sex while one is suspended.”  If nothing else, we’ve surely enriched Ruiz’s education.

Ironically, this bust comes a week after Rentboy launched a scholarship program.  In announcing the Cash4Class Fund, Rentboy‘s CEO (one of the people arrested, FYI) said, “This isn’t about the adult industry educating its own cohort group. The fact of the matter is that large numbers of students are already turning to sex work to help pay for tuition, room and board, and long-term student loan bills.”  Admittedly, the scholarship amount was a paltry $1,500 – barely enough to pay for books…or a mildly effective defense attorney!

For years, Bette Midler has bemoaned the fact that Disney hasn’t made a sequel to Hocus Pocus.  Whenever asked about it, she says, “Inundate the Disney Company, because I have canvassed the girls and they are willing to do it, but we have no say in it, so if you want a Hocus Pocus 2, ask the Walt Disney Company“.  Because the film is so popular at Halloween, Disney World is staging a live show featuring the Sanderson Sisters alongside other Disney villains.  The Hocus Pocus Villain Spelltacular runs from September 15 through November 1st.

Of course, this is not exactly what Midler had in mind.  To show the studio what she envisioned, she’s staged her own mini Hocus Pocus: Live as part of her latest tour.  While chorus girls are filling in for Kathy Najimy and Sarah Jessica Parker, Bette is in full Winifred drag and belts out “I Put a Spell On You”.  We’ll run a video of it on our website, just so you can see how divine it is.

Taye Diggs has the distinction of not only being the first Hedwig of color on Broadway, but also the Hedwig to close the show on September 13th.  Producer David Binder was philosophical about the news: “When we announced our limited 16-week Broadway engagement of Hedwig, never in my wildest dreams did I think it would run for a year and a half.”  Ticket sales for Diggs have not been particularly encouraging, and reviews for his performance have been decidedly mixed.  NJ.com gave the Newark native a glowing review, titling their piece, “Why Taye Diggs might be the best Hedwig yet.”  However, the New York Post called their review, “Taye Diggs is a drag in Hedwig & the Angry Inch – and not the good kind.”  What I find most interesting is his appearance.  I remember how Neil Patrick Harris actually took weight off his lithe frame to convincingly play the role.  Most of the other Hedwigs did the same.  From the photos of Diggs in his scanties, he looks rather, well, large.  Then again, what do I know?  The Post calls him “buff”, but I’d call him enormous…and not the good kind.

I hate to make this all about me.  But, you know, the column is called Billy Masters, and I am Billy Masters.  For the time being, let’s put that aside.  You’d think, after all these years, I would have tackled every conceivable topic.  In fact, that’s what I thought while reading the old columns (which are on BillyMasters.com).  And yet, I don’t believe I’ve ever written a story about somebody being “fingered”.  Oh, yes, “fingered”.  Dare I say, we’re going to rectify that right now with not one, but two stories about fingering.  The first story comes from Big Brother.  Apparently, this guy named Austin “fingered” his girlfriend, Liz, during the live feed.  I checked out the footage and it does appear that Austin played a little hide and seek with a few digits – perhaps up to the elbow!

Fingering Story #2 (and that’s certainly the right name for it) comes from singer Morrissey.  Last week, he told Larry King that he was fingered by the TSA.  I’m shocked – and somewhat hurt.  I travel more than anyone I know.  And nobody has ever come close to my anus – well, not until we’ve left the ground and I’ve slid the word Ocupado into place.  Morrissey says, “I had been through the full scanner and the second bit, but then he went straight for my private bits and then put his finger down my rear cleavage.”  Welcome to the friendly skies, indeed.

Speaking of the openly gay star of Empire, a source confirmed that the nude photo I have of Jussie Smollett is most definitely legit. In the words of my mouthpiece, “I couldn’t sit down for a week.” I’m surprised he didn’t have lockjaw! You can check out Smollett’s double digits at BillyMasters.com.

Another Fashion Police alum recently found herself in hot water. Kelly Osbourne was co-hosting one of the last live episodes of The View this season. In the midst of discussing Donald Trump‘s racist comments, Osbourne quipped, “If you kick every Latino out of this country, then who is going to be cleaning your toilet, Donald Trump?” Unfortunately, she happened to be sitting next to Rosie Perez. Kelly quickly tried to backtrack: “In a sense, you know what I mean? In LA, they always…” Rosie cut her off, saying, “Latinos are not the only people doing that.” Osbourne said, “I didn’t mean it like that. Come on, I would never mean it like that.” An ironic moment, given Osbourne famously resigned from Fashion Police after Giuliana made a joke perceived as racist.

Whoopi quickly went to a commercial and Kelly burst into tears, horrified that people might think she’s a racist. We’re told that producers asked Perez to smooth things over. During the next segment, Rosie awkwardly apologized to Kelly. But that wasn’t enough. At the end of the show, Rosie once again said, “I want to apologize to this young woman once again for being very sensitive. Kelly Osbourne is on our side and I was sensitive and my disdain should go to only Donald Trump. Sorry, darling.” Perez said what ABC wanted, but she was done. Despite having two episodes left to tape, she cleared out her dressing room and quickly left. Not surprisingly, many in the Latino community chastised Perez – what on Earth was she apologizing for? Even Kelly Tweeted, “I F***ED UP!” Rosie responded with a Tweet of her own: “I tweeted at #KellyOsbourne in an effort to help keep her from spiraling after her unfortunate comment. I went overboard with my apology – #mybad. But I don’t apologize for speaking up and calling her on it – mistake or not, it was offensive. And please don’t ever question my support for mi gente… Ever.” The cover-up continues. ABC has removed the footage from their website. Thank God you can see it on BillyMasters.com.

