I take back everything I’ve said about Jussie Smollett – he’s a GENIUS!  When it was alleged that the Empire star had orchestrated being jumped on a deserted Chicago street in the wee hours of the morning while carrying a salad from Subway, I called him many things.  I believe the words “moron”, “idiot”, and “psychopath” were used, but I’ll need to review the transcript.  When he refused the City of Chicago’s generous offer to drop the matter if he repaid the cost of the investigation, I was baffled.  But, as all good chess players know, Jussie Smollett was thinking several steps ahead.  So when he was sentenced to 150 days in prison, it hit me.  Now he’ll have 150 days of non-stop working out, to say nothing of being banged like a human piñata.  And if you consider how much he’s saving on paying Nigerian brothers for the same thing…well, guess who’s coming out ahead?  And giving lots of it.  On the flip side (which I’m sure will not be neglected), Smollett still has to pay the City of Chicago over $130K for the investigation – plus an additional $25K for legal fees.  So maybe he’s not THAT smart.

Many celebs have expressed outrage over Smollett’s sentence.  Even Taraji P. Henson compared him to Emmett Till – a comparison which doesn’t really hold up, unless Till paid that woman to testify against him!

Much as it pains me, let’s talk about Disney.  The Mouse House has been chastised for not speaking out against the “Don’t Say Gay” bill in Florida – especially since it’s one of the largest employers in Florida (to say nothing of their large percentage of LGBTQ+ personnel, many of whom I know intimately).  Of course, it’s not like Disney can fold up their tents and move to a neighboring state – they aren’t carnie folk.  And, yeah, like Alabama or Georgia are better!  Disney CEO Bob Chapek sent out an internal memo called “Our Unwavering Commitment to the LGBTQ+ Community”.  In it, he stated that the company stands with LGBTQ+ employees and their families, but that corporate statements do little to effect change and can also be counterproductive. 

Alas, this only made the situation worse.  Detractors noted many instances of where Disney did act swiftly – including pulling all releases from Russia eight days after the Ukraine invasion (more recently, Disney has “paused” all Russian business).  And Pixar employees took umbrage with it, stating that “nearly every moment of overtly gay affection is cut at Disney’s behest, regardless of when there is protest from both the creative teams and executive leadership.”  It was a mess.  After several days, Chapek sent out a second memo.  “You needed me to be a stronger ally in the fight for equal rights and I let you down.  I am sorry”.  Since Disney had donated to many of the bill’s supporters as well as opponents, Chapek “paused” all political donations in Florida until they are thoroughly reviewed.  Well, it’s a start…I guess.

Our Ask Billy question comes from Roger in San Francisco:  “What do you know about the leaked nude photos of Daniel Newman?  If anyone can track them down, it’s you.”

It’s amazing to me the amount of chatter a glorified extra on The Walking Dead can cause.  Blame it on the Internet (or, if you’re a bit older, the bossa nova).  If Daniel Newman worked as much as he Tweeted – well, people other than my fans would know who he is!  Instead, he’s logged more minutes on social media than on any actual network.  With the same handful of racy photos (usually covered by his hand), Newman has deluged his fans with promises of skin shots if they pay for his OnlyFans page – which has the same handful of shots.  He recently posted the following: “Ummmm..about that Nude photo of me that got leaked across the internet yesterday (with no one warning me) can all of you please DM it back to me so I can destroy the copies?  LOL wow… Well now I guess you know WAY more about me than even my parents omg LMAO**”.  Let me explain what he’s doing.  This is a not-so-clever way to get more followers and e-mail addresses.  There are two nudes – from the front and the back – which have questionable veracity.  The rest are just teases.  And they can all be found on BillyMasters.com.

When someone other than me is teasing, it’s definitely time to end yet another column.  You know where I don’t tease?  On www.BillyMasters.com – the site that is a sure thing.  This week, I head back to blustery Boston.  So if you’d like to warm me up, drop a note to Billy@BillyMasters.com, and I promise to get back to you before Bradley Cooper writes a book – Eat Your Way to Smoother Skin!  So, until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

You’ve probably already heard this story, but I’m gonna still report it because it makes me giggle.  Rosie O’Donnell was having dinner with her son, her son’s girlfriend, and Fran Drescher.  I’ll let her explain what happened next (and I’m reporting this verbatim): “Seated next to us…was Nick Jonas and his wife, someone Chopra.  Which I always assumed was Deepak Chopra’s daughter, so when I said ‘hi Nick Jonas, you were great in Kingdom, and hi I know your dad’, and she goes ‘you do?  Who’s my dad?’  I said Deepak, and she said ‘no and Chopra is a common name.’”  When she reported the story, O’Donnell said, “I felt so embarrassed, didn’t you think Nick Jonas was married to Deepak Chopra’s daughter, am I the only one who thought that?”  No, you’re not the only one.  And, yes, I recognize that makes me a bad person.  Rosie added, “To Nick Jonas I apologize, and to the Chopra wife, I apologize too.”  All of my close friends will tell you that was SUCH a Billy Masters apology!!

If it’s true that there’s no such thing as bad publicity, then Todrick Hall had a fabulous week!  The fallout from his Big Brother debacle continues.  He’s doing a delicate balance of blocking all comments on social media while also trying to sell tickets for a national tour.  Many old stories about his previous bad behavior have cropped up – non-payment of collaborators, mistreatment of employees, etc.  The most heinous story – and one I never heard before – dates back to 2017.  Tod was working with adult film star Tommy Italiano on the Zen Blonde podcast.  Apparently this Italiano guy was also Todrick’s assistant.  They had a tiff, and Todrick allegedly said the following: “If you say anything about me, I’m going to go on my YouTube channel and I’m going to say that you have HIV and that you have unprotected sex with people and you don’t tell them and I’m going to destroy your reputation.  I’m going to destroy your career, and this will be the last time you ever work again.”  Talk about #MeToo!  To his credit, Todrick never made good on that threat.  But, according to Tommy, Todrick called Italiano’s mother and revealed her son was HIV-positive.  And people think Ellen’s mean!

You read it here first – Jennifer Hudson is getting her own talker.  During one of DeGeneres’ many hiatuses (hiatai??), the powers that be at The Ellen DeGeneres Show used the downtime to film some test shows with Hudson on Ellen’s stage and with all her staff.  The results were impressive enough for Fox to pick up the show starting in the fall.

When is a punishment not a punishment?  When it backfires.  Remember when ABC suspended Whoopi Goldberg for two weeks over that Holocaust comment?  Am I the only one who noticed that she came back early?  She was gone on a Wednesday and only missed six shows (she doesn’t do Fridays).  Why?  A curious thing happened – the shows sans Whoopi saw a loss of over 300K viewers!  When she returned, it’s been reported that The View saw “the biggest week-to-week gain for the entire show’s history”.  So, what was the net effect of Whoopi’s suspension?  Proving to ABC that she’s even more valuable than they thought.  Go ahead – suspend her again.  I dare you!

Let’s talk about the big news of the week – Bradley Cooper’s face.  It was almost enough to make his old “mentor”, James Lipton weep…if he weren’t dead.  Cooper walked the red carpet at the SAG Awards last week and it caused Ukraine-level chatter.  Here’s what one reporter said: “Showing almost no wrinkles on his beautiful baby-smooth mug, the 47-year-old left everyone wondering what – if anything – has he done to his face?”  Lots of things go into looking good.  I have a friend who sees someone who’s had a good night’s sleep and is well-lit and proclaims they’ve had reconstructive surgery.  Admittedly, Bradley appeared remarkably refreshed (but not anywhere near wrinkle-free – look around the eyes).  But you know what nobody mentioned?  How much wider his face was.  Comparing now-and-then photos are staggering.  And you know what fills in wrinkles best?  Extra weight.  Yes, you heard me – fat is God’s natural filler!  One plastic surgeon said it in a nicer way: “His muscles seem to be a lot more relaxed”.  Oh, my muscles are more relaxed than Sunny von Bulow’s!

One must mention SAG’s new president, the fantastic Fran Drescher.  Talk about someone who looked incredible!  You might think she’s made a pact with the devil, but Franny chalks it up to hard work…and a cadre of professionals.  Drescher dropped a video of a veritable SWAT team making her camera-ready.  And it only took three hours!  If I had professionals working on me that long…well, I’d look like Bradley Cooper.  Only thinner!

Our Ask Billy question comes from Karl in Chicago:  “I’ve been watching Pam and Tommy, but when will we see that episode with his talking penis?  It sounded weird when you wrote about it.  Maybe it got cut.”

Tommy is definitely cut, but that’s another story.  Pam and Tommy is a docuseries on Hulu.  Remember when we had “miniseries”?  Now we have “docuseries” – which I believe is a miniseries you have to pay to see.  While I have to give massive props – two massive props, actually – to Lily James as Pamela, let’s look a bit closer at Sebastian Stan as Tommy.  Karl obviously missed Episode 2, when Lily and Sebastian reenact much of the infamous sex tape.  At the 19-minute mark, they “reveal” themselves.  And two minutes later, Tommy’s penis starts talking in the bathroom.  The penis is very upset that Tommy wants to settle down with Pamela Anderson.  It wants to have some fun with such people as Jenny McCarthy and Denise Richards – apparently that penis isn’t a voting member of the Academy!  We know this isn’t Sebastian Stan’s penis, because we all saw that in the movie Monday.  But it’s still mighty impressive, and you can see it (and Stan’s real one) on BillyMasters.com.

I was happy that Todrick Hall had the opportunity to gain tons of new fans with his appearance on Celebrity Big Brother.  Alas, he blew it…pun intended.  Virtually every celebrity in the house hated him.  While most chalked his behavior up to strategy, Chris Kirkpatrick said Todrick crossed the line when he said Chris’ son would be ashamed of him.  Todrick sunk so low as to quote Shanna’s most terrifying moment (when an intruder tried to get into her car) when she was evicted.  He was completely shocked by the icy reception and eschewed all interviews after his second-place finish.  Perhaps Julie “You look beautiful” Chen Moonves said it best: “My heart hurt for him.  He was aware and he looked concerned…I pray he makes any and all amends to those he hurt and that people allow grace and forgiveness.”  Somehow, I doubt it.

It’s been a bad year for Wendy Williams.  First she got the coronavirus after telling Dr. Oz that she didn’t trust the vaccine.  Then her Graves’ disease flared up.  And then “something” kept her shuttered away.  But, this is a new Billy – looking at the bright side.  This gave my pal Sherri Shepherd an opportunity to do what she does best – jump into any situation and make it better.  Sherri’s natural light and ebullience brought joy to Wendy watchers.  But she couldn’t take over the show full-time – after all, she lives in California and has a contract with Dish Nation.  This meant there were other fill-in hosts.  Each and every one made Sherri look even better.  Therefore, I am pleased to announce that after The Wendy Williams Show shutters at the end of this season, it will be replaced by a new daytime talk show called Sherri.  Congrats!!!

No sooner had that announcement been made than Wendy fired her entire management team – including publicist Howard Bragman.  He had just issued a press release on Wendy’s behalf: “She, more than anyone, understands the reality of syndicated television – you can’t go to the marketplace and sell a show that’s The Maybe Wendy Show.  She understands why this decision was made from a business point of view, and she’s been assured by Debmar-Mercury that should her health get to a point where she can host again and should her desire be that she hosts again that she would be back on TV at that time.”  Shortly thereafter, Wendy posted this: “Mr. Bragman although I appreciate your concerns and respect you immensely I have not authorized you to make any statements on my behalf regarding my current status with Debmar-Mercury [producers of The Wendy Williams Show].  Again thanks for your continuing concern and support.”  Howard questions the veracity of that post.  So, what’s the positive side?  Maybe Wendy’s on the mend.  To be continued…

“I hope I shaved my nipples on those days because
I have the most embarrassing chest hair!”  
– Tom Holland discusses seeing his bare areolae in Uncharted on IMAX

When we can start with a couple of areolae and move south, it’s definitely time to end yet another column.  All that positivity has left me exhausted.  For some real dirt, check out www.BillyMasters.com – the site that tells (and shows) all.  If you have a question, send it along to Billy@BillyMasters.com, and I promise to get back to you before I get a job plucking Tom Holland’s nipples.  Until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

Our Ask Billy question comes from Gary in Houston: ”Did you see that footage of the hot guy jumping into the water to save a dog?  I heard there’s a video – can you track it down?”

The incident in question took place two weeks ago at the Kal’mius River in Donetsk, Ukraine – we’re nothing if not topical.  Two dogs were walking across the icy river.  The ice cracked, and one dog fell in and got entangled in some branches.  The other dog stood on the ice howling, which attracted some people.  Out of the crowd, a hunky Ukranian do-gooder stripped to his undies, waded into the water, and saved the petrified pup.  Of course, I will share the footage on BillyMasters.com.