Cho also revealed that she will be joining E!‘s Fashion Police. Actually, the FP gig is only a guest spot for the first show on August 31st. The current plan is for each episode to feature three regular panelists – Melissa Rivers, Giuliana Rancic, and Brad Goreski – and two guest stars. Cho and NeNe Leakes will be the first guests.

But here’s a scoop you won’t hear anywhere else – after Joan Rivers died, the frontrunner to replace her was Margaret Cho! She had several meetings with E! and was told it was a done deal. What happened? Kathy Griffin, that’s what. Cho’s dear friend campaigned for the job and made it clear that she was Rivers’ anointed successor. I should note that both Cho and Griffin were extremely close with Auntie Joan. While Rivers identified with Griffin, she greatly admired Cho’s attention to detail, craftsmanship, and how seriously she took fine-tuning a routine on the road. But one cannot underestimate Griffin’s popularity, and that clinched it for E! After Kathy left and Fashion Police had to be rebuilt from scratch, I’m told Cho was the first person the network called. It will be interesting to see how Margaret fits in.

Because we can never have enough male nudity, I’m sure you’re all familiar with the dick heard ’round the world. That ponderous penis belonged to singer Lenny Kravitz. During a concert in Stockholm, the singer squatted down while wearing skin-tight leather pants. And before you can say Jack Robinson in Swedish, his pants split at the crotch, exposing his privates along with some hardware. While Steven Tyler refers to it as pierced, I believe Kravitz is actually wearing a cock ring. You can decide for yourself when you check out the enhanced video and photo on BillyMasters.com.

This leads perfectly into our Ask Billy question. Henry in Hollywood writes, “After reading your review of Bent [at Los Angeles‘ Mark Taper Forum] and seeing your footage of Jake Shears, I quickly snapped up a ticket. I loved it. But you didn’t mention that gorgeous naked guy at the beginning of the show. WOW – what a stud. And what a beautiful dick. I can’t believe you didn’t get that for your website.”

You and me both. Most certainly, Tom Berklund is a fine actor. But that is somewhat eclipsed by his amazing body and enormous penis – and a semi-hard penis at that. Alas, not even I had the hubris to try and capture it for posterity. That would be like biting the penis that feeds me (would that that were true). I was fairly sure that Mr. Berklund’s penis would be one of those things you see once in your life and then wonder if it was real – like Bigfoot, or a hit movie starring the Olsen twins. And then, POOF, his penis popped up in my inbox. No, that is not a euphemism. It was sent to me by an enthusiastic and industrious fan who was giving me the exclusive. I haven’t gotten this excited about a stage penis since Steven Weber virtually poked my eye out with his. This one is every inch as impressive – no Visine required. You must check it out at BillyMasters.com.

Benedict Cumberbatch is getting rave reviews for his turn as Hamlet in London’s West End. There’s only one problem – the show hasn’t opened yet! In a flagrant disregard for protocol, to say nothing of common decency, two of London’s leading papers surreptitiously sent critics to see the very first preview and review it. So, these reviews are based on the actors’ first run-through in front of a live audience. Yes, it’s lovely that they were raves. But who do you people think you are? Me? Cumberbatch personally met with fans after a performance asking that they NOT film portions of the performance. “I can’t give you what I want to give you, which is a live performance that hopefully you will remember in your minds and brains – whether it’s good, bad or indifferent – rather than on your phones. So please don’t.” To get the message out, he’s asked people to “Tweet, blog, hashtag the shit out of this one for me.” He added that the theatre staff would “detect and evict” people illegally filming.

This week we have a plethora of penii. I almost called them a gaggle – but I know better than to underestimate my fans’ gag reflex! While that surely whets your appetite, we’re going to start in what I hope is a different direction. Our first story comes out of Japan, where a gaggle of gals are getting the vapors in the presence of a gorilla! Ladies are spending most of their free time at the Higashiyama Zoo and Botanical Gardens in Nagoya to see Shabani, the gorilla. A zoo spokesperson is quoted as saying, “He is more buff than most gorillas and he’s at his peak physically. We’ve seen a rise in the number of female visitors – women say he’s very good-looking.” And you know what’s crazy? Shabani really is kinda hot – I get it. OK, so he’s also pretty hairy – but I’m not entirely convinced I haven’t slept with someone hairier!

Our Ask Billy question comes from Randy in Providence, RI: “The guy who plays Hunter on Under the Dome is beyond adorable. What do you know about him? With that face and that body, he’s gotta play for our team.”

First, let me say how virtually unwatchable Under the Dome has become. That doesn’t mean I’ve stopped watching. But it seems clear to me that they’re making it up as they go along. While Max Ehrich (who plays Hunter) pinged for me last year, that shot of him in his undies for this year’s season premiere was almost seismic. I remember him from his days on The Young and the Restless as the young Fenmore Baldwin. When he joined the soap, rumor had it the character would come out of the closet. That didn’t happen, but given Ehrich’s circle of friends in real life, I don’t think it would have been a stretch. At the time, someone Tweeted Max asking if he was dating Chris Colfer. The response was “haha no. He’s a friend.” When someone mentioned it was a rumor, he replied, “I find rumors humorous. Especially when they are so far from the truth.” When another fan asked “please be my gay friend, I’m looking for one,” Max said, “I respect that, but I don’t roll that way.” Maybe, maybe not. Until then, enjoy some sexy pics we’ll post of him on BillyMasters.com.

People were shocked to see Chi Chi LaRue‘s longtime retail outlet on the Boulevard shut down. Fear not, WeHoians – the sexporium is not closing. It’s just moving. The new location will be the space formerly occupied by Showtime Clothing, which means Chi Chi will be nestled between two of the hottest clubs in West Hollywood – Mickey’s and Fiesta Cantina.  The new location is slated to open later this month.

Of course, Chi Chi isn’t overseeing the move. That’s because the legendary porn directrix is in the Hazelden/Betty Ford Center in Minnesota. As one might expect, this is a pricey facility, and LaRue is having a tough time making ends meet – ironic since she’s made a career of putting meat and ends together. To help, friends have started yet another of those wildly popular crowdfunding campaigns. The target is $40K, and in one week’s time, friends and fans have come up with a quarter of that. Despite LaRue’s assertion that any extra money will go to help others in need of treatment, this particular campaign has received oodles of criticism – criticism that is regularly deleted from the official site. If you’d like to donate, go to GoFundMe.com/f78g2sx68g.

Last week, my pal Leslie Jordan found himself in a situation which required his unique skills of diplomacy. It happened at a popular Starbucks on Santa Monica Boulevard in West Hollywood – in short, one of the gayest Starbucks on the planet. Allegedly, three young men came in and started yelling anti-gay expletives at the customers. After the manager asked them to leave, the situation escalated, and the guys started calling everyone “fucking faggots”. Leslie stood tall and yelled, “Shut the fuck up! Not in my house, not in my neighborhood!” He made sure the guys left, and the fracas continued outside when one of the hooligans lunged toward him! Being a man of peace (to say nothing of a piece of man),  Jordan threw his drink in the guy’s face! And, it was not coffee, as other outlets have reported.  “Honey, it was sweet iced tea!”  We hear it took the arrival of the police to calm the situation. In fact, 10 police cars arrived on the scene! That’s an awful lot of excitement for a weekday in WeHo.

Very often, symbols with positive connotations are used against people. The swastika was primarily known as an ancient good luck symbol used in Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism, Odinism, and who knows how many other isms. But once the Nazis co-opted it, it became a universal sign of evil, and I doubt it will be rehabilitated any time soon. And of course, we recently saw the strong emotions still elicited by the Confederate flag. Despite attempts to reclaim it as a symbol of Southern gentility, the scars of slavery linger on.

I was thinking about this when I went to see Martin Sherman‘s play Bent at the Mark Taper Forum. In it, we see how the Nazis forced gay people to wear the pink triangle to identify themselves. Yet somehow, the pink triangle has evolved. When I came out in the mid-’80s, they were all the rage. People wore them on T-shirts, jewelry, and they adorned banners at gay pride parades. It is said that Sherman’s play helped gay people take this symbol of shame and reclaim it as one of pride…which would surely fit in with the timeline I remember. There’s a lesson to be learned there. This revival of Bent was powerfully presented under the steady hand of Moisés Kaufman. The production was evocative, and special plaudits must go to the sound and lighting design, which heightened the emotional struggle being depicted. While the play itself may not pack the wallop it did in 1979 (featuring Sir Ian McKellen in London and Richard Gere on Broadway), the cast was universally excellent. The ensemble was led by Patrick Heusinger and Charlie Hofheimer, who were never less than riveting, particularly in the second act. One must admire the truncated, but still heartbreaking, work of a blond Andy Mientus. As to the much-ballyhooed professional stage acting debut of Jake Shears, it was a case of much ado about nothing. The song he performed (and composed) was totally fine, if not vocally challenging. And he cuts a dashing presence onstage. But his stage time is remarkably brief. As an actor, he certainly held his own – no small feat given the strong cast. And to prove my point, a source leaked me a video of his entire scene from the play, which I’ll post for you exclusively on BillyMasters.com.

Our Ask Billy question comes from Karl in Chicago: “I just saw photos of Nick Jonas looking hotter than f*ck performing at some gay club all chained up. What’s that all about?”

Little Nick Jonas is continuing in his quest for world domination – or at least the part of the world belonging to Justin Timberlake – by conquering it one gay bar at a time. This was his second performance at the legendary G-A-Y party at Heaven in London. And what made it memorable was that he sang his single “Chains” whilst actually chained up by drag queens! “You know, we’ve gotta do something special for the G-A-Y audience, right?” Right! He looked hotter than ever (oooh, those arms) – as you’ll see when you watch the video BillyMasters.com.

Since we’re talking hot foreign guys, let’s turn our attention to Luke Casey, an Australian footballer and model. For reasons completely unknown to me, Australians appear to enjoy being photographed au naturale – and who am I to complain? The sexy 20-year-old stripped down for a photographer, and apparently shaved down as well, since he appears to have all the pubic hair of a newborn. Of course, this only accentuates every nook and cranny of his fantastic physique. Let me add that what he may be lacking in the flaccid penile department, he certainly makes up for in foreskin – if that’s your thing. You can decide for yourself when you see him on BillyMasters.com.