When an icy Ukranian is getting me all hot and bothered, it’s definitely time to end yet another column.  While I try to cool off, why don’t you check out www.BillyMasters.com – the site that isn’t opposed to doing it doggie style.  If you have a question, send it off to Billy@BillyMasters.com, and I promise to get back to you before Gus shows off his Cockney.  So, until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

Could somebody do some testing on Channing Tatum?  He continues to boggle the mind.  One week, the paparazzi snap him jogging shirtless through the streets, appearing to be well into his second trimester.  A few weeks later, he’s sporting cut abs and chiseled cheekbones.  I assume he’s aided either by some photographic skullduggery or some “medicine” heretofore only available to Russian Olympians.  Either way, I’m in – whatever the price.  Tatum recently did a photoshoot for VMan magazine where he appears to have turned back time – and not in the Cher way.  Sure, he’s not completely naked.  For those photos, you’ve got to go to BillyMasters.com. 

He’s probably getting back into shape for Magic Mike’s Last Dance.  He’s described this latest installment as the “Super Bowl of stripping”.  As someone who hosted male strip shows for years, I can assure you that most of my boys wouldn’t cut it at Arthur Murray (which, I realize, is a reference only Joy Behar could appreciate).  And Tatum agrees.  “I want dancing like we’ve never been able to do in the other two movies, because we had to be honest to what the reality of that world is, which isn’t great dancing.”  Of course, rarely did my dancers look as good as Chan in his prime.  An exception would be a very young pre-porn Ryan Idol – who, by the by, has recently been released from prison.  But that’s another story for another time.

All of these boys owe a debt of gratitude to the hunky Harry Hamlin, who made headlines playing gay 40 years ago in Making Love.  I’m sure you’ve all seen the recent headlines – which claim that Harry all but lost his career by playing a gay character.  That isn’t actually what he said.  The part that’s gotten all the attention is this: “For years, I’d think was that the reason why I stopped getting calls?  And finally realized that was the last time I ever did a movie for a studio…Even though I was straight, I think the perception at the time was that anybody who could play gay must be gay.”  However, he goes on to say this: “Regardless of the effect it has on my film career, I went on to have a great career – and I still do.  I’m very proud of having done that movie.  Now a gay love story can be told freely.”  It’s interesting to note that he did Making Love shortly after fathering a child with Ursula Andress.  It doesn’t get more heterosexual than that!

I promised you it would happen, and now it has – Will and Sonny are returning to Days of Our Lives.  The couple last appeared on Days of Our Lives: Beyond Salem this past fall – with Chandler Massey as Sonny and Zach Tinker as the recast Will.  The same duo will turn up on daytime Days this week – alongside the lovely Greg Rikaart, who is apparently taking a hiatus from his work on Young and the Restless.

“You can guess which body part was a little bit frozen when I finished…
it was one of the worst competitions I’ve been in.”  
– Finland’s Remi Lindholm after completing the 50km cross-country skiing event at the Olympics. 
Perhaps his penis wouldn’t be so cold if he hadn’t finished 28^th!  Getting indoors didn’t help much. 
“When the body parts started to warm up after the finish, the pain was unbearable.”

So, the Olympics are over.  Ho-hum.  I didn’t watch a thing.  Sure, I enjoy seeing athletes in Lycra as much as the next gay man.  But I don’t want to spend another evening playing “Are those goose bumps or testicles?”  Meanwhile, Celebrity Big Brother is meandering to a lackluster close.  As of this writing, Todrick Hall still has a chance of winning.  Regardless of the outcome, he’s raised his visibility amongst average Americans…assuming anyone other than me was watching.

Remember when we first heard about Gus Kenworthy?  He had lots of endorsement deals and was featured in commercials as a proud US Olympian – resplendent with red, white and blue.  Now he’s limping to the end of his Olympic career…for England – still sporting red, white and blue.  Sure, he was born in England and is a credit to his sport.  But, I dunno – I find it all just a bit distasteful – not that I’ve tasted him…recently.  One reporter said that Gus “skied the way he wanted.”  Apparently, that included tumbling during the men’s halfpipe finals.  Shortly after that wipeout, he got through his final run on his feet – and then lifted his jacket to show off…no, not some skin…but a skintight gray T-shirt which read, “Openly British” on his left tittie (AKA the good one).  Oh, that Gus – such a scallywag.

Should anyone be keeping track, there were a record 36 openly gay Olympians in Beijing.  Six of those came from the US (not counting Gus) and eight from Canada.  The Canadians included the dashing Eric Radford, who is the first openly gay man to win gold at a Winter Olympics back in 2018.  One must also mention little Jason Brown, twirling his heart out for a personal best.  Timothy LeDuc is apparently the first non-binary Winter Olympian.  Lastly, I would think curling would attract more gays.  But sexy Bruce Mouat is the only gay in that sport – as captain of the British team.  I once had a nasty curling incident, but eventually you learn to unplug it.

Our Ask Billy question comes from Tom in Dallas: ”You mentioned Eric Dane eating ass in Euphoria.  But you haven’t mentioned the hottie sitting on the toilet when Cassie got out of the tub.  Was that real or another fake?”

According to Ansel Pierce (the actor on the can), it was real.  “Alright, so we’re sitting at about one day since Euphoria premiered…yes, that is me in the bathroom.  Not a prosthetic, got a lot of questions!”  So, he answered Tom’s question for us.  If you missed his 30 seconds of fame, we’ll show it on BillyMasters.com.

You’ve heard me often refer to the Filth2Go Twins, Gary and Larry Lane.  Ten years ago, the boys (who previously appeared on Fear Factor with Joe Rogan) released a documentary, Hollywood to Dollywood.  Aside from devotion to their beloved Dolly, they openly mused about the topics tackled in the film 9 to 5 – equality in the workplace, women’s rights, predatory behavior, to say nothing of imprisonment and attempted murder!  So, they had their next project.  Still Working 9 to 5 talks to all of the actors from the original, along with some other luminaries, about those very topics.  And, as a bonus, they somehow convinced Dolly to re-record the title song as a duet…with Kelly Clarkson!  The documentary will debut at the SXSW Film Festival in March.  Congrats!!!

It’s been a good week for FoB – Friends of Billy.  Just before I left LA, I got word that Sherri Shepherd entered into final negotiations to formally take over the show formerly known as The Wendy Williams Show.  There are details I’m not at liberty to discuss.  The producers had hoped Wendy would be able to return to her show at some point this season – a hope which seems to have flickered out.  While Sherri was always everyone’s first choice to take over, she’s under contract to Dish Nation through the end of this season – so just getting a week off here and there to fill in has been challenging.  Also, Sherri and her son Jeffrey live in LA, and Wendy films in NYC.  There are lots of details to work out…but I believe we’ll all know more very soon.

Alas, Wendy ain’t doing well on the personal front, either.  According to reports, her former financial advisor has told Wells Fargo Bank that Williams is “not of sound mind”.  As a result, Wendy has been restricted access to any of her money or financial records.  Shades of Britney.  Her attorney has filed an emergency petition to try to turn things around, but the bank is fighting back and wants a court to decide.  I hear the word “conservatorship” has been bandied about.  Stay tuned.

No sooner had I landed in Las Vegas when tragedy struck.  No Cinnabon!!  The airport location is temporarily closed.  Well, now we know why Adele cancelled!  I can’t speak for the songstress, but I had planned to carbo-load at Cinnabon for my entire fun-filled, four-day birthday weekend in Vegas.  Instead, I had to suffice with some hurriedly purchased Fig Newtons and dash off to see the girls of RuPaul’s Drag Race in their residency at the Flamingo.  Various alums have been part of this live show since it began in 2020.  The current cast features Derrick Barry, Kameron Michaels, Trinity K. Bonet, Jaida Essence Hall and the incredible Eureka O’Hara, with Asia O’Hara as host.  One mustn’t forget the Pit Crew which features five sexy men who are also fantastic dancers.  The production values in the Flamingo Showroom are ideally suited for this show – it’s all quite amazing.  In between the numbers, we were treated to some clever video clips featuring RuPaul herself.  Alas, some of the banter between numbers could have been better, and the show could be tighter.  But, these are minor quibbles.  If you are a Drag Race fan – and even if you’re not – it is a show not to be missed.  Grab tickets at Ticketmaster.com.

RuPaul shows no signs of slowing down when it comes to world domination.  Ru will be hosting a reboot of the game show Lingo for CBS.  I don’t remember Lingo, but I presume it’s some sort of a literal game – unless it’s short for “Cunni-Lingo”.  Turns out the show originally ran in 1987 and was hosted by Michael Reagan, son of President Ronald Reagan – so the bar is set pretty low.  Since the host is listed as “RuPaul Charles”, I presume he’ll be dressed as a boy.  By the by, Ru is also one of the executive producers.

As you know, Adele was unable to come up with a show for Caesars Palace that would justify the ticket price of hundreds (or, in some cases, thousands) of dollars.  Rather than just hoist herself on top of a piano and warble some ditties, she left her fans high and dry.  Around the same time, Legends in Concert re-opened at the Tropicana hosted by the legendary Frank Marino as Joan Rivers – and that’s always a cause for celebration.  As luck would have it, this incarnation of the revue stars a quartet of exceptional female singers – Tierney Allen as Lady Gaga, Janae Longo as Adele, Lisa McClowry as Cher and Elisa Furr as Celine Dion.  And they’re all fantastic!  As a gesture of goodwill, Legends in Concert is offering a limited number of free tickets to people who bought tix to the real Celine and Adele.  To take advantage of this offer, simply head on over to the Tropicana’s box office.

My last night in town was spent with a couple of legends who were also in concert – Marilyn McCoo and Billy Davis Jr.   They appeared at The Orleans Showroom, and it was a great way to not only celebrate my birthday, but also celebrate their Oscar nomination.  Marilyn and Billy are featured in Questlove’s Summer of Soul, which just got an Oscar nod for Best Documentary.  As to their show…what can I say?  They never disappoint.  In addition to all of the hits, they performed several numbers from their recent Lennon/McCartney collection entitled Blackbird.  It was a great concert and the capacity audience enjoyed every second of it.

Our Ask Billy question comes from Harry in Chicago: ”I’m sure you’ve seen the video of Taron Egerton dancing around in a towel.  What’s that all about?  He sure is hot.”

Whatever qualities of Taron’s are in question, his hotness speaks for itself.  For those who don’t know, Taron posted a video on Instagram where he’s dancing around in a towel to the Bee Gees’ “More Than a Woman” (insert your own joke).  With his moves, he might have been better served with “Hips Don’t Lie”…but, I digress.  Again…what was the point?  Nobody seems to know.  However, he’s been whispered about as a possible Wolverine in one of those Marvel films that seem to make so much money.  Until then, you can catch him on BillyMasters.com.

I saw the national tour of the musical Everybody’s Talking About Jamie at LA’s Ahmanson Theatre.  Let me first note that proof of both vaccines AND the booster were required for entry.  I’ve seen the documentary about the real-life Jamie, so I was well familiar with the story.  Obviously I understand that things change during the “creative process” of making a musical.  But some of the choices made certain characters completely unlikeable and unbelievable.  This caused the many twists and turns of the beleaguered plot to seem unfathomable.  The music is fine but unmemorable.  The performers appeared to be phoning it in – but I saw it on a Tuesday night.  I’m glad I went, but I cannot give it much of an endorsement beyond that.  If you can see it without spending too much effort (or money), then go.  In case you’re wondering, I’ve since seen the film version which was only slightly better.

The long-discussed film adaptation of the musical version of The Color Purple has picked up some traction.  As predicted, Fantasia Barrino will repeat her stage triumph of Celie (curiously, I’m told Cynthia Erivo – the Tony-winning Celie on Broadway – was not even considered).  Hot off her turn chewing scenery in NBC’s Annie Live!, Taraji P. Henson will take on the role of Shug Avery.  More details to come.

And Just Like That… finished its first season last week.  Lots of it made me cringe, some of it made me laugh, but most of it made me wonder what was the point.  People change – especially over a decade or two.  And certain relationships do not stand frozen in time.  But this show seemed to want it both ways – as do I, but that’s another story.  The show wants to keep one foot firmly planted in the past with the trio being joined at the hip as if nothing changed.  But they also want to suddenly branch out into new and important relationships.  This begs a further question…did these gals not meet anyone new since the last film?  I suppose the handling of Samantha would have been palpable if we didn’t know Kim Cattrall referred to her former co-stars as a cabal of mean girls who she never wanted to speak to again (I’m paraphrasing).  Having her there via text is very au courant and kinda worked.  But would she be so wishy-washy that she’d text with Carrie but not talk on the phone?  What next?  Did she stand Carrie up for drinks?   Did they meet and then fight all over again?  Will Stanford continue to manage TikTok dancers in Japan?  I’ll watch the show if it continues (which I suspect it will), but I really can’t say that I care.

“You all saw the news.  Whoopi will be back here in two weeks.”  
– Joy Behar addresses Whoopi Goldberg’s suspension from The View.  And that’s the way it is.