Gay porn star Harry Louis got engaged on live television to Allyson Chinalia, often referred to as his “look-alike boyfriend.” They were on a TV show in Spain when Harry popped the question. It may be in Spanish, but I’ve been watching Caso Cerrado on Telemundo for two years, so I’m virtually bilingual. For those of you who lack a foreign tongue, Harry sweetly Tweeted the announcement in two languages. And he shared a sentiment I’m sure anyone who has been in love will understand: “I have no words to express how much I love you @allysonchinalia !!! I also love doughnuts, but you are sweeter…” Nothing says I love you more than complimenting some guy’s cruller! We’ll post the video and some hot shots of the sexy couple on BillyMasters.com.

There are pros and cons to being in the public eye. Rugby player Ben Cohen has used his popularity to speak out against bullying and started The Ben Cohen StandUp Foundation. But last week, he found himself the target of some nastiness. As a professional athlete, Cohen has always maintained a good, if not slightly burly, physique. On July 22nd, he posted some less-than-flattering shots of himself frolicking on the beach with the caption, “Eaten way [too] many burgers. Need to get back into shape!! Or maybe it was just the camera angle. LOL.” Two days later, the same photos turned up in the UK Telegraph accompanying an article called “How to avoid a Middle Age Man Spread” with the subheading, “As former rugby player Ben Cohen is photographed looking portlier than usual, experts reveal how men can avoid piling on those extra kilos.” Ouch! But Ben owned it, reTweeting the piece with the following caption: “Thanks for the advice @Telegraph How to avoid a Middle Age Spread & not end up like Ben Cohen.” Within hours, Cohen was flooded with support. He responded by saying, “Thank you all for your lovely comments and support. Very unexpected and I [am] really overwhelmed by it all. Ben.”

NBC‘s next annual live musical will be The Wiz. While the network is searching the country for an unknown, a very well-known woman is trying to push her way in. Brandy – who is currently appearing on Broadway as Roxie in Chicago – has let it be known that she not only wants to star in The Wiz, she believes it’s her destiny. Since nobody will let her audition, she took matters into her own hands and belted out “Home” while riding the NYC subway. She was sad to note, “Nobody on the train responded”. Lucky for them she wasn’t driving!

Just to keep you abreast of things happening in Provincetown, the Crown & Anchor has oodles of great performers on the horizon – including Linda Lavin, Shirley Jones, Billy Porter, and Charles Busch. They’re even producing two shows with Kathy Griffin at Town Hall on August 23rd! Grab your tickets now at OnlyAtTheCrown.com.

I should also mention that perennial favorite Margaret Cho will be bringing The psyCHO Tour to Provincetown on August 13th. You can get tix at BrownPaperTickets.com/event/1635500.

Who knows who will be on The View when it returns in the fall. All three of the co-hosts hired this year have been let go – with the possible exception of Nicolle Wallace, who has been asked to return on a part-time basis (we hear she is not thrilled with this offer). So far, Whoopi, Raven-Symoné, and Michelle Collins have contracts. There is a fourth position to be filled by a conservative who would be more conservative and combative (as opposed to the very moderate Wallace). As for the fifth seat, those geniuses at ABC News want that to be filled by a group of rotating hosts, including Molly Simms, Paula Faris, and Stacy London. As I’ve previously reported, former co-hosts Joy Behar and Sherri Shepherd were asked to join the rotating group. While talks with Behar have broken down, Sherri is still very much in the mix. We also hear that Rosie O’Donnell was asked to return for a few dates in the fall.

Someone rumored to fill the conservative slot on The View is Candace Cameron Bure – the sister of crazy Kirk Cameron (who, it must be said, still looks good). The network brass were impressed by a fight Raven and Candace had last week about the owners of that bakery in Oregon who the court ruled must pay $135K for refusing to bake a cake for a gay wedding (it’s against Oregon law to discriminate against customers based on sexual orientation). Candace sided with the bakers and saw it as a First Amendment issue (citing “freedom of association”), while Raven felt it was discrimination. The ladies all agreed that $135K was a bit steep – but that’s because they didn’t consider all the facts. The high settlement reflected not only the bakery’s illegal refusal, but also the owners going public with the gay couple’s identity, which led to harassment and death threats. It should also be noted that the bakers had their share of harassment, including having their car broken into. They ultimately closed up shop.

But they had something cooking on the back burner. Taking a page from the people who set up a GoFundMe account to raise money to pay the bills of that anti-gay pizza parlor, the bakery owners opened a similar page themselves to raise money to pay the lawsuit. They raised over $105K in eight hours and then, suddenly, the page was terminated. Why? GoFundMe stated that since the bakery owners “have been formally charged by local authorities and found to be in violation of Oregon state law concerning discriminatory acts….the campaign has been cancelled.” So the bakery moved to another crowdfunding site – Continue To Give. Thus far, they have raised over $350K, breaking all records for the site. By the by, they also got the GoFundMe money – $60K after taxes. That does it – I’m going to have to start banning people from joining BillyMasters.com.  That’ll be the day – when have I ever refused to service somebody?!

If a story is published online and then pulled, did it actually happen? Since nothing is ever really gone on the Internet, the answer is yes. Last week, Gawker posted a story about a high-ranking member of the media who hired a male escort. An avalanche of outrage came from people who think that outing someone who is not a public figure is mean-spirited and malicious. After a few hours, the story disappeared and the founder and managing editor of Gawker apologized: “The media environment has changed, our readers have changed, and I have changed. Not only is criticism of yesterday’s piece from readers intense, but much of what they’ve said has resonated.”