When Sharon Osbourne was pushed off The Talk for defending free speech, I said it was a slippery slope.  And here we are, with Whoopi Goldberg being suspended from The View.  If I belonged to the Barbara Walters School of Journalism – the graduation ceremony took place at Stonehenge – I’d feel compelled to regurgitate details of both instances.  Suffice it to say, Osbourne defended her friend Piers Morgan’s right to express an opinion about Meghan Markle – and suddenly was branded a racist.  Likewise, Whoopi expressed an opinion about the Holocaust which was not altogether wrong.  She said, “The Holocaust isn’t about race…it’s about man’s inhumanity to man.”  What a difference one word makes.  Had she said, “The Holocaust isn’t ONLY about race”, she would have been fine, because obviously the Nazis also targeted gay people and various religious groups.  One could easily consider the Holocaust under the umbrella of “man’s inhumanity to man”.  It’s like when people say “All lives matter”, instead of just “black lives” or “gay lives” or any one group’s lives matter.  They can all be true simultaneously.  Anyway, Whoopi apologized on the air, and led a lengthy discussion with Jonathan Greenblatt of the Anti-Defamation League.  Shortly after that show, ABC announced she was being put on a 2-week unpaid suspension.

It’s worth noting that in 25 years of vitriol, hate speech, split-screens, arguments, and walk-offs, this is the first time ABC has suspended a View co-host.  Things that make you go “Hmmm”.  I’m curious – when did intent become irrelevant?  Clearly Whoopi’s statement was not meant to offend anyone.  Her friend and frequent collaborator Bruce Vilanch points out that not only has he never found Goldberg to have even a speck of anti-Semitism, the stage name she chose is Jewish!  Bill Geddie, co-creator and former executive producer of The View said the following: “It scares me that we’ve come to this crossroads and now we as a culture need to get a handle on this insanity before it chokes us all.”  If the co-hosts are not free to have honest and open discussions, what’s the point of the show?  It’s called The View, after all!  I was curious if any of Whoopi’s co-hosts would speak up on her behalf?  Other than Ana Navarro, they were all predictably silent.  It begs the question – will Whoopi return?  Remember – Sharon was initially suspended, too.

Our Ask Billy question comes from John in New York City:  “Have you been watching Euphoria?  You must have seen Eric Dane rimming a guy.  Can you find out who the guy was?”

As I was watching, I was thinking, “That’s one lucky bitch!”  Then I thought, “I hope he douched!!”  The ass in question belonged to an actor named Christin Byrdsong – no relation to Cindy.  He called Eric, “A gem of a man.  So professional and chill.”  “Chill” is the last thing I want in my crack, but to each his own.  Byrdsong continues: “The actual filming was incredibly professional.  Totally fake.  A piece was built by the intimacy coach to go between his face & my butt.  When I was on the set I got into position they asked if I was comfortable.  I said ‘dreams really do come true’.  The set burst into laughter…I filmed on an incredible show with an incredible director and an actor I admire and I got paid.  That’s the dream.”  Check it out on BillyMasters.com.

MSNBC was in a pickle.  The network had to find someone to take over for Brian Williams, who departed in December.  One of the more surprising candidates was defrocked CNN personality, Chris Cuomo – who I would enjoy seeing defrocked.  MSNBC even met with Cuomo to discuss the possibilities.  However, there was a big hurdle to clear – and that hurdle is named Rachel Maddow.  I’m told that Maddow – who puts the “Ms.” in MSNBC – was less than eager to be associated with Cuomo on any level, and made her displeasure known.  If they were seriously considering Cuomo, that crushed his chances.  Williams’ slot will be filled by Stephanie Ruhle.  And so it goes…

In this column, and on Billy Masters LIVE (season three will start shortly), we’ve discussed the topic of trans athletes – specifically in which category should they compete.  My opinion – which has been debunked by virtually everyone I’ve spoken with – is that someone born female and was now a trans male would be at a musculoskeletal disadvantage when competing against cis males.  The real world is also proving me wrong.  At UPenn, a trans female swimmer – Lia Thomas – has been criticized for competing against other females.  In a recent swim meet, not only did Lia come in sixth, the winner was Iszac Henig – a trans male athlete.  The other four swimmers who beat Lia were cis female athletes.  Once again, the cheese stands alone.

This topic was tackled by Olympian Michael Phelps.  And Phelps is ideally qualified to speak on athletes, competition, swimming, and transgender people.  At least, that’s what Taylor Lianne Chandler thinks.  She’s an intersex woman who claims to be one of Michael Phelps’ exes.  When it came to the trans athlete situation, Phelps said, “I believe we should all feel comfortable with who we are in our own skin, but I think sports should all be played on an even playing field.”  Chandler took offense to the term “even playing field”, but not for the reason you’d think.  “He’s a hypocrite for saying it should be a level playing field.  He is genetically superior with his 6’7” wingspan, double-jointed ankles and huge feet.  His chemical composition allows him to breathe in and fill his lungs and hold his breath longer.”

And now, we turn to the big story of the week – the truth behind the dwarfs.  And by dwarfs, I mean the seven little men immortalized in Disney’s Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs – although the story dates back to the 1800s and the Brothers Grimm.  The controversy surrounds Disney’s proposed live-action remake.  Spearheading the controversy is the diminutive Peter Dinklage.  At first, I thought he was lobbying for a role.  Perhaps all seven – it’s amazing what they can do with CGI.  Who else are they gonna cast?  People on TLC shows?  But, no, Dinklage was actually chastising Disney for “still making that fucking backwards story about seven dwarfs living in a cave together.  What the fuck are you doing, man?  Have I done nothing to advance the cause from my soapbox?”  I hate to be a stickler, but in the Disney flick, the dwarfs live in a cottage – not a cave.  And, as to a “soapbox”, exactly how old is Dinklage?

Still, I couldn’t help but wonder – who were these dwarfs?  I always assumed they were brothers, and were working in the mine for some nefarious rich bitch.  So, I took a closer look at the song “Heigh-Ho”.  The first clue comes in the first verse: “We dig…in our mine the whole day through.”  Aha!  So it’s their mine!  And, as it turns out, digging is “what we like to do”.  And it’s profitable – “It ain’t no trick to get rich quick, if you dig dig dig with a shovel or a pick, in a mine!  In a mine!  Where a million diamonds shine.”  So, they’re dripping in diamonds.  But that’s not all.  “A thousand rubies, sometimes more, but we don’t know what we dig ‘em for.”  And you thought Dopey was the only stupid one!  So, let me get this straight – they’ve got their own mine full of diamonds and rubies, and Dinklage is worried they’re being victimized?  To make the situation more ridiculous, a spokesperson from Disney stated, “To avoid reinforcing stereotypes from the original animated film, we are taking a different approach with these seven characters and have been consulting with members of the dwarfism community.”  Oh, really?  The dwarfism community is weighing in?  I can’t wait to hear what they have to say.

Our Ask Billy question comes from Frank on Cape Cod:  “I know you’re watching And Just Like That.  Did you see when Charlotte was about to give Harry a blow job?  Who knew he had such a big cock!”

Oh, I saw it.  But, I have some bad news for you – the penis Evan Handler hauled out of his trousers was not his own.  Yes, I know this is terrible news for you, and I wish there were a way to…err, soften the blow.  But, there you have it – it was a prosthetic penis.  Still, all is not lost.  Did you watch the whole episode?  Because a few minutes later, Carrie’s downstairs neighbor’s boyfriend walked out into the hallway wearing only a towel – which conveniently dropped to show his penis.  His real penis!  The actor’s name is Corey Saucier, and while we don’t expect to see more of him on AJLT, you can see every inch of him on BillyMasters.com.

An interesting story emerged from the set of the Pam & Tommy movie.  As you know, the stunning Sebastian Stan is playing rocker Tommy Lee.  Surprisingly, his primary relationship is not with Pamela Anderson – it’s with his penis.  Having seen the real Tommy’s penis (which you can see on BillyMasters.com), I get it.  In the script, Tommy spends an inordinate amount of time talking to his dick.  Not only that, but the penis talks back – and if there’s one thing I hate, it’s a chatty cock!  Stan said, “By the end of the scene, I treated it like it was an intimate buddy conversation that one might have when they’re falling in love” – which really puts every relationship Sebastian has had into question.  The filmmakers have designed an animatronic penis – kinda like Disney’s Hall of Presidents…if Lincoln’s penis moved (and talked).  It requires four “puppeteers” to operate – much like my penis!

Shocking stories are emerging from a documentary about Playboy founder Hugh Hefner.  According to sources, Secrets of Playboy (which debuts on A&E this week) has some unexpected revelations.  Sure, there were orgies, drugs, abuse of power – we expected all of that.  But bestiality?  Well, color me surprised.  Linda Lovelace – she of Deep Throat fame – claims to have been “forced” to perform oral sex on a German Shepherd while Hefner and his friends watched.  Uh, just “watched”?  Hef’s ex-girlfriend, Sonda Theodore, says that wasn’t the only instance involving an animal.  “I walked in once, and he was [jerking off] our dog.  I said, ‘What are you doing?’  He said, ‘Dogs have needs.’  I said, ‘Stop that!’  I never let him be alone with our dog again.”

The Go-Go’s were scheduled to ring in the new year at The Venetian in Las Vegas.  Since I was with family in Boston for the holidays, I passed.  I wasn’t the only one.  Due to a Covid issue within their organization, The Go-Go’s rescheduled their tour dates…to mid-February.  As luck would have it, I was going to be in Vegas to celebrate my birthday (2/13), and had already planned to see pals Marilyn McCoo and Billy Davis Jr. at The Orleans (2/12).  Seeing The Go-Go’s on 2/11 seemed a no-brainer.  Tickets were secured, flights were booked, and just like that, The Go-Go’s cancelled again (McCoo and Davis are still a go).  I was surprised to see many loyal Go-Go’s fans express outrage on social media – with some even demanding that the band reimburse them for travel expenses.

Why am I telling this long story?  Not only to remind you to shop early for Billy’s birthday gift, but because Adele is going through a similar situation.  She, too, was scheduled to begin a Vegas residency.  And not just any residency – one that would pay her $500K PER NIGHT!  And then, poof, cancelled.  And not just cancelled – but cancelled with just 24 hours’ notice.  Needless to say, the fans are not happy.  Apparently, people were flying in from around the globe.  And some are demanding Adele reimburse them for hotels and plane tickets.  Been there, done that.  Why did she cancel?  “I’m so sorry, but my show ain’t ready,” she said in a video.

Finally, we have an Ask Billy question worthy of being the first of the year.  Hal in Chicago asks, “What do you know about British model, Russell White?  He’s so freakin’ hot.”

Agreed!  Russell is a 26-year-old sexy beast (not to be confused with Russell White, a 29-year-old Irish triathlete).  The model Russell has flaunted his flawless physique for a fair number of photographers who are interested in his body…of work.  He was just named “brand ambassador” for Ron Dorff, a French-Swedish sportswear line.  If they were looking to make a splash, they did right by getting White to be in – and out – of their undies.  He’s really quite spectacular, and is not averse to showing a bit of extra skin, as you’ll see on BillyMasters.com.

When we’ve got Russell White in tighty whities, it’s definitely time to end yet another column.  While I face the frigid Northeast, I can warm up on www.BillyMasters.com – the site that gets everyone hot and bothered.  If you have a question worthy of my attention, send it off to Billy@BillyMasters.com, and I promise to get back to you before Colton is named host of The Bachelor (which is not a bad idea).  Until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.

Planes are where I catch up on shows, so I was pleased to have Colton Underwood keeping me company.  I was an unabashed Bachelor watcher until the ouster of Chris Harrison, and relished every twist and turn of Underwood’s experiences on all three shows.  Nothing that has happened since has surprised me – including Netflix’s Coming Out Colton.  This “reality show” relishes – almost luxuriates – in staged sequences.  Given his Bachelor past, Colton understands the importance of doing retakes of “spontaneous” conversations.  But the people around him seem uncomfortable with the practice – particularly his parents and former coach.  Also, I did laugh out loud when Gus Kenworthy answered Colton’s phone call with, “What up, girl?”  We also learned that Colton’s interested in “daddies”.  Beyond that, it’s simple, mindless entertainment…but not without some merit.  There’s a particularly illuminating and touching sequence where Colton meets up with former football players who are gay – including David Kopay (who would make a terrific guest on Billy Masters LIVE when we resume shows in February).  Colton’s interaction with Michael Sam was awkward – did anyone else catch Sam formally introducing himself and shaking Colton’s hand??  Underwood expressed guilt for not standing by Sam when they were both drafted.  Ultimately, the show seems to have three agendas: 1) to explain to people that gay people are just like everyone else, B) to redeem Colton’s sordid reputation, iii) to keep Underwood in the spotlight.  Personally, I’m not sure which was their primary objective.

The Today Show (which is now simply called Today) celebrated 70 years of service – a milestone I hope to achieve in a few decades.  One notable absence was Matt Lauer, who hosted the program for a record 20 years and 331 days (which means he was sacked just a month short of his 21^st anniversary).  I’m told that Savannah Guthrie was the one who nixed Matt being included in the celebration, feeling his presence would tarnish the show’s legacy (although he did appear briefly in a video montage).  This brings to mind a quote we ran last year from a black female tour guide at the Uncle Remus Museum in Eatonton, Georgia.  “You can’t measure your progress if you erase the past.”  Food for thought.