One of the main complaints was that the report identified the guy paying for the hooker, but protected the identity of the hooker himself! So let me rectify the situation. The media guy in question is allegedly the very dashing David Geithner, who is not only CFO of Condé Nast, but also the brother of former Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner. David allegedly hired hooker Brodie Sinclair (aka Leif Derek Truitt) to have sex for 2-3 hours at a negotiated rate of $2,500. So far, I have no problem with this story – except that Geithner is married to a woman and has kids (which also isn’t my problem). Brodie/Leif didn’t know David’s last name or anything about him. The deal was that Geithner would send Brodie/Leif half the money in cash via FedEx, and that’s how his identity was discovered. Brodie/Leif e-mailed Geithner some documents about a discrimination lawsuit he filed against his former landlord, who he claimed evicted him because he’s a porn star. The landlord says the eviction was because the tenant had an “emotional assistance dog” since he’s a veteran with PTSD. I couldn’t make this stuff up!

Geithner wasn’t sure why he was sent this information. Brodie/Leif revealed that he knew Geithner’s identity and hoped he could use his connections to help. Suddenly Geithner’s flight was delayed and then cancelled. He apologized, paid for Brodie/Leif’s hotel room, and promised to send him the balance of the negotiated rate. Well, hell hath no fury like a hooker scorned. Brodie/Leif contacted Gawker, shared his story, and sent them copies of the texts and e-mails. Gawker, doing due diligence, contacted Geithner to corroborate. He then texted Brodie/Leif saying, “Can you call as soon as possible? I spoke with a reporter who says you sent him something?”

Of course, this could all be a lie. The only one confirming this story is the hooker. Geithner denies that any of this is true: “I don’t know who this individual is. This is a shakedown. I have never had a text exchange with this individual. He clearly has an ulterior motive that has nothing to do with me.”

The boys of Well-Strung were never more adorable and playful.  With their new show Summer Lovin’, under the expert direction of Richard Jay-Alexander, they are most certainly on the right track (as they say in Pippin).  If you’ve never seen them, GO!  And if you’ve seen them before, GO again.  The majority of this show is brand new and you’ll have a blast.  You can get details and tickets about both acts at PtownArtHouse.com

The Well-Strung hunks are known for mixing pop songs with classical pieces, or playing pop songs in a classical style.  They brought their unique skills to Foundations of Wayne‘s “Stacy’s Mom”, retitled “Chelsea’s Mom”.  Then they made a pro-Hillary campaign video for the song.  Within days, the video went viral and reached Chelsea, who reTweeted it to her mom.  That would be cool enough, but then Hillary actually saw the video and reTweeted it herself.  Cool, right?  It gets better.  Hill had a fundraiser in Ptown on July 2nd, so the boys cancelled their show.  Why?  Because they were asked to perform at the fundraiser and meet Chelsea’s Mom in person!  Now that, my darlings, is cool!!!  You can check out the video and pics of the boys with our next president on BillyMasters.com.

The big gay news last week was the extortion trial of Teofil Brank.  You remember Teofil, aka gay porn star Jarec Wentworth.  He’s the guy who was blackmailing MagicJack founder Donald Burns.  Teofil/Jarec was found guilty on all six counts after a rather short two-hour deliberation, and will be sentenced in September.  But far more interesting to me was Burns’ testimony about his extensive history of hiring porn stars.  No judgment there – I’m sure many of us would do the same thing.  But Don claims to have hired guys every few weeks for solo or group sessions, paid them hundreds/thousands of dollars, and then sent them away – often by plane.  These included Sean Cody stars Willis, Arthur, Miles/Aidan, among others.

Then there’s Taylor/Justin Matthews/Justin Griggs.  During his testimony, he was questioned about having some “dental work” paid for by Burns.  Taylor/Justin said, “That wasn’t from Don….that was from another friend of mine.”  In an earlier interview, the FBI revealed that Taylor/Justin was hesitant about sharing “details about an individual because he was very powerful and you fear for the safety if you disclose information”.  On the stand, Taylor/Justin revealed that the other “friend” was David Geffen.  And we know how fond he is of “dental work”.

Some people can ignore misbehaving audience members.  But some people ain’t Patti LuPone.  I’ve warned you – don’t fuck with Patti.  I know you want to capture her brilliant performances, but unless you can do it surreptitiously, don’t risk it – that woman has eyes like a hawk.  She’s currently appearing off-Broadway in Shows for Days (a performance the London Guardian calls “never less than watchable”).  It seems a woman was using her phone during the show – happily not taking photos or videos, but likely texting.  Patti spotted the glare and she glared back.  Because timing is everything, LuPone waited until the perfect moment – an exit line – to snatch the phone away as she walked off-stage.  No word if the woman was brave enough to ask for her phone back.  Patti re-enacted the moment (which she called a “slight of hand”) the next evening in a pre-show speech which was posted online by the theatre.  PHEW – an officially sanctioned video!!  Check it out on BillyMasters.com.

Save your congratulations – yes, once again I accurately predicted what would happen at that train wreck they call The View.  Rosie Perez is officially out.  Because her schedule this winter required her to miss a number of shows, the powers that be felt it better to let her finish out her contract and then leave.  While she will stay until the season ends on August 2nd, she said, “Well, you guys all heard it.  I’ve decided that it’s time to move on,” which is a lovely way of saying, “You all know I was let go.  But I can say whatever I want, so this is what I’ve come up with”.  Like so many before her, I’m sure she’s welcomed back any time.