I hope nobody expected Matt to go quietly into that good night.  Taking a page from Katie Couric, Lauer is in the midst of writing a bombshell tell-all.  Our source says the focus of the book is simple – revenge.  He wants to trash everyone who trashed him.  And, since he has nothing to lose, why not?  I can’t wait to read it.

I also missed the Golden Globes, but I wasn’t the only one – nobody was there.  The only celebrity presence was a virtual message from Jamie Lee Curtis, who sent a video noting the work done by the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, whatever that is.  I was surprised to learn she was never a Miss Golden Globes – although she does have two Golden Globes which she proudly displays every chance she gets!  And that’s the only crass joke I’ll make.  One of us is a lady.

Speaking of which, Mj Rodriguez made Golden Globes history as “the first black trans woman to win a Golden Globe”.  Which begs the question – was there previously a trans woman of any kind to have won a Golden Globe?  I’m sure some swift-fingered activist will figure that out.  Congrats, Mj!

Yoshinori Horie is a Japanese MMA star.  When he was 21, he was having trouble paying for his martial arts training.  That’s when a friend told him that he could make easy money giving “handjobs”.  The arrangements were made, and Yoshinori got $175 for less than an hour’s work.  Horie shared this story on social media, and added the following (bear in mind this is a Google translation): “I was able to face martial arts in a short time, exceeding the amount of 2 days of part-time work that I do for 8 hours while standing.  It’s pretty painful now, but as long as I’m alive I can chance my dreams!  And I like women, not gays!  I’ve done the money to live to do martial arts.”  I only have one question – which part was “pretty painful”?  Carpal tunnel?  Asking for a friend…

Meanwhile in Singapore, a popular OnlyFans personality was arrested on multiple charges of obscenity and electronic transmission of pornography.  Police claim that Titus Low, 22, was repeatedly warned that posting on OnlyFans was considered a violation of the law.  It should be noted that the sale and distribution of adult content is illegal in Singapore – as is gay sex.  Apparently, the police were tipped off to Low’s identity in a complaint filed against him on September 4^th.  Titus was warned not to access his OnlyFans account – where he made a five-figure monthly salary!  He’s currently out on bail and is allegedly cooperating with authorities.

Picture it – New York City, 2007.  An attractive young man is visiting from Utah, trying to decide if he should relocate and pursue his dream of acting.  He’s snagged a cheap standing room ticket for The 25^th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee.  When the show ends, a man and a woman come up to him and say, “You look like you were enjoying that show more than people who are sitting in the expensive seats.”  The man then gives the strapping young lad $200 and tells him he should use the money to buy a ticket to see Patti LuPone in Sweeney Todd – “It’ll change your life”.  Not only does the boy do as told (proving he can take direction), he also thinks that if a stranger is willing to do this for him, maybe he should make the move.  The Utah-ian is Claybourne Elder, who is now appearing with La LuPone in Company.  And when he shared the story on Twitter, someone knew the man with deep pockets – Mark Howell (who’s pretty hot himself).  Now, let me tell you the Billy Masters version of this story.  A hot guy is in standing room.  Another guy hands him $200.  Hot guy says, “Hmm – maybe I should move to NYC.”  It’s not a Disney ending…unless you recall that studio also released Pretty Woman.

Amy Schneider, current Jeopardy! trans superstar, had a pretty crappy start to 2022.  “So, first off: I’m fine.  But I got robbed yesterday, lost my ID, credit cards, and phone.  I then couldn’t really sleep last night, and have been dragging myself around all day trying to replace everything.”  What she doesn’t mention is that the robbery happened at gunpoint!  Jeopardy! producers made a statement of their own: “We were deeply saddened to hear about this incident, and we reached out to Amy privately to offer our help in any capacity.” 

While the New Year rang in on CNN, gays from hither and yon were debating whether Andy Cohen was a jocular gent or a loveable louse.  “I will not be shamed for having fun on New Year’s Eve – that’s why I’m there,” said Cohen.  No one debated having fun on NYE – it’s having it on CNN that was the issue.  After much speculation, the network brass weighed in.  “Andy said something he shouldn’t have on live TV.  We’ve addressed it with him and look forward to having him back again next year.”  What Cohen said was, “Ryan Seacrest’s group of losers that are performing behind us.  I mean, with all due…if you’ve been watching ABC tonight, you’ve seen nothing.  I’m sorry.”  The next morning, Cohen felt differently: “The only thing that I regret saying, the only thing is that I slammed the ABC broadcast, and I really like Ryan Seacrest and he’s a great guy.  And I really regret saying that, and I was just stupid and drunk and feeling it.”  The issue is the close friendship Cohen and Cooper have with Kelly Ripa – who co-hosts her daytime show with Ryan.  Andy’s crack puts Ripa in the middle – not helped by the fact that both Cohen and Cooper coveted Seacrest’s seat (so to speak).  It surely makes for an awkward Sunday funday.

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Elsewhere in international news, Switzerland has made a bold move.  As of January 1^st, they are allowing people to legally change their gender by filing a form with the civil registry office.  No proof, examination, or medical procedure is required.  They are also allowing people to change their legal name just as easily.

Louw Breytenbach is giving up his title of Mr. Gay World after less than two months.  The 31-year-old from South Africa refused to sign a contract making the organization his exclusive modeling and acting agent (apparently Louw already has management).  There was also a clause stating that he would be fined 5,000 Euros if he stepped down.  “I am disappointed as I really thought the Mr. Gay World competition was a platform I could use to broaden my charity work.  I also thought they had the interests of the LGBTQI+ community at heart.  Sadly, I was wrong.”  He also questioned what happens to the money the organization raises.  Hmm.

Grindr has allegedly been selling user data to various advertising firms.  SHOCKING!  But this time, they are being fined over $6 million – by the Norwegian Data Protection Authority!  And that’s not the only data Grindr is sharing.  According to their statistics, the United States has the highest percentage of users looking to hook up “Right Now”.  Australians are the most receptive to NSFW photos.  If you’re looking for a top, book a flight to Argentina pronto.  Lastly, the best time to hook up is 9PM on Sunday…the day of rest.

The date – April 11, 1988.  The place – the 60^th Academy Awards.  My first time at the Oscars.  During an interval, I saw an elegant woman who was clearly “somebody”.  I approached and told her she looked like a cross between Maria Callas and Vivien Leigh.  She had a throaty laugh and said, “Darling, I hope you’re referring to when they were still alive!”  Her name was Lady April Ashley.  The next day, Jackie Collins filled me in on April’s colorful past.  She was born George Jamieson and was the second (known) Briton to undergo male-to-female gender reassignment surgery – in Casablanca (where Two People was shot).  After becoming a high-profile fashion model, she married Lord Arthur Corbett – who she swore knew all about her past.  However, his family pressured Artie to have the union annulled and leave April penniless.  Disillusioned by England, she went to America.