While it hasn’t been formally announced, big, strapping Michelle Collins has joined The View for next year.  She’ll be sitting alongside Whoopi and Raven-Symoné.  What about quasi conservative, Nicolle Wallace?  ABC is on the fence about her – they need a conservative, but they aren’t sure she’s conservative enough.  Stay tuned.

The only good thing to come out of this awkward transitional season is that Donald Trump hasn’t been on as a guest.  “I like to go to shows where they treat me well.  I’d like to do The View again but not with the current hosts because they don’t treat me well.”  He later Tweeted, “Whoopi Goldberg had better surround herself with better hosts than Nicole Wallace, who doesn’t have a clue.  The show is close to death!”  Whoopi responded by saying, “I assume by your Tweet you won’t be gracing us here at The View but remember, it’s a long way to election 2016.”

Alas, I can’t be everywhere.  If I could, I would certainly not have missed last week’s screening of Showgirls at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery – especially since it was attended by Nomi herself, Elizabeth Berkley.  Although Showgirls has become a gay cult classic, it is also considered one of the worst movies ever made and is regarded as putting the nail in Elizabeth Berkley’s burgeoning film career – it’s her Mommie Dearest.  We’re told this was Berkley’s first appearance at a screening in 20 years and she was greeted as a goddess (take a hint, Faye).  As luck would have it, the screening took place the day after the Supreme Court ruled in favor of gay marriage.  So it was a celebratory mood all around, with Berkley saying, “I wanna just start this incredible night off by just acknowledging what a celebration tonight is on the heels of such a monumental, incredible win last night.  Love wins!”  She then struck a Nomi pose, and the audience erupted – as you’ll see in the video on BillyMasters.com.

I must mention the prank that was pulled on poor Paris Hilton last week in Egypt.  I know this made all the news, but it’s just too delicious.  Paris was in Egypt and thought she was on a TV show that would fly her in a little airplane.  Shortly after take-off, the plane starts to nose-dive.  Paris kept yelling, “What the fuck is happening?”  Of course, this was all scripted, but Hilton was in the dark…or was she?  Rumor has it that the heiress was in on the prank and paid “in the millions”.  You can decide for yourself when you see the footage on our website.

Then there’s Michael Sam and Vito Whatshisname – the one who was previously dating a porn star (not that there’s anything wrong with that – I married one).  Perhaps more details will be revealed by the time this is published, but on the day I’m writing this (and in between orgasms), it seems that the couple has split up.  That would explain why Sam had to fly home to Texas for a “personal matter”.  As you may recall, the couple famously posted photos of Mikey proposing to Vito on the roof of Saint Peter’s Basilica in January – an event I’m sure was not sanctioned by the Vatican.  In the past week, photos of that special moment have been scrubbed from both of their social media accounts, and people close to the couple say they have been estranged for weeks.  For their part, Michael and Vito have thus far issued a terse “no comment” to press requests about their status.

I’ve been waiting for a gay angle in this whole Donald Trump mess, and finally it’s arrived.  Thomas Roberts and Cheryl Burke were slated to host the Miss USA Pageant, but given the brouhaha, they have both pulled out.  Last week, Roselyn Sanchez and Cristian de la Fuente pulled out from hosting the Univision telecast.  Then judges Flo Rida, Emmitt Smith, and Jonathan Scott pulled out.  Performers Craig Wayne Boyd and Natalie La Rose pulled out.  The only one who never pulled out was Donald – that’s why we’ve been plagued with his untalented children!  It’s all moot at this point – Univision dumped the pageant last week.  Now NBC announced they’re cutting all ties with Trump – including no longer airing Miss USA or Miss Universe.  The network stressed that if Celebrity Apprentice returns, it would have a new host.  Needless to say, The Donald is considering filing suit against the network: “NBC is weak, and like everybody else is trying to be politically correct.”  He’s already filed a $500 million lawsuit against Univision.  The pageant will now air on that thriving network, Reelz, which I believe is somewhere in the thousands on your cable provider.

Katy Perry sure has balls – she’s risking pissing off a gaggle of nuns!  It all started when she innocently bought what she thought was a former convent.  Turns out, some nuns still live there.  LA Archbishop Jose Gomez signed a deal for Perry to pay $14.5 million for the Convent of the Sisters of the Immaculate Heart of Mary.  However, the sister had signed papers to sell the property to a restaurateur for $15.5 million.  Wait a minute?  Can nuns do that?  Sell a convent?  Next thing you know, Pope Francis will list the Basilica on eBay!  Apparently, 47 of the resident nuns were moved out of the convent back in 2011.  But there are still five nuns there as squatters – and we all know how that goes in California (see the film Pacific Heights).  The irony is that prior to her pop success, Perry was a Christian singer.  She tried to appeal to the stubborn sisters directly by meeting with them, showing them her Jesus tattoo, and singing “Oh Happy Day”. Sister Rita Callanan told the Today show, “Our days have not been happy since then, I can assure you.”  I love a snappy sister!

Our Ask Billy question comes from Jasper in New York City: “Who is Adam Rodriguez?  You mentioned that he was on the Magic Mike float at LA Pride, but I have no idea who he is.  Was he in the first movie?  Is he hot?  Can you share anything about him?”

As it happens, Adam Rodriguez is a neighbor of yours – he was born in Yonkers.  He’s of Puerto Rican and Cuban ancestry, which means two things: a) he’s really hot and 2) he won’t be voting for Donald Trump.  You probably know him as Eric Delko on CSI: Miami.  And, yes, he played Tito in the first Magic Mike flick.  Showing off his considerable assets, he stripped down for the Cosmo UK issue supporting cancer research.  In promoting his pictorial, the magazine claimed, “EVEN MORE Adam Rodriguez than you’ll see in Magic Mike XXL“.  Rodriguez explained why he posed for the magazine: “Health problems don’t discriminate on age – young men and women need to pay attention to that.  It’s your body don’t be afraid of it.  Check yourself out, if something doesn’t feel right go an get a doctor’s opinion.”  You can check Adam out on BillyMasters.com.

Since I was in Florida, I was not able to be with my pals Belinda Carlisle and Susanna Hoffs when they did their first joint concert.  Susanna Hoffs & Friends is a semi-regular event at Largo at the Coronet in West Hollywood and at this show, her friend was The Go-Go’s lead singer.  The pair duetted on a number of Go-Go’s, Bangles, and Belinda songs.  We have some photos and videos you can see on BillyMasters.com.

By the time you read this, Michael Sam should be back up in Canada singing “Alouette, gentille alouette!”  About a week ago, Sam’s football career all but flatlined as he abruptly left training camp with the Montreal Alouettes for “personal reasons”.  He was suspended and local reporters mused that he wouldn’t be returning.  The team’s general manager was perplexed.  “He wanted to go home, and that’s what he did.  I don’t know why.  When a guy wants to go home, they go home.  He had some personal things to take care of.  I wouldn’t be surprised if he returns.  I’m surprised he left.  I was very surprised.  If he doesn’t come back, I would think football’s over for him.”  Rumors circulated that he wasn’t doing well in practice and had trouble with his teammates.  While we still don’t know anything about his mysterious departure, Sam was expected to return to practice on Monday.

Last weekend, London also celebrated gay pride.  While NYC got thespians Derek Jacobi and Sir Ian McKellen as their grand marshals (whilst promoting their show, Vicious), the London Gay Pride Parade included ISIS – at least, according to CNN.  The international broadcast of the news network interrupted programming to feature a report from Lucy Pawle, who said she saw the ISIS flag being brandished amidst the revelers.  While showing her exclusive video footage, she expressed shock that nobody else seemed to notice the flag, and patted herself on the back for having a scoop.  She probably should have reached a bit lower – to her backside.  The flag she showed did not have Arabic lettering – it actually featured drawings of assorted butt plugs and dildos!  I betcha Anderson Cooper or Don Lemon would never have made such a mistake.

I think God may be gay.  For many years, I’ve been involved in various Gay Pride festivals around the country where rain was predicted.  And then, as if a sign from the Lord above, the rains would stop just in time for the festivities.  For weeks, we’ve been waiting for the Supreme Court of the United States to rule on the legality of same-sex marriage.  And when did it come down?  Friday, June 26th – two days before the anniversary of the Stonewall Riots and on the eve of Gay Pride in San Francisco and New York City.  Timing is everything.

The not completely surprising ruling by SCOTUS led to lots of celebrating – including the White House being bathed in rainbow-colored lights.  Congratulatory Tweets came in from some of our queer Broadway icons, like Patti LuPone, Chita Rivera, Bernadette Peters, and even Liza Minnelli, who herself has been in two gay marriages.

Of course, it can’t all be good news.  While same-sex marriage was legalized around the country, two states have held out.  As of this writing, Louisiana and Mississippi have refused to issue marriage licenses to gay couples.  The Louisiana attorney general said that nothing in the Supreme Court ruling made the order “effective immediately”.  Mississippi’s attorney general echoed those sentiments – and then had his slave bring him another mint julep.

Last week, Sir Elton John used some colorful language at the Kingsholm Stadium in Gloucester, England.  During his concert, the stewards (which is what they call ushers in England) were running up and down the aisles enforcing a rule that forbids people from waving their hands in the air.  “You fucking stewards, who do you think you are?”  Then Elton pointed out one poor female usher: “This is my fucking concert, who are you?  Especially you with the fucking blonde ponytail, you are a fucking cunt.”  Initially, the audience was completely on Elton’s side.  But as luck would have it, the camera operator then showed the girl burst into tears and run up the aisle.  That’s when Elton realized that perhaps he may have catapulted over the line.  He then called the girl down to the stage, apologized to her, and let her share his piano bench.  “No one should ever talk to a lady like that,” Elton proclaimed.  We’ll show you all the dramatic footage on BillyMasters.com.

At the Women in Film’s Crystal + Lucy Awards (which, shockingly, are not telecast), Nicole Kidman revealed that she has some regrets.  At the top of her list is a Jane Campion film she turned down because it required her to wear a shower cap and kiss a girl.  I’m not really sure which one of those things turned her off more, but have you ever seen Kidman in a shower cap?  It’s not a pretty sight.  Anyhoo, her message was that women should be more fearless.  And with that, Nicole pulled a shower cap out of her purse and said she was ready to “kiss any woman in the room”.  Naomi Watts (who was presenting her with the award) took her up on that offer.  In a related story, Tom Cruise also wishes that he kissed more girls – and is willing to wear a shower cap if necessary.

Months after telling Paper Magazine that her sexuality is “fluid”, Miley Cyrus is going public with her latest relationship.  Friends say that she’s dating Stella Maxwell, a Victoria’s Secret model.  The only good news I see in this story is that Patrick Schwarzenegger is single.  Although, from what we’ve heard, he’s already got his eye on someone – someone 180-degrees opposite of Miley.  That’s all we’re saying…for now.