After our brief Oscars encounter, I was shocked to see her turn up on The People’s Court – where she was sued for keeping gifts from rich men (like that’s a bad thing).  Judge Wapner not only sided with April, but also flirted with her.  I tracked her down in San Diego, where she was working for Greenpeace and living with two women… both named Anita!  Eventually, she went back to England and became an outspoken advocate for transgender rights.  After decades as an outsider, she was lauded as a trailblazer.  In 2005, she was legally recognized as female.  In 2012, she was honored with a Member of the Order of the British Empire (MBE) – presented by Prince Charles – for her work for transgender equality.  In 2015, the National Museum in Liverpool assembled an enormous exhibition in her honor.  What meant the world to her was having young trans people thank her – she realized her struggle ensured their lives would be easier.  Lady April Ashley made a difference.  She passed away over the holidays at age 86.  Rest in peace, my dear, funny, fabulous friend.

There was a war of words between Aaron Sorkin and Billy Eichner.  It started with Aaron defending the casting of the Spanish Javier Bardem as the Cuban Desi Arnaz.  “Spanish and Cuban are not actable.  If I was directing you in a scene and said: ‘It’s cold, you can’t feel your face.’  That’s actable.  But if I said: ‘Be Cuban.’  That is not actable.  It’s heartbreaking and a little chilling to see members of the artistic community re-segregating ourselves.”  He then added, “You can act being attracted to someone, but you can’t act gay or straight.  So this notion that only gay actors should play gay characters?  That only a Cuban actor should play Desi?  Honestly, I think it’s the mother of all empty gestures and a bad idea.”  While I applaud Sorkin, the analogy enraged Eichner.  “Completely ignorant of how Hollywood has treated its openly LGBTQ+ actors for a century.  Talking about shit he doesn’t fully comprehend.  Scared that Hollywood isn’t (entirely) ruled by straight men anymore.  Go write yourself a ‘walk and talk’ back into the past.  Merry Christmas!”  A curious coda given Sorkin and Eichner are both Jewish.

Darren Criss waded into the same waters.  He previously said he would no longer play gay roles “to make sure I won’t be another straight boy taking a gay man’s role” – which begs the question…is one still a “boy” in their mid-30s?  Criss recently said the following: “No matter what I say, I’m going to get into the same mess that I’ve always gotten in, which is me being what I believe is very fair and diplomatic, but nobody’s interested in that, because compassion is not currently in vogue.  So I don’t know what to say…There are so many performances that are either straight roles given by queer actors or queer roles that are done by straight actors that are so beloved, that we just don’t talk about those.  But if they’re done poorly, we get up in arms and we blame it on the fact that this person isn’t queer, this person isn’t straight, as opposed to maybe they just weren’t the right person for the job?”  This begs a second question – if he’s no longer accepting gay roles, will Darren Criss ever work again?

We can’t start this column without acknowledging the passing of a legend.  Betty White was the last remaining cast member of The Golden Girls and The Mary Tyler Moore Show.  In fact, she lost three MTM colleagues this year – Cloris Leachman, Ed Asner and Gavin MacLeod.  Till the end, she was slightly more Sue Ann Nivens than Rose Nylund – thwarting the advances of Ryan Reynolds and lusting after Robert Redford.  But in actuality, she eschewed romantic entanglements since the passing of her third husband, Allen Ludden.  Everyone loved Betty White…unless you count Bea Arthur.  But that’s the exception that proves the rule.  She was one helluva gal.

And now, Happy New Year!!!  I hate to be predictable, but faithful readers know I spent the eve with loved ones watching a loved one.  Yes, the Billy Masters celebrations included watching Lindsay Wagner’s first film – Two People – and her most recent release – Christmas at the Ranch (not to be confused with her 2019 endeavor, Christmas on the Range).  This new effort is one of those holiday flicks featuring a same-sex couple – and let me add that I’ve yet to see one worthy of the cast.  In Two People (co-starring Peter Fonda), Wagner was briefly topless and elsewhere wore a number of fabulous capes.  So I consider it a draw.

We took a break to check out coverage from Times Square.  It’s been noted that CNN was dominated by gays – even passive gays!  Dear Andy Cohen is always a trailblazer.  Rather than wait to catch the coronavirus over the holiday, he caught it earlier in the month (this was his second bout).  He got the all-clear to join Anderson Cooper – who might have been wise to don a hazmat suit.  All the alcohol mixed with Cohen’s medication beautifully and led to (among other things) a lengthy drunken rant against outgoing Mayor de Blasio.  Reaction from the gays on social media was mixed.  But Andy kept one promise – Anderson was well-lubricated.  And I’ll leave it at that!

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Speaking of Cher, the Dark Lady (that is not a racial slur – that is the name of a song) recently surprised a couple on a date.  Syndie and Tehran went to see West Side Story – and I’m sure you all know Cher’s connection with that show (if not, check out BillyMasters.com).  After the film was over, they stopped in the lobby to take a photo in front of the poster.  A woman asked if they’d like her to take a photo of the two of them, which they appreciated.  Cher later Tweeted this story (with her typical odd caps and punctuation): “When we were coming out of movie I saw beautuful Couple.  He Was taking Her pic….She had flowers I said…can I take your Pic…Had my mask on so they didn’t Know Who I was.  Maybe Just a crazy woman.. THAT ME”  Syndie replied: “Wow!  So we really did meet CHER!  This night will certainly be remembered forever.”

Rex Smith was a HUGE hit with viewers of Billy Masters LIVE!  And, yes, I know I gushed…but was there ever a more staggeringly beautiful man than Rex Smith?  In his prime, he was like the statue of David – if David could sing!  Smith is currently singing in Love Actually Live at The Wallis in Beverly Hills, which closes on New Year’s Eve (get your tix at TheWallis.org).  Since he was coming to us from his cell phone, his audio was a little soft – and the last thing I want is a soft Rex Smith!  So I lent a helping hand and juiced him up – something I’ve longed to say for decades.  The remastered video is available for your watching and listening pleasure at BillyMasters.com/TV or YouTube.com/BillyMastersTV.

This Thursday, December 23^rd, we ring in the holidays with the fabulous Thirsty Burlington.  Many of you know him as Scott Townsend – the world’s premier Cher impersonator.  I’ve known Thirsty since he was an itty bitty baby drag queen sneaking into my shows in various Boston gay clubs in the ‘90s!  He’s had a tough year health-wise, so we’re thrilled to finally welcome him as a guest.