If you’ve learned nothing else from the two decades I’ve been writing this column, it’s that the better looking you are, the more advantages you have.  Admittedly, good-looking people also have issues, but that’s their problem.  This is not news to us, because we gays are a good-looking bunch.  For years, society has objectified women far ore than men.  But that certainly is changing and some actors don’t have a problem with it.  Chris Pratt was recently asked if he minds people being interested in him solely for his looks.  “I think if we really want to advocate for equality, it’s important to even things out….Not objectify women less, but objectify men just as often as we objectify women.  There are a lot of women who got careers out of it, and I’m using it to my advantage.”

Our Ask Billy question comes from Karl in Chicago: “I read that LeBron flashed his penis on live TV.  What happened?  Do you have the footage?”

During Game 4 between the Cleveland Cavaliers and the Golden State Warriors, ABC’s cameras happened to be in the right place at the right time.  While LeBron James and his teammates were in a huddle, he pulled down the front of his shorts to “adjust” himself.  You can check it out at BillyMasters.com.

You would think the Tony Awards would be the big theatre news from last week.  But the awards were trumped on Monday by the one-night-only benefit performance of Bombshell – the musical at the heart of the series Smash.  Most of the cast were on hand to reprise their roles – including the dueling Marilyn Monroes of Megan Hilty and Katherine McPhee, in addition to Christian Borle, Will Chase, Debra Messing, Brian d’Arcy James and Jeremy Jordan.  The show sold out in less than an hour and raised over $800K for the Actors Fund.  The entire evening was rapturously received (you can see some videos on BillyMasters.com).  So, where does it go from here?  The producers point out that while they have a great score, the book was never fully written.  Still, it could have legs.  Composer Marc Shaiman said, “I would love to do this at the Hollywood Bowl…Marilyn comes home.”

Nick Jonas continues to put himself out there for his gay fans.  The sexy singer heard that Iggy Azalea had pulled out of headlining Pittsburgh Pride this past weekend.  He called up the organization and offered to fill in.  “When I heard about the difficult position Pittsburgh Pride was in just days before their event, I knew I had to find a way to help.  I’m excited to do what I can to support the LGBT community in Pittsburgh.”  He just got hotter to me.

We hear that Caitlyn Jenner has been approached about being a judge for the Miss USA Pageant, which takes place on July 12th.  Note that this is not Miss America; Miss USA is the one owned by Donald Trump where, I believe, you can’t compete unless you’ve had a minimum of three plastic surgery procedures and at least two things implanted (and I think we all know what those two things should be).  It should also be mentioned that Miss USA allows transgender contestants.  It’s really quite a good fit – especially since Jenner watched that very pageant when trying to come up with a female name.

It’s been reported that Jenner’s net worth has gone up exponentially since going public as Caitlyn.  The going rate for a Caitlyn appearance is over $100K – whereas Bruce only got about $20K.  That said, Jenner waived any fee this past week for the two hours spent at the Los Angeles LGBT Center touring the facility and speaking with transgender youth – although I hasten to add that this visit was filmed for her reality show.  In addition to the show and personal appearances, Jenner has also been asked to appear on the second season of the Amazon hit, Transparent.  Creator Jill Soloway explained they aren’t sure exactly how to work Caitlyn into the show.  “I don’t know if she’d want to act, but we definitely want to incorporate the fact that she came out into this season.”

Our Ask Billy question comes from Gareth in London: “Did you hear about footballer [soccer player to us Yanks] Aaron Moody?  Pics of his naughty bits are making the rounds.  Thoughts?  Could that thing be real?”

Aaron Moody is a 19-year-old goalkeeper from Swindon Town Academy and he’s been identified as someone who posts nude photos online under the clever moniker “bigwhitecock20”.  Well, that ticks all our boxes.  I believe the photos are undoctored, which leads me to make an observation you’ll rarely hear me utter – I think he’s actually TOO big!  Although the pics have been deleted from most websites, you can see them on BillyMasters.com.

With her current stint in Broadway’s Chicago being hailed a hit, Brandy is looking forward.  “There is a dream to be Dorothy in The Wiz, and let me tell you, I will give that everything I have.  That role – I just feel like it’s meant for me to do it, and I don’t say that in an arrogant way.  I say it in a humble way.  I just want to feel what it’s like to be Dorothy.  I need to feel that.  I need to feel what that’s like.  I worked with Diana Ross [who played Dorothy in the 1978 film version of The Wiz] when I was 15.  She played my mother in a movie [Double Platinum], and Whitney Houston was my fairy godmother [in Cinderella], and she sang “Home” as one of her first songs to be recognized.  I’ve been close to these women – Diana Ross and Whitney Houston.  Diana Ross was Dorothy, and Whitney Houston sang a song Dorothy sang in The Wiz, and I just feel like I’m next in line for that, and that’s what I want to do.”  Not a very convincing argument.  I’ve met Diana Ross and Mary Wilson, so I suppose I’m next in line to be one of The Supremes.  That’ll happen when Brandy appears in The Wiz.

Ricky Martin is a single dad.  And he’s a single dad with a strong sex drive.  So he’s working hard to keep things balanced.  “I meet people.  I’m fine.  I meet very handsome men.  I like to have a conversation, looking into someone’s eyes and finding out their sense of humor.  I’m not saying you have to be an Adonis, but you have to connect….We’re all men.  It’s in our DNA to go for it.  But I have two boys and I cannot bring different men every day into my house.”  But he would if he could